HostTracy

Staff - Stroke Support
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  1. I am so excited to say that I am going to the river with my mom, step dad, sister and her new husband. We are staying at the lake house and I am so excited just to get out into some fresh air and quiet. Hubby and daughter have to work. I have never been able to go on the kinds of small getaways because I worked like a mad wo man. We get to get out on the river in my sister's pontoon boat and a bit of tanning for me! YAY!!!!! I'm just so excited I had to share.
  2. As I went along my weeks of therapy I didn't even miss occupational therapy. It honestly was just my anxiety...change. I worked harder in Physical Therapy and got my daily walking up to 25 minutes per day (doesn't seem like a lot but for me it was a milestone) I was balancing better than ever, doing the challenge courses all set up so much better. I was feeling good. That is when Barbie told me we were going down to one day per week instead of two. Again, there goes my anxiety when I should feel really good that I am doing well. Once again in speech therapy I was a crying mess. No matter that I knew it was a triumph it came out as anxiety and tears. This was December 2015 and I left that day ready to take on and accept my new changes. This was sometime in the middle of the week and on Friday, Adrian and I were driving my daughter down to her Meme's Christmas Party. Her dad would be there and she had not seen him since she was 15 (18 last year) and she was a bit upset and nervous so we decided we would stay close in case she needed to leave a bit early. It was dark when we began driving (remember I don't do so well in the dark and we had already realized that physical therapy was really not changing that). It started raining as we got out of Nashville. We were headed south for about an hour to get where we were going. My anxiety was already raised due to dark and now the rain and then all the sudden the rain came down so hard that I couldn't see anything in front of me and it sounded like bullets hitting the windshield. I closed my eyes and covered my ears and then started having a very very bad panic attack. We had to pull over at the first exit we saw and drove into a lighted covered area at a gas station. I could not stop...I was inconsolable, I couldn't remove my hands from my ears and every word that came out was stuttered over and over and over again. I finally got myself to stop crying and laid my seat back and just closed my eyes until we could make it into town. We dropped my daughter off and Adrian took me to Quiznos for a sandwich. I wouldn't get out so he went in and got us something to eat and we just went and parked in an empty but lit parking lot. After eating, I just laid my head on his shoulder and cried myself to sleep. Once we arrived back at her Meme's party I went in (Mistake#1) to get her because I had to use the restroom. My ex was there right as you come in the door....I had just met his new girlfriend who has a 1 year old (not his) outside and as soon as I tried to say a word (I was trying to say I have to use the restroom) all I could say is I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I and I stood there bawling and sucking in my breath between wails. I freaked everyone out. My ex mother-in-law came over and hugged me and took me away from the excitement in the living-room and I got out that I had to use the restroom. I quickly did and excused myself and Hailey soon followed. From that moment I stuttered non stop for almost 2 months...
  3. It perplexed many of my therapists Sue. That when the sun goes down my deficits are 3 times worse. Because I had a stroke in my cerebellum it didn't work to balance my body. Balance happens in the cerebellum so I learned to compensate by using my eyes...that is one part of balance. So when the sun goes down I see less. In fact if you take me out to the country at night I can see only for so far and then it fades to nothing. It actually took me a long time to help them believe me. It was a new thing for them too. Weird huh?
  4. The first time I really knew my emotions were completely not momentarily fried was the day my OT said "Ok Tracy this is our last day together.". She took me out into the hall where numbers had been taped at different heights and out of order. I had to walk down the hall and name the numbers without moving my head. I also had to go down straight headed and pint to the numbers she asked me to. When we were all finished she proceeded to scold me. "Tracy looks like there was a bit of cheating you were supposed to keep your head straight.". I thought I had done well but apparently not. I went on to PT and tried not to think about OT. My PT coach had by then figured out that dusk and dark give me the hardest time. So we went into an office and she closed the doors and turned off the light. I froze. I was completely blind. I tried to follow her voice but body just was not sure how to navigate. I bumped into a chair and holding on to it I finally found the wall and followed the wall to the corner. Where I felt her trying to give me stability as she perched me atop that evil balance ball. I then had to balance on that in the dark. I was overwhelmed and tears just flowed quietly. I did my best and it took only a couple of seconds before I felt I was going toward some other place that wasn't balanced. Over and over again. We did a full hour in the dark of different types of balance stances. I had cleared my tears and humbly walked myself out and over to speech therapy. My speech therapist had already turned off her lights and had her blinds down and shut (dark but some light could peek through). She closed the door and I completely absolutely lost it. M<y tears were no longer quiet and I stuttered IIIII dont dont dont know know know know why why why why IIIIIII am am am am am cry cry crying so so hard. I was a mess and just couldn't talk anymore she immediately turned on the lights and pulled up her blinds and sat down next to me and just hugged me. "Tracy what happened?". I explained to her that OT said I was done and Barbie was torturing me in the dark and i was losing my mind. I told her I wasn't even sure why I was upset over OT she never really worked with me much anyway. I know I should have spoke up sooner about my darkness issues but I didn't want the feeling of regressing to a toddler who still can't stay upright. It's humiliating. This is a great example of how therapists and doctors talk and say the things that you haven't yet. Bonnie ST decided I had enough pushing for the day and we just did something fun the rest of the hour. The next few times at therapy my PT turned off the lights but kept the door half open so I had some light flowing in and she only did a half hour of this and then we switched to full light strength stuff. The ST also turned off her lights but kept the blinds down but not closed and woud do about 30 mins that way too then would switch to light again. It took several weeks to get back together. I was depressed but I soon made myself endure. We began to push again...
