LSL

Thank you Fred. I've continued having the TIA's, after my two major strokes, since 1999. It is a very long time, and at times it feels like some sort of prison sentence, except my body is the prison. I can't hardly go out due to my health problems, and I find myself, once again, trying to get better from another ailment. When I'm down like this my son gives my daughter and I a really rough time. He is getting individual counseling from a psychologist, and getting individual anger management counseling as well. If he has a bad day he takes it out on my daughter and I verbally, and with his defiance. He even climbed out the bathroom window one day, without my knowledge, and was playing outside with the neighbor's dog. He knows I won't bother him while he's in the bathroom, but the next time I feel like locking the bathroom window, the front door, and the back door to teach him a lesson. He's also been lying to me, and that's difficult for me to take, because I try as best I can to be an honest person. He's heading down a dark path, I feel, and I hope that he can turn back and see the light before he goes down any further. It breaks my heart! Anyway, I appreciate your support Fred. You always seem to know what to say to try and help me, and I appreciate that. Thank you.

Thank you Nancy & Becky for your input. I only have two children, and he is the younger of the two. My daughter is 17, and finally appreciating me, so she yells at him and defends me. He had accused others of bullying him, but in turn found out that he was bullying right back as well. I just learned yesterday that he's been swearing at school as well. Not only is swearing against school policy here, but I don't allow it in my home. My daughter admitted, when she was probably about his age, that she used to swear, but she stopped, because it made her feel bad about herself. My son on the other hand doesn't seem to have a conscience of any kind. It's very disturbing, because he shuts off when I try to talk to him. He doesn't want me to tell him anything. As far as discipline I have taken away the video game console and the satellite box, so he can't play games or even watch TV. He doesn't seem to care, but his anger towards me has increased. Last night he had a concert that he played an instrument in for school. His band ended their performance at 7:15 PM, and he didn't get home until 9:30 PM. I even called his best friends mom to see if he was over there, and she informed me her son hadn't come home either. I guess there was a fire at a nearby shed, so half the town was there watching the fire department put the fire out, but he knows my rules that I want him home right after anything to do with school, yet he still disobey's. I can't go to the concert's to "babysit" him, due to my health issues. He's just trying to defy me at every angle. My counselor told me that at his age this is what teens do, but that I need to put my foot down and enforce the rules. I've been doing everything they've been teaching me, but he isn't responding to the "Love & Logic" that I've been using on him. He's grounded from friends and everything now, so this weekend he can't go hang out with friends at all. I'm trying on my end to nip this as quickly as possible, because it was like an overnight change! The thing that does concern me is since he's been testing all boundaries my doctor told me my blood pressure was elevated. I'm not surprised to hear this, because I swear I can feel it! I don't think my son realizes that if he continues this way he may just end me without realizing it until it's too late. I feel like I've done everything and tried everything. That's why I feel like I'm getting to the end of my rope.

If you are really sensitive, please don't read. I haven't been on for a while again. When I get depressed, or I have another TIA, my kids sense it, and they take advantage of me being in a weakened state. It gets very discouraging at times. I can't stop the TIA's from happening, so there are times when I feel like a less adequate mother to my kids. My son just turned 13, so he thinks he knows best, and he thinks he knows everything about everything. He has lately been yelling at me, defying me, and ignoring request's to help out around the house. It's been pretty bad around the house lately in every way possible too. I don't feel happy, I have a really bad sinus infection which caused me severe migrane headaches, I still have the TIA's, we recently lost a dear family friend that passed away, I'm really depressed right now, my kids constantly fight, the house is out of control, and there are days where I honestly wish Heavenly Father would've just taken me with a really severe stroke. I know that may sound horrible, but that's how I truly feel. I don't know that anyone would have advice, or anyone that can relate to my situation. I'm so worn down from everything, and I just don't know how much more I can handle or take. I'll admit that two nights ago my son had gotten so bad that I yelled right back, this is something I've tried not to do, because I wasn't treated very well growing up by my parents, and I don't want to be a horrible parent to my kids. I just had taken my son's verbal abuse for so long that I exploded from holding it all in. I'm still exhausted from being sick, and I've had two TIA's within this last week. Each TIA seems to take more energy from me. If you all are wondering if I have family members who could help out I do, but our counselor has ordered that my parent's not have any contact with my kids. My parent's have been pretty bad to my kids and I, so they are NOT an option in all of this. I just don't know which way to turn, or how to handle things around here. I feel like I'm wasting space, and that my kids would be better off without a disabled mother. I don't know what else to say than that. LSL

Hi Lydi, Next month will be my 13 year anniversary. I won't say the road has been easy, because we all go through ups and downs, and different emotions along the way. How are you doing now? I hope things are improving for you. Doctor's never told me what to expect, and I've found so much more support and information on here than anywhere else. Hang in there. Some days I had to take things one day at a time, and sometimes it's more like one minute at a time. Keeping busy helps get your mind off of the things that bother you. My cat helps me tons. Animals are very therapeutical. Also on the sleep issue, my sleep pattern's have bounced around a lot! I take diphenhydramine and valerian root. Check with your doctor before you try either of these, but they've helped me to at least get to sleep, or some nights I know I wouldn't be able to sleep at all. So, the unexpected happens, but we keep plugging along. Chin up, k? You're in the right place for support and some answers. LSL