Ray and I went and picked up the bone scan today and naughty me took out the report and read it. I did medical terminology so had a fair idea of what it said. Sadly Ray has had many many fractures and bone bruises from falls and signs of arthritic joints on his left (affected) side, nerve damage caused by stenosis (narrowing) of the spinal canal etc. It is so sad he has prematurely aged so much. I could also see why he has so much pain with the equivalent of a pinched nerve and the heel and ankle problems.

The way forward at this stage is cortisone needles into his left heel, and I am hoping the doctor recommends some physiotherapy to help improve his walking. He is so hesitant now with his walking that to take him out to the car can take ten minutes. I am still reluctant to take him in and out of the house in the wheelchair but that will be what happens in the end I guess. Or worse he will be in a wheelchair permanently.

I’ve had three interrupted nights sleep in a row so I am tired through the day and unable to sleep at night. I have cancelled all our activities for this week to give Ray an easier week but that means missing a dinner with some nice friends on Thursday night at a restaurant I wanted to go to. It is something we only do every three months or so. I hate canceling out as I really look forward to these get-togethers. I have enough of meetings, church, serious stuff etc, a night out with friends is simply light relief.

Winter, wind and rain and cold nights, all add up to muscle stiffness and discomfort for Ray and several colds and chesty coughs for me. When Ray is sick I hasten out of bed in the middle of a cold night, race around without socks and shoes on, in and out of the house if I have to get the wheelchair, no wonder I am getting cold after cold. I just pray all of this settles down soon.

So no craft today (too windy and cold) no Kids Club tomorrow afternoon (too late coming home, too cold etc) and by Friday I should be stir crazy! I like a busy life but fear that with Ray’s worsening conditions this will soon be a thing of the past unless I can get a good deal more help

I did drop some things in to Mum today as I had been cleaning out and found some more of her nicer sweaters and thought she could use a change. She was asleep so I didn’t wake her up. She looks so little now. Most of the ladies were asleep. As it was nearly lunchtime the aides were waking them to go to the bathrooms and getting them ready to sit down in the dining room. It is strange that life is so routine for them, these once so active ladies.

Please pray for us, for healing for Ray and for strength for me to carry on and do whatever needs to be done.