  5. Thank you Asha thank you for your insight!!! Tracy
  6. I think maybe I didn't have a tremendously hard time in that area a lot of my deficits were timing , coordination, set shifting, memory, and higher learning cognition. I probably just stumped her. I have heard even from you that occupational therapy helps tremendously. I ciould make the toast maybe but couldn'y stand up to do it and would forget to get outor forget to turn it on, those kind of things lol. Sue I appreciate your support and I really feel for you with being right there watching your husband climb his way up and as he did another landslide would happen. I know you were such a blessing to him. Tracy
  7. For quite a few months I engaged in therapy every week: Occupational, Physical and Speech therapy. In occupational therapy she was frustrated I think. We didn't work on a whole lot. She seemed very absent. Physical therapy was really helping me. Simple exercises for most people without a stroke but challenging and helpful to me. My balance issues were pretty bad, I sometimes couldn't feel where I was in space, and just walking with my legs together was ridiculous. Where I had my stroke, the cerebellum, is not where these actions come from in the brain rather it is an area that helps in coordination, precision, and accurate timing of the impulses coming from other area in the brain. An example would be balance: the cerebellum helps you to stand upright, keep your balance and move around. Sorta helps your muscles move smoothly so that you can stand and walk or anything you want fluidly. We worked on strength with a lot of lying down exercises first we later added in the bicycle, some other push with my legs and you go up thingy, and the treadmill which was disastrous so we waited on that one for a long while. I graduated from the mushy square to a balance ball it terrified me. The first day I tried it I made it about 10 seconds with my eyes open and about 3 seconds with my eyes closed (I didn't like my therapist that day....of all the things to ask me to get on that beast and then close my eyes :Tantrum: ). We added new things each week and I worked at home too and added new thins each week to what I was alreadt doing. Speech therapy was many things too. We made a medication chart so I could make sure I checked medicine and knew I was taking everything. We played games, We talked about different ways of remembering then practiced those ways using worksheets, games, and a lot of repetition. I was getting very used to my weekly schedule and for the first time I could feel a sense of normalcy at least at the moment...
  8. I so understand that. I mean my Doctor says that is the #1 thing to focus on: not having another stroke. I really do the best I can do which is everything. Without finding a cause to why I really have nothing in particular to make sure I always focus on that. It's hard sometimes...but I am scared to death of ever having another. I'm so sorry your husband faced multiple ones. I do consider myself blessed at this point. It must be so hard to see your husband go through such trauma. hugs.. Tracy
  9. I feel that frustration Sue. My hospital was a stroke trained hospital with recognition and they stopped at the CT with no neurological exam. It upsets me especially when I told my daughter it was something big either a heart attack or a stroke and she relayed that to 911. I got to the hospital less than one hour after I collapsed. I think the hospital failed me. With the kind of stroke it is hard to tell but a neurological exam could have diagnosed it and MRI would have confirmed it.
  10. Before I started therapy I ha a multitude of test. EEG, CT Angiogram, Echo-cardiogram with bubble study, Zio Patch for 2 weeks...I had so much blood drawn it was like 10 vials! I was freaking out because I was severely anemic and I thought to myself I don't have much blood to spare Lady. My Anitcardiolipin was checked, CBC, BMP serum or plasma, Factor V Activity plasma, Lipid panel, Von Willebrand Factor, Anti-Thrombin III Antigen, Protein S activity, Protein C activity, TSH, CMP, Total Iron Binding Capacity, HBA1C...I don't know what most of these are I'm just copying my report. Either way I have never had so much blood taken away. Every test they did came back Negative. Her answer to that was we do not know...a Cryptogenic Stroke. I didn't like that answer. I wanted to know. I needed to know. What do I do now? I was left with a lot of lingering questions and anxiety. I started therapy in September last year...Occupational, Physical, and Speech Therapy. One of the first things I had to do was remember their names. My speech therapists taught me how to remember by association. I have done this plenty of times but it was like I had to start all over. Like being a child going to kindergarten. My therapists were all very nice and supportive. I din't share my associations except with my speech therapist because they were mine and I didn't want to use something that might bother them. Jill was Occupational therapist and she was sometimes in a weird mood ( she had a lot going on at home I found out and a husband who had MS so it affected her) but I remembered her name...ILL Jill. Barbie was my Physical therapist...Barbie Doll. Bonnie was my speech therapist...Bonnie and Clyde. I also had an assistant speech therapist doing an internship but I have sadly forgotten her name and how I used to remember it. Three days a week for 3 hours each of those days. I was prescribed a cane and began learning balancing exercises in physical therapy. The first day I stood on that squishy square I couldn't do more than a few seconds with out just about collapsing. I was given homework therapy to do in between visits. I don't remember much of occupational therapy except my therapists trying to tell me that childcare might be a great place for me to start. I was baffled and speechless. I finally got out that childcare is one of the noisiest active places I have ever worked so envision myself falling and then crawling under a table and covering my ears and crying. Her and I didn't do very much together. It was a disappointment but I focused a lot on physical and speech therapy. One of the first things my speech therapists did after her evaluation was introduce me to association memory. We did pretty elementary work sheets which I had difficulty with. I cried a lot. But over time this started to help me a lot...
