The "Craft girls" cleaned out their cupboard today. Of course I said I didn't want anything. It contained a lot of books, patterns, bits and pieces we had brought in over a couple of years. One of our ladies said she'd box the leftovers and take them to the OP Shop over at the other church. She took six large boxes and we all took at least a shopping bag full home. None of us "wanted" anything but somehow you just know that jar of "tinkle bells" or card of buttons will come in handy some day
What a day yesterday was . I couldn't believe I was not in the middle of a nightmare most of the time. There was a lovely blue sky when we woke up and it seemed like a really good day. I packed up all the things for church, got into the van feeling I had forgotten something. Lunch. Went back inside and got some sandwiches made and defrosted some cake. Ready, set, off we go.
Got down the driveway across the road and went to put it into gear, nothing. Motor running, wheels not moving.
My Dad often said:"It takes all kind of people to make a world". Ho hum, we would think, and what is THAT supposed to mean? Thinking back he was probably trying to console himself for having to deal with the more ornery ones, but Dad was no quitter and could be friends with anyone. I was just amazed by the variety of people who turned up at his funeral, all who had come to farewell, "dear old Pat", "me old mate Paddy", the "best neighbour ever", "someone I'll never forget" to quote some of t
I bumped into the husband of an old friend of mine today. *J* and I belonged to a couple of the same groups but didn't become friends till we did a twenty week course together. For a while we were as close as sisters. Then we saw each other at least twice a week. After that we saw each other intermittently. Somewhere during this time her husband got transferred to the same work place. During a conversation he told me *J* had cancer and asked if I would like to join her caretaker network. Thi
I seem to be lonely again. It happens from time to time, the usual routine folds up for some reason, Ray gets extra tired so we don't go out as much. Then the family get busy, busy busy with their own lives and we hardly see them. The world around us seems to grow quiet, Ray goes off for a nap and I am left here feeling lonely and a little out of sorts and maybe a bit sorry for myself.
I don't think this is altogether about being a caregiver to a stroke survivor although that has certain
This is a vent so be prepared.
Ray and I went to the Community Stroke Support Service's Group Education program. This was week two, we missed week one because we were away.
All the people there had come because they had a need. We certainly do as I found out today that the second care provision group appointed to find me a three hour respite has also run out of funds for our particular classification (it is a funding thing, where have I heard that before?) so my problem once more is
We just went away for five days' holiday, a coach tour to a town about three hours drive from here. It is part of the biggest horse breeding area outside of Kentucky. The day tours were centred on horses but included historical homesteads and places where breeding horses for racing first started in that area and we visited the most fabulous stud full of the loveliest horses imaginable. I am not a horse rider but have been involved in the racing industry a long time ago and the sight of those
We did it, we went to Terrigal Beach, the big wheel beach chair was there, the boys put Ray in it and we went in and out of the water which was shallow at low tide and had some fun. Ray was happy to just put his feet in the sand and allow the water to splash him. It was the first time he had been in the sea since his major strokes in 1999.
Of course Tori and her Dad came too and she had heaps of fun running in and out of the waves, mainly with Dad, but at one stage she said:"Girls turn" a
Ray came onto chat this afternoon( Wednesday night New York time) Thursday noon onwards here. I did some of the typing though he used the shift key and some of the time it was what I was thinking that went into the replies and sometimes he had some imput. I don't know whether it is possible for others to work out which one of us is talking, eh Gary? But anyway we stayed on for about an hour and communicated to the few who came in and out. Of course if you were watching the Grammies instead of
I had some suggestions about Ray's eating and I thought I'd do something about them. I always used to keep little frozen meals but had run out of them. Today was a cooler day, an ideal day to make casseroles so I planned a couple taking a couple of hours to cook. No1 went well, not a problem, minced pork and vegetables, three portions,neatly packed away.
No 2 was on, beef and onions cut up small, but it somehow didn't smell right. Couldn't work it out so kept it cooking. Now I always a
Common emotional side-effects for caregivers:
* Anger
* Guilt
* Doubt
* Impatience
* Helplessness
* Resentment
* Depression and anxiety
Hey, I just pasted this here from a classic post Jean has just brought back for us.
I had a mixed day again today, some things went well, other things just got on top of me.
The "last straw" was something Ray did that Mum did as part of her Alzheimers. He put a few things on the dining table, a couple of plates, knives, cups and
Well it doesn't take much to have a day off as a carer, you just ignore all the things that don't need doing and do what you want to do for a change. I mean you still get up, cook breakfast, change the bed, empty the bin etc. You just do it at your own pace. Then you tackle the next dozen jobs or so and voila! a day off. (Okay so I am not really telling you anything you didn't already know, there is no such thing as a day off!!)
I had a day "off" today. I sat up late last night and fina
I asked Ray if he would like to come in and go into the chat room with me. I have been working in the garden, it is hot, steamy and generally unpleasant but I got quite a lot done. It is a struggle to go out in the heat and I am glad I have a good temperature control as I know a lot of people don't.
