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  2. Final Entry

    Well, it's been a long road to hoe, but Dad passed away on March 14, 2018. While it was not a stroke that did Dad in, I'm sure the history of the stroke and diagnosed vascular dementia helped. Per the death certificate, the doctors called it "End Stage Dementia". Lots happened since the last time I was on and even posted, but as a quick timeline... Dad lived with me until April 2017.... April 2017 - Moved into Assisted Living September 2017 - Had a cognitive issue that required him to be "in respite" on the rehab side of things. It was meant as a temporary holding space until the memory care unit opened up. Early October 2017 - Got pneumonia Mid to Late October 2017- His kidneys failed and he ended up with a "classic" catheter and 50% kidney function; and was placed formally in the nursing home. Thanksgiving - 2017 - The "classic" catheter was changed to a permanent supra-pubic December 2017 - Things were okay... January 2018 - I started noticing him dropping things and not really with it. February 2018 - I was helping him with a special treat and at one point he could not tell that he was not holding it and was chewing his own finger; more dropping issues; Early March 2018 - We started him with the in-house doctor as it was too hard to get him out; She recommended that it may be time for hospice. March 11, 2018 - Hospice paperwork signed March 14, 2018 - He was gone So now I have to relearn how to live my life. I put so much on hold while taking care of him and being so involved even after moving to AL. It's only been 4 months, sometimes it feels like yesterday. Other times, it's easier to bear. As much I know saying something can create the situation, this first year is going to kinda suck. I've been to my therapist and we talked about the fact of his passing and realizing that I'm now grieving mom finally too. Dad moved in with me in Sept of 2013; Mom had just passed Feb 2013; His strokes all happened in Jan 2014. I never had a chance to properly grieve for her. Now I'm reliving her passing and coping with Dad's passing also. So that's it in a nutshell. I had wonderful friends throughout this that helped and are still helping me. I'm still struggling from time to time, but it will get easier.
  3. I feel the same
  4. Yesterday
  5. THATTA GIRL! You can't keep a good egg down! I think that often people don't realize that when you come here often enough for everyone to get to know you, you become one of our tribe members, and everyone feels that you're like part of a family. And when you're not here, we miss you, and want to know you're OK.
  6. Pam yesterday I totally went off track and got 10 chicken nuggets and a Dr. PEpper on my way to Nashville to my Dr. Appointment. I left off the fries thinking it was better that I not eat those too. Well I'm still craving those fries!!!! I should have gotten them but at that time I didn't know I had something to celebrate! My A1c was 6.9 in January and I found out yesterday that my A1c is now 6.3 Not that I needed to start off on the wrong foot but one thing I do not do is beat myself up for cheating. I'm honest. Mmmmm fries!!!!!? Kelli I would share with you. I also found out a little more about my dad. He has non small cell adenocarcinoma and it is extremely close to his esophagus which makes it inoperable. They are worried about 2 lymph nodes very close to the area and there is some sort of inflammation on his lower lung...He thinks from COPD and not cancer. They will have to do radiation and possible chemotherapy...small doses of radiation over a longer period of time so it will not damage his esophagus. Two good things...It is non small cell and stage 1...oh and the Oncologist says he should have a 80-85% chance of cure.
  7. yeah it's a yummy food. It's an silly thing between us. But I do LOVE Mc Donald's FF's
