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ksmith

Executive Management
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Everything posted by ksmith

  1. ksmith

    I agree with the unfortunate time it takes but it'll be worth it
  2. Only week 1 and it already feels like a month. I’m not used to being busy every day. My brain needs down time but that is the hardest part. I’m so thankful that I was honest and they tried to accommodate me... AND THEY HAVE. My fear was I was going to a busy and stressful group home and I would have become overwhelmed. I have been sent to an apartment complex where there is a number of residents who require ‘assisted living’. Most of them work and only require little prompting to help us with cooking, cleaning and medical. We do drive them where they would like to go because the ARC’s (Agency) is to provide a regular life. So many can just say, “I am going to visit a friend” and if they wish to walk... Then wish them a safe trip. They are the boss, as they should be for their own lives. I’m going to mainly be with a woman who has seizures and other health issues so I can become acquainted with how things work down there. I’ll have to work hard to adjust my sleep schedule for Saturday and Sundays I’ll be on 7a-3p the Monday and Wednesdays 3p-11p. The good thing is I’ll be with the same person. I’m the second oldest one there and since I’ve been out of the game for a while, I ask questions. Some may say a lot and that causes tension I our group by oh well. I enjoy the people I’ve been with … Mind you this is only the start of week two.. Come back to ask me in a few months lol
  3. ksmith

    "A friend of mine told me that I should cross fold a sheet and lay it under him. This would help me to turn him. I will do that when I have the nurse come in today. This morning he has been compliant and let me turn him by myself. Maybe he is getting too tired to fight me. I have scheduled a nurse to come out tomorrow and a CNA. I will call them again on Monday to make sure that they have the same thing set up for the week. Who knows. I may still need all of that help." Might this help?
  4. ksmith

    Manic Monday

    Well Monday I go back to work for the first time in 9 years. As we all know, living on Social Security and single, is very difficult. It is so expensive to live in New Jersey, or any where for that matter. Don't get my wrong, I'm thankful for what I do get but it's so tight. I know when I finish with orientation, two weeks 70 hrs., I'll go to part-time so I'll have down time. I've been trying to stay busy everyday to get adjusted to staying focused and that hasn't really gone as I hoped. I'm good for a few days but after that I completely shut down. I know I sabotage myself by pushing back on things, I know I do it and still I get worried. My head, on today it has been raining, feels like you've been on a tire swing and spun super fast and now you're trying to walk. I often call it my A-HA walk. in the video he bounces back and forth on walls. I know I just have to do my best and I know once my air ducts and/or AC unit cleaned or new, I'll feel better. Breathing in mold, as I have for the past 4 years causes chronic fatigue ( on top of the fatigue I already have).. I'll put my best foot forward. 🤞🏻
  5. ksmith

    fast no more

    Yesterday I finally had my ablation on my heart to stop the rapid heart beat. I wasn't nervous for my cousin, who is a cardiac nurse and also had this done, walked me through everything. It didn't hit me that I remember them adding the adrenalin to make my heart race so they could find out where the 'road block' was. Basically, you have two tracks that the electrical currents in your heart go around that keep your heart function. So Imagine you have two tracks above each other but the one with that contains the faster of the current (: if you get excited or caffeine your heart beats faster and you also have a slow lane that keeps the balance- ) well one of mine didn't have a complete track because one of the tracks had extra muscle that made the faster currents speed faster in half the space. When the current would get trapped in the smaller loo[p, my hear rate would jump to 240+ beats per min. SOOO.. When I felt them making my hear to go fast, my jaw started to hurt, I began to sweat , same as always, but when it stopped I thought they stopped the medicine for I didn't feel the usual chest pains but it just stopped beating fast. That was the time when he performed the procedure and fixed the problem.. it is amazing. The down side is they went into both side of my groin so pain, no driving, no swimming, no lifting.. To most people that might sound like a day off but no driving to my Aunts house to swim in her pool.. But I can drink coffee.. but I'm still scared but he ( the Dr) said it was textbook so no issues. Same day.. Long day. My parents and I left my house at 4:30a for the 90 min drive.. put on to prep at 7:15a wheeled into the OR 8am finished at 12pm.. post op full bedrest until 4:00pm.. leave hospital 4:30pm (Philadelphia Rush Hour) made it home by 6:45p.. My son, 15, stayed home with the cats.. don't blame him.. I slept partially seated for my pelvic area was so sore.. Better today.. Apparently I emailed people while still drugged lol
  6. same thing. I snap my fingers but sometimes I just don't want to talk for I can't even get a thought out. This is mostly why I don't talk to people on the phone that don't know I've had a stroke
  7. I make a list for the doctor but sadly either I 'think' we talked about it and get lost in the conversation. I am fortunate I have a separate doctor for my 'brain' and one just for basic health care. I live near to a few Neuroscience Hospitals. I found out long ago that my family doctor only knows your basic needs, as a GP should know that's why he's a family doctor, and I never felt any of my concerns where being answered. I was talking to a friend on the phone last night and , we both do this, in the middle of a great point.... (poof) thought gone.. No note could bring it back lol 😵
  8. ksmith

