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The Journey Continues

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First timer with any support group

Foxnix Posted on: Sep 9 2004, 07:03 AM

 

 

Member

 

 

Group: Members

Posts: 75

Joined: 19-March 04

From: Carriere. Mississippi

Member No.: 2577

 

 

Hi Cindy

 

You are very welcome for anything you may of gotten from my Posts.

Life has a funny way of twisting things around at times. You see I am here to thank You for your posts and your answers to them.

 

You see I had been holding thoes feelings inside me for over a year. When you wrote your feelings in such a sensitive and heart felt way, it was like the dam that I had been carrying around inside of me burst forth on to these pages. I dont know how to explaine it, but it was your words so aptly written that helped me to finally let go and express what had been weighing me down with the pain of loss and fustration. It was like you helped me to unlock a part of myself that I may never have found without your putting your feelings down in such an eloquent and passionate way. So Cindy it is I who owe you so very much for what you did for me. Not many people or their words can do what you did for me. You made it possible for that part of myself to be reborn, and lessen the load I was carrying so deeply buried inside me. So I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

 

Another one of lifes ironic little twists.

 

 

 

 

 

 

First timer with any support group

Foxnix Posted on: Sep 8 2004, 06:50 PM

 

 

Member

 

 

Group: Members

Posts: 75

Joined: 19-March 04

From: Carriere. Mississippi

Member No.: 2577

 

 

 

 

Hi Cindy

 

I cant speak for other survivors, but my personality changed, I found it hard to express the Love and romantic side that used to come so naturally. It's not that I dont Love my wife as much as before, I just lost alot of that part of me. I still have a very hard time after more than a year hugging her are being huged by her or anyone. I dont do the little romantic things I used too, or tell her I Love her without her saying it first.

 

Ofcourse she thinks that I dont Love her or care anymore, but anything could be futher from the truth. How do I explaine that it isn't her , it's me? How do I explaine that part of me isnt there anymore? How do I explaine what it's like to have a stroke?? I can put these word on paper, but can't express them anymore.

I still Love my wife, but I cant show her, or tell her that I need her more now then ever and have never stopped loving her.

 

Your answer to my post touched me in away I cant explaine. I can just say dont ever stop making him say I Love You!!!! That is the greatest healing power on earth.

 

I wish I could tell you why I changed in the ways I have?? Fear, depression, maybe that part of my brain was damaged. I truly dont have the answer or understand it any better than you do. All I can say is You Go Girl !!!!!

 

Sometimes I find myself greving for thoes parts of me that are no longer there for me. Its like parts of me died. But I do know that even though My wife and I dont understand everything that happened when Lightening struck, She has stuck it out and still grabs me and hugs me and makes me tell her I Love You. I dont know if thoes parts of me will ever come back. But I do know that even though its hard for me to tell her or show her I Love Her. LOVE IS STRONGER THAN LIGHTENING.

 

 

Forum: Stroke Caregiver Support

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