  11. Scott I'm really happy that you found something like this.I agree...what an oppurtunity to help maybe yourself but also many others. I applaud you! Keep letting us know. Thank You Tracy
  12. When I got home I really don't remember very much. I still had no diagnosis and life was still going to go on...bills, eating, using the restroom, period (this has been a real problem health wise), being alone, just surviving. I was helped to my bed and all I remember for the next week is my daughter who graciously made me something to eat and gave me snacks and drinks which lay on the bed next to me. I ate but I don't remember it. I do remember having to use the bathroom which was a potty seat close to my side of the bed. I couldn't walk without falling but I could hold on enough to just get there and sit down. I had started my period again in the hospital and it was really really heavy and I really don't know how long it lasted that time. Right before I had the stroke I had a month and a half long extremely heavy period which left me extremely anemic and 0 iron stores. (I took iron supplements per my Doctors orders). I can only remember bits and pieces which is probably good. The 2 weeks that followed were hell. I needed to sleep almost all the time, I couldn't talk very well, I still was throwing up at least once or twice an hour, the sound of the television was like torture, the lights couldn't be turned on because it bothered me so much I couldn't stand it, and my head hurt so bad. Every night my daughter I think would fix me something to eat. My daughter made an appointment with my primary doctor and my husband and daughter took me. All I could say was "Something is wrong...you know me Dr. _____ something is wrong with me. Something happened." He looked me over and Adrian and Hailey proceeded to tell him about what was going on. The first thing he did was test my reflexes (knee) and my leg shot up so far and it wouldn't stop going back and forth. My Doctor stopped my leg and immediately told all of us I needed to see a Neurologist as soon as possible. The appointment was made and we went as soon as we could. The Neurologist did a neurological examination and then after thinking for a moment she asked me to walk holding on to the wall up and then back down the hallway. She asked my daughter did I always walk like that not the imbalance but the way my feet were wide apart and the I waddled. It was not normal to her. So I was sent for an MRI which I had that week. I wouldn't get the results until I went back to see my Neurologist. It was a month. My mom came too along with my daughter and my husband. The Neurologist was hesitant, she asked had I fallen since before I felt that way. My answer was no and then she told us that I have had a bilateral cerebellar infarct. She said there is no evidence of prior TIA or Stroke but this was a large completed stroke. I just started crying. I couldn't stop. I had to go to another area and have a heart monitor placed that would stay there for about 2 weeks. She also ordered a BUNCH of tests. She said she would be calling me to set up therapy as soon as possible. She held my hand and said "I'm so sorry that you had to find out this way...but I will do everything I can to get you the right care. It's going to be ok.". It didn't feel ok. I was really scared...
  13. Thank you Lin and thanks to all of you for encouraging me to continue I think it's very therapeutic. Tracy
  14. Pearl you are very welcome I'm glad you've enjoyed reading them. It helps me as well to go back and read for the same reason. I can gauge better how far I've come. If it can encourage you then all the better. Thank you so much for your comment you guys have all been so supportive.