    Sue, What a shock to hear and you are putting on a great face. I truly believe you have been a blessing for many that you are going to be blessed. With all that is out in the medical field, could there be a way to decrease or monitor so you can live everyday with happiness in your heart and a smile on your face xxoox
  9. ksmith

    Tracy.. I have issues going to bed but it'd with ADD.. Maybe you need a sleeping pill.. I need to have it or my brain keeps me up all night long, no matter how tired I am I take Trazadone … That may not work for you but even still , sometimes it doesn't do the trick..
  10. ksmith

    I knew I smelled something

    So when things started to look okay, working isn’t a fact I’m looking forward for but it is a must, and I was able to get back on track, the reality of my nose finally made sense. Let me explain: I often said I smelled ‘cigarette smoke’ every time my air conditioner turned on. I said smoke because I couldn’t make a comparison to anything else. I bought cleaning supplies to clean my air conditioner unit with my father. I had to wait until a cool day and now is the time. We opened the closet door to my air conditioner air compressor thingy, we saw a large puddle of water on the floor. My water pan, for the moisture, was always overflowing. There is a flap that is supposed to be on the unit where you insert the filters mine wasn’t there. For the past almost every years... I didn’t know so all the moisture from outside is coming directly to my unit. So the smoke smell I was always smelling is in fact MOLD. I do have two air purifies and they work nonstop. So tomorrow I have someone coming out to give me an estimate for either cleaning or replacement. UGH... When it rains it pours. Just venting... It’s all good. It is what it is. I just came back from a stroke support group luncheon with three other groups (Caregivers, TBI, stroke survivors) I feel ok and tomorrow after I meet with the repair man I have a meeting for tax freezing, for those on disability. That means you pay a set so if it goes up I pay it but I get the difference back at the end of the year then to meditation in the afternoon to end my day. Namaste
  11. ksmith

    I have gone weeks, if not months, between talking to friends or family for talking on phone is my worst nightmare. I read the faces of those I talk to and they can also see when I'm struggling. Thankfully they understand.. Having Aphasia and hearing issues ( mainly tones) as well as been a life long stutter , phone and public is terrifying. I can free talk but when you ask me a detailed question in need of a detailed answer.. forgettabouitit ( throw-back to HostWill xx) It's like my brain just shuts down
  12. ksmith

    It's so hard when you find that one person who makes you want to try harder.. then they leave.. The only thing we can do is to instill in ourselves to try harder.. But it still sucks
  13. ksmith

    these are very poignant words though truths. Powerful
  14. I posted this to Facebook and asked some in our stroke chat group and got a back good responses but I wanted to ask you : In my local stroke group meeting , I was able to talk to another couple there and the wife needed to vent: Wife ( we'll call her Tammy) Husband ( we'll call him John) Tammy turned to the meeting leader ( speech pathologist In re hospital) and myself and shared she was asking how to get on a schedule for they have 2 children and she is a realtor as well as home schools the kids and all she asks is to have some help. So I explained to both Tammy and John the (https://butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory spoon theory and she understood but I couldn't really explain to her how I feel with can't getting out of bed. I'm going to a Caregivers support meeting soon so I may try to gain even more understanding. Tammy said she is perfectly happy with him staying in bed for the morning but wishes he would help out some more. John gets up and goes to WaWa ( convenient store) and stays there for a few hours, also going to his old job to talk for a while then re returns and needs to take a nap. Again, she understands his stroke and the damage in his brain. Also from the huge scar on the side of his head. She loves him dearly and one of the things that drew them together was reading the bible together. John, on the other hand, shows some of the same emotional problem that I have which is a disconnect. He often tells Tammy that he understands he isn't the guy she married. That breaks her heart and I, personally, understand for on the outside he looks like the same guy. Mentally he is different as I appear to be to others . I explained my lowest point when my ex-husband got called to work and asked me to please come up to his house to help Johnny get up and out to school. I got really upset for all I thought was 'why do I have to watch his son'...HE'S MY SON TO. But that goes to my disconnect and why at a moments notice I will fly to Florida to see my oldest son to keep him in the forefront of my memories. Tammy kinda thinks its sorta the same and doesn't know why do. Has anything like this ever happened , or known of, to you?
  15. ksmith