Now I am ready to sit down for a while and do something else. Ray is sitting on the verandah reading, he reads Readers Digest magazines and their condensed books which are given to us by frie
I don't know if you have old churches in your area that have churches with something that looks like a brick triangle attached to the side. That is a buttress, designed to keep the walls straight and not allow the burden of the roof to force the walls apart. It is sometimes used as an addition to an older building for the same purpose. Flying buttresses reach further up and are often designed to keep the stresses from forcing the ceiling to collapse and the walls to fall outwards.
One of
BBQ's have been a big feature of our lives lately. We had two today. The first was lunch, I suggested it as a BBQ lunch on Australia Day seemed the real deal. It was very nice, lamb chops with onion, barbecued pineapple and salads. For someone on a low fat diet I've eaten my share of fat lately. No big deal as long as the pain stays away.
Tonight we went to a barbecue with friends from a social club we belong to. I enjoyed it at first but as the evening wore on it became obvious that
I was talking to Suez in chat and my son came and put a wooden cobra over my shoulder. I hate snakes in real life and even that one gave me shivers. Even a 30 year old kid likes to tease his mother.
We went on to talk about people coming and going in our lives. In Australia the kids who come back home are called "boomerangs" they come home for a variety of reasons, end of relationships, loss of job (our son) to go to University or ongoing training. The nest is always there it seems, wai
I have been looking back through old discs to find some early letters on family subjects to add to my family tree. Now I am not a logical person in a lot of ways so my discs are not purpose file discs, they are old back-up discs so they contain a whole lot of photos, emails and letters. It has kept me amused for nights re-reading old letters.
It seems to me that when we first contact someone we are really enthusiastic. We want to give them all our details, share happy incidents, boast ab
This morning Ray had the visit from the Speech Therapist, she really is a sweetie and has put a lot of thought into the exercises she has designed to help Ray's swallowing. She says he has "silent aspiration" which means that liquids slip down his windpipe and he doesn't react to it at all. Yes, she did talk about thickened fluids but said we'd do some exercises first.
She was here for almost an hour, was polite, funny, sad about what she had to tell us, eager to help. She is such a cont
I have had the last time ANYONE is going to tell me I have to try to get Ray to do his exercises. No I don't. They are his exercises. He is an adult male aged 63. He is not my child. I don't HAVE to do anything.
All my married life I have tried to get Ray to do things. It started with a "to do" list. I did the inside work, he did the outside work. I was half-way through my first pregnancy, grass up to my knees one day when the first person to tell me to "Try to get Ray to do" someth
Hope this is something like what Susan Lowe did in her pattern. Mine has an ancestry focus.
I am from the long line of Winchester and Wood women, from double chins and strong hands holding children. I am from pioneers who went to Utah in the 1880's and my birth family who came to Australia in 1955, I am from Britain not England, from 1066 and all that and from the mists of Ireland and the highlands of Scotland.
I am from the peace and quiet of the urban seaside suburb. Not from t
Considering it is hot today, we had our grand daughter here last night on a "sleepover" so I didn't sleep very heavily for fear of not hearing her if she woke up and all the other factors in my life I am surprised but I feel great!! It is definitelt a "better day".
Ray and I participated in a chat (Friday nght for USA, noon Saturday for us)and we must be quite a sight as we sit side-by-side. His face is raised, looking at the screen, a concentrating look on his face. I bend sideways so I
Our daughter has been urging us to come for a visit, so I rang tonight to say that we could maybe come next Tuesday for three days but wouldn't be able to bring the wheelchair as there wouldn't be room in our friends car for luggage and the chair. She was less than enthusiastic. She pointed out how busy they are, the kids are on school holidays but have plans for the week and...
I backed down as I usually do. I think they had seen us a bit over Christmas and that is probably enough for n
We went to see the physio today taking the ultrasound results with us. It was as the physio thought. Ray's left shoulder shows muscle tears and now atrophying muscles. All he could advise was a couple of exercises that he can do laying down of a morning that will hopefully allow him to keep the muscle that he has got and stop further deterioration. He also said he had taken the leg exercises as far as they could go. The fact is that Ray is back where he started from every time we go back so
I had a visit from Ray's Stroke assesment Team social worker today. Ray is to go into an assessment program, seven weekly meeetings on Tuesday afternoons. We miss the first session, on St Valentine's Day as we will be away on a five day break.The first session is an assessment day (another one!)the rest will involve professionals, OT, ST, physios etc that will evaluate the group and each member of the group.
I have agreed to drive Ray to these meetings as I think that out of the comfort
I came onto the board this morning and wah!! all the prettiness of Christmas had gone and we are back to green. All plain and practical and serviceable but no longer exciting or colourful or stimulating.
In the church I belong to we call all the Sundays that are not special celebratory days Sundays in "Ordinary time". There are a few now and more from June to November. These were the teaching times of the ancient church. The time when people learned the history and procedures of the chur
