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Everything posted by heathber
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Spring is Sprung... When Life Gives You Lemons Pick a Pretty Bouquet
heathber commented on HostTracy's blog entry in My Journey Within
Great and its something fun to do when you have the oomph that has a useful end result. -
Spring is Sprung... When Life Gives You Lemons Pick a Pretty Bouquet
heathber commented on HostTracy's blog entry in My Journey Within
borrow a sewing machine and make yourself a colourful quilt either for the bed or your couch. I have a lovely one my Aunt made for me that lives in my recliner it's so comforting to snuggle under when watching tv at night, and it brightens up the room. -
That all sounds really positive Tracy, although the arguments about medication don't sound like fun.
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Hugs Sue! Tough times. But knowing first hand how stroke impacts, you already know it's worth taking the risk on the aneurysm surgery. Fingers crossed whenever I can spare them and non faith based prayers for you to find the strength you need for this. love and more hugs -Heather
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I need learn how to be a good caregiver
heathber replied to yesdear20003's topic in Newbie Stroke Caregiver Introductions
Janelle (GreenQueen) is right about helping physically when he really needs it, but also be aware that sometimes we want or need to do things for ourselves. You want to help not take over and sometimes you will need to do the "tough love" thing but take your queue on that from Shannon and his therapists. Learning to ask do you "want" help with that before taking action to help is important. And help him to understand that wanting help and needing help are not necessarily the same thing too. -
What everyone else said. I find I'm spending quite a bit of time with my mother's friends these days. Mostly they are older than me but younger than her. I don't think age matters that much. Enjoy your new besties
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I am such an idiot, simple problem trying to solve & go in circles
heathber commented on HostAsha's blog entry in achandra's Blog
Hi Asha, the main thing is you are out there trying. Yes there's a reason you are no longer in the paid workforce. But despite that you are willing to give it a go. Sometimes writing down the steps as you think of them helps, main thing is don't let it get you down. The more you practice the sooner your brain will rewire for the skill you are trying to get back, but in the process there will of course be times things don't work (probably most times). Keep trying! -Heather -
Very true Tracy, And we have Autumn not Fall as here only the imported trees are deciduous our winters are not usually cold enough that the trees need to "hibernate". Right now it is Summer and I'm living at our family "cabin/holiday house" up in the hills outside Melbourne. Thankfully no drought here like there is further north. But I do have to watch the fire weather warnings and be ready to scamper back to town if it gets too hot and windy. So far the nights have been coldish (5-15 C)(~40-65 F) but the days 25 (that's 80 in your crazy numbers) and up, we had one stinker with a hot north wind and max temp of 43 (~110) So mostly it's been very pleasant although you don't want to be outside between 2 and 5pm the UV is at extreme and sunburn is a given, and if there's a cool breeze or it's overcast you get caught so quickly.
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Tracy another friend here saying It was not and is not your fault or your responsibility. You are in no way responsible for how your birth mother felt long term about her decision about you. And if a funeral happens while you are out of town then again that's not your responsibility or even in your control. Life happens and you do not need to take on their guilt or discomfort about ancient history that cannot be changed. Yesterday is done and you don't get a do over so face forward and take the next step. Living alone is both scary and rewarding. You and kitty are going to have a blast, and yes there will not be a lot of spare cash for treats but living your own life your way is a treat of a different sort. Here's to a fabjoyous 2019 for everyone.
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More HUGS from me too. I do hope it's good news! try not to worry about it until you hear results but that is so hard. -Heather
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Oh Pam, just what you don't need but you will get through this hurdle too So hard to find a partial solution and then to have to go back to waiting and with a new worry on top of it. HUGS
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The sing talk thing is backed up by research. You connect into the speech center of the brain via a different path when singing than you do when talking. With training it can be used as a way to work around aphasia. I guess you have to think about what you want to say rather than how to say it. It might be worth a try.
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That is such great news Tracy. Having your Mom help with the money and planning is a good idea. I do hope you can get your own place now!
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oh yes I'm a member of that club too. Just do what feels right for you. It can be nice to have a male friend, it doesn't have to be more than talk
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Start at the beginning and put one foot in front of the other. If it becomes an income stream that's wonderful but enjoy the scenery along the way too.
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I Am Struggling With Something I Don't Like About Myself
heathber commented on HostTracy's blog entry in My Journey Within
So pleased for you Tracy. It's a huge step forward. Other people can't read your mind! and allowing yourself to ask for help is not an imposition on others. I wish I could get my Mum to realise that! She is going blind (macular degeneration) and still won't ask for help when she needs it. I thought I was bad on that one but it turns out I'm only a minnow compared to her. -
you are a "bad man" Deigh I'll take my filthy mind elsewhere now.
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Well done you! that lifting rule is so easy to forget if you aren't lifting regularly, look after yourself. It is sad that she didn't make it, but you all did your best and if it was her time it was her time. I am so glad that your confidence has been boosted rather than sapped as it easily could have been by an event like this.
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hi Deigh both links work and that looks like a very sensible solution
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Massive HUGS to you It's such a pity that we have to fight for things that should just happen automatically
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All perfectly understandable though. Your step mom shows all the indications of pathological hoarding so she isn't going to throw anything away as she feels that the memories are the things. She will need to want to change and get psychological help before anything does change so yes "let it go" is your only hope. She doesn't really want you to touch anything or to "help" so hopefully your can move out soon and leave her to it. Fingers crossed for the disability hearing
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So pleased that you are at peace with his passing and are moving on with the things you wanted to do. It can be such a hard transition. Hugs -Heather
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I Am Struggling With Something I Don't Like About Myself
heathber commented on HostTracy's blog entry in My Journey Within
Very true Tracy. Sometimes people don't realise/see others needs unless/until you ask. Especially if you haven't asked before, and they think you have everything you need where you are. -
Feeling so Blah...Physically, Mentally, and Emotionally
heathber commented on HostTracy's blog entry in My Journey Within
Of course Pam! Crazy Cat Ladies unite! how many cats we actually have is about how many cats are compatible with our living arrangements/abilities, not how many we want. -
Hi Pam enjoy what you have now for as long as it lasts no point in borrowing trouble you have plenty without that 😘