    My voice is a tad deeper for intubation as well.. my mothers late friend had her chords damaged by a tracheotomy many years ago so when you heard her she sounded like a "6 packs a day Margie" Loved this women with everything
  16. ksmith

    it's crazy but in all seriousness, I hear music in everything. That may sound strange but I have always had the 'static' or white noise in my head so this is how I deal with it. like I said before, I always have to have music or even a spoken podcast, book. I literally carry around a Bluetooth speaker wherever I go. There is always something playing. I also have : https://www.emedicinehealth.com/tinnitus/article_em.htm#where_does_the_condition_originate
  17. ksmith

    OMG whenever I had to get a Cat scan.. I always took the 'pings' and made a song in my head. I swore that was what it was playing
  18. ksmith

    xxooxx it was taken this summer .. I've since cut my hair to a bob
  19. ksmith

    Though I may have not agreed with many of his policies , he is a true patriot. I had a cousin die from brain cancer, 3 days after I came out of rehab and with my memory issues I can't remember our childhood together, and I commend him for everything he has done for his country. I hope when it does happen, he has no pain and as in peace.
  20. ksmith

    I am so jealous. I'm glad you saw it and I bet it was amazing
  21. ksmith

    Ruth, I'm sorry that it had to come to this but I'm very glad you got all things in order beforehand so you have a clear(er) mind and schedule to devote to spending time with him. I was absolutely warmed with all that hospice offers and the volunteers that will be able to help. And never forget that , as you may know, even through he may be sleeping a lot, he can still hear you. As Sue said, keep time for yourself ..
  22. ksmith

    hey there. Steve made a groovy step-by-step guide ----------------------------->http://www.strokeboard.net/index.php?/advanced_help.html/gallery/how-do-i-add-an-image-to-the-gallery-r21/ If you still have problems, let me know :) I am excited to see these pictures
  23. ksmith

    I have had to make decision and look for a job. Living on disability when you are single , no matter what age, is tough so I went to The Arc which is an organization that helps people with mental and physical disabilities live in society mainly in group homes. Well I start orientation on September 10th for two weeks. Back to back days.. I'm afraid I'm not going to be at my best.. 77 hours in 2 weeks. Old me would have been able to function on 3 hours of sleep doing that.. New me, needs a nap after a shower. Long days and one Over night.. HOLY CROW.I told them after these two weeks, no over nights and they know I'm part time. I'll be in a group home with about 5-8 clients and support staff, like me, and basically monitoring and encouraging them in their daily life for that is THEIR house. SO no lifting ( per Neurologist) First job in 9 years... it's sad that we have to work when we are on disability.. I can't even get assistance for I make to much in social security. How ridiculous is that but it is what it is. When you're young, as I've said in my blog, you are to young for many programs. I'm was so nervous in the interview with the HR director I said when he gave me the script for my drug test " I guess I should have stopped using crack before today"
  24. I had my family reunion this past weekend and I paced myself and it is always a grand time. Everyone, with the exception of a few, live with in driving distance for a long weekend. My sister and her broad are staying with me and at my parents for a few more days. The arrived on Friday and leaving Tuesday. I forgot how my 'sensory overload' and OCD affects me sometimes. I only have a 900 sq.ft. place. Normally I'm ok with people at my house. I love my sister and BIL & kids, don't get me wrong, I just have a way of doing things. I know I know, we all say this when others come into our space. When things become 'switched up' around me it causes me a physical pain either in my chest or stomach. ( I've been diagnosed with OCD). I think that's why I never want to date because I don't want to share my space with anyone. This became more intense after my stroke. yes I goofed on my Xanax so I have no more for 2 more weeks however, I always felt this way when people come over. ((even my parents)) How do you all who have hosted folks handle this? So I know for next time
  25. ksmith

    OK I might sound trite. I was raised with the love of the royal family. My great-grandmother first introduced me to the 'family' and I love them...but...I adore Henry.. or better known as Harry but I respect the Queen and I know she is up in age and times have changed with how the royals are viewed but I'm not warming up to Meghan. I am just personally embarrassed by our Hollywood entitlement that I don't want ill will to him. I know he loves her and from what I have heard so does the Queen... I don't know.. Just follow tradition ( in actions) It's petty but there it is
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