  8. She wanted to give you all a hug and thank you for asking :) She's busy helping others and being awesome
  9. Sorry Steve my food blog got too long and should not be here!
  10. Sorry Tracy I got excited looking at fries right?
  11. ok now I gotta go out for fries!!! but I have always eaten mine with mustard. Even before there were chilie cheeses guacamole or pastrami tomato fries, I asked for packs of mustard. My kids like ranch dressing with fries best. And we all like BBQ on them. And steak fries great with sour cream and onion dip I made at home. Like a finger food baked potato. Criss cross fries and nacho sauce is good and I like those for making hor douvres topping with taco seasoned hamburger with tomatoes with sour cream salsa topping. But I used good old frozen bags of criss cross fries to make that. It was always good when I did not want to do typical chips. Now I keep fries out of my diet except for 1 or 2x a month because I am on lo salt low carb diet. I tend to want tortilla chips more often with mango salsa. That is my new sophisticated snacking crave and I can make a meal on them and yet because of my edema even that is restricted. This is even harder than restricting sugar...i can live without that very often. But Right now I am doing toasted bagel with cream cheese and pineapple on it. My kind of pizza. Or like today I will have american cheese melted on toasted bagel. I used to make that in an oven at home. little toaster oven. now we get toasted bagel and melting cheese in microwave. I like it chewier too. Good thing it is xBfast!!! coffee and cinnamon time. my latest thing is mixing sanka and cocoa in hot water. Great stuff!! Handy around here. I got my cnas talking about toppings now. some creative things.
  12. Tracy 🦄 That is your dad being the protector he is. I know you have had a hard time living there but maybe now you are a blessing to help your dad and also to make the most of time together. Change can occur fast so I am glad everyone was honest though. I will pray you have strength and peace while your dad goes through some of the darkest forrests known to man. None of you are alone.
  13. People do come and go, I've been here since 2006 so met hundreds of people, some of whom I considered friends. As they sometimes left suddenly I wondered what to do. Luckily I found some old friends on Facebook so now I catch up with them there. But moving on is a good thing most of the time so I am happy for them when they no longer NEED us.
  14. I know people come and go from here but yes I miss Linnie and Janelle too. If anyone hears from them pass on hugs from me too
  15. Becky....I have wondered about all those folks.
  16. omg yeah Fred Gosh seems lots on break I miss old chat gang i cannot get on my phone
  17. Kelli, Please tell her I'm glad she's OK. I knew she mentioned she was having surgery, and would be MIA for "awhile". But "awhile" became longer and longer, and I was getting concerned. In a similar vein, anyone heard from Fred? I know that he said that he was leaving, and why, but I figured he'd take a "breather" and come back. I'm concerned because, as I recall, both he and his wife had some health concerns. Jeanelle? aka "Green Queen"? She's newer to the group, but she was here nearly every day. Then she wasn't here. I loved her British/Aussie way of saying things. Becky
  18. Last week
  19. Paul, I lived in Margate for half of WW2. I was evacuated there from Egypt via Jerusalem. That is a long story on its own! My wife and I did a world trip twenty years ago and I was able to visit the place again. I was able to repeat a fifty year old photograph of me fishing from a bridge over the lagoon. Deigh
  20. I'm with you with this like Ketchup & Fries xxxxx
  21. so strange I read this now for my Aunt and I were talking about her lists. I always try to be active-ish in the summer for winter and darker earlier causes me to go into a depression and then do I find time for things. :(
  22. I've recently talked to her, via e-mail, and she's good. She also, on top of the PM's, had family situations she was dealing with. I'll pass along your thoughts of her
  23. yes I remember her name. Well the sneaky PM thing. Obviously knew the remarks were going to hurt her. That coward. Too bad she did not save it but as a first response it must have been rotten. It takes diligence to watch over a site because some people are guests and you never knew who the nutball is. God Bless Linnie
  24. Thank you Asha. Yes I hope to know more tonight. They told my stepmom what kind of cancer but she can't remember so my sister is going with them today and take notes. Course of treatment will be dependent on the kind of cancer and staging. I have my hopes up that it was caught early. I'll write updates. Thanks.
  25. Oh I really hate that, and yes Asha I miss her. Steve thank you for updating me. Asha if you do speak with her let her know I was asking about her and I miss her. Thanks.
  26. Steve : oh wow I never knew that, I usually read everything in blogs so never knew someone can be offensive or rude in their comments. Sometimes people can tend to interpret written words quite differently based on their state of mind & can make drastic decision, will send her message letting her know some of us who know her for long time do miss her around here Asha
  27. I was very good friends with her so she told me why she was leaving StrokeNet. She had just started blogging. Unfortunately, another member PM'd her with some very rude and personal comments. She was extremely offended and hurt. She was so upset that she immediately deleted his PM so I was therefore unable to discipline the member. She is now helping stroke survivors at a rehab facility.
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