  15. This is a copy of what happened when I had my stroke that I posted in my introduction. It is the beginning a new journey. I had a Cerebellar Stroke on July 5, 2015 at 11:30 pm on my bedroom floor. I was 43 and the stroke was on both sides of my cerebellum. Since that day it has been a roller coaster that started with the tallest, most scary drop and loop you can imagine. I've been begging for months to get off and it never stops just slows down. When the stroke happened, I just collapsed. I thought "oh I've fallen let me get up...but I couldn't. ​When I tried to pick my head up everything started spinning and I immediately started to throw up. I couldn't speak really... just moaned. My 19 year old daughter thankfully in my room and asked if I was ok. She told me all I would do is moan and she realized I was throwing up violently. I am blessed that she is a nursing student. She asked should she call the ambulance and I actually said no lol...but I didn't remember that. This is what I remember: I felt like I had the largest magnet in the world on the left side of my head and it was attracted down. Not to anything specific just down. I felt that if the floor was not there I would just keep going down to the left forever if that makes any sense. My daughter called 911 and I told her finally that something really bad was happening. That it was a heart attack or a stroke and I began to tell her everything I was feeling as quick as I could. "I can't get up. Everything is on the left. My head and my eyes are in severe pain. I can't stand the light. I can feel my fingers going numb and I feel my esophagus going numb it's moving up into my throat." At this point I really felt like I was going to die. In between throwing up I managed to tell my daughter that I loved her and that I am so proud of her. I figured if I am going to die here on my unvacuumed bedroom carpet, that I would tell her as much as I could so she could tell the 911 operator before I was unconscious. The first thought after that was telling her how much I loved her. The 911 operator told her to have me chew on an aspirin and the ambulance was on the way. As I threw up the vomit was so thick it was like a log (lol I know this is TMI but this is my experience). I kept thinking that I need to continue throwing up but that I was going to suffocate from what was coming out. So I had to push my head backwards away from the vomit as it happened...because it refused to come out away from my body. My daughter (again I am truly blessed) continued to comfort me and do everything the 911 operator told her. She took my blood pressure. She scooped away the strange alien vomit. She was as calm as a breeze rustling the leaves on the trees. A few minutes later and there were EMT's walking up to me. "Ma'am what's wrong tonight? Can you stand? You are going to have to try hard to help us. (there was very little room in between the bed and the wall) I no longer could speak. I summoned every bit of energy that I could to help the EMT's get me up and with one on each side walking we made it to the ambulance. "Ms. Miller you don't look very well can you tell us what happened?" I could not respond. "What did you eat tonight?" I weakly told them Taco Bell. I could hear them trying to make light of my answer with a few laughs. "That must be it." I began to start throwing up again and one of the EMT's said "Oh not on the floor not on the floor we just cleaned the ambulance. Just throw up on yourself." That is the last thing I remember until the next day. After a CT and less than 48 hours later I was sent home undiagnosed, with a possible migraine or inner ear problems, a walker, a potty seat and a prescription for migraine medicine. It was a month and a half later when I was told by my Neurologist that I had had a large completed Cerebellar Stroke on both sides. I cried. I knew my world would never quite be the same again. Today I am functioning pretty well. Thankfully I can now express myself with comfort... you might not ever know I had a stroke. The majority of the many problems I am left with are not seen by others except my family. Along with balance issues I spend my time trying to find things that make me feel happy inside. Whether or not I am successful depends on the day but thankfully I do have many successful days. I am really glad that I found a place to share with others. Even though I am far from being alone I do feel lonely some times. I have really enjoyed reading some of your own experiences and look forward to reading many more. Thank you
  16. Scott I can promise you that you are not boring I don't know if I know anyone who is. Like I was telling Fred 100 is just a number. I really struggled myself with 100 so I would never want anyone to be frustrated at trying, any number is a good number. :P You try whenever you feel you would like to I certainly want judge either way. I'm just curious about people. I like people. Even the ones that think they are boring. (Secret is I'm boring too LOL)
  17. Bucket lists are perfect Fred! I don't want that to sound weird at all but I think that is a perfect way to get to know someone from the inside out. I'll be your cheerleader and 100 never has to be a number that anyone has to post! I was getting pretty sure I wasn't going to think of enough stuff about myself at #30 LOL. Tracy
  18. Sorry for such long winded blogs but I hope some of you learn a bit more about me.
  19. You know that I would love to read your lists even if it takes a really long time to finish. So please please share. I think it will be great!
  20. Deigh I worked as a Customer Service Manager at Harris Teeter which is a grocery store. The month I came back after I broke my fibula in January I think was April. The very day that the news released that Harris Teeter (there were 4 in Nashville) would be closing all the remainder of the stores in Tennessee and Nashville was the only place in Tennessee that had any stores. So all of the Harris Teeter's in Nashville were closed by June 15 of last year. I stayed until the end and did my part. The last two weeks there were just 2 people working in the store each day...the Pharmacist and a manager. So me and about 5 other people. It was boring and I played a lot of cards and watched tv lol. The last week I worked we had half of one aisle just half way filled with product we had condensed from the entire store. This was a big grocery store in fact it has a different grocery store in that building now. Sorry I am rambling...but that is what I was talking about. It was July 5th that I had the stroke the last day the store was open was June 15. Hope this helps a little. Tracy
  21. HostTracy

    oh boy

    Kelli I did the same thing just a couple of days ago. Thankfully it was just a tiny nick. I was trying out my new mandolin...I think I will delegate this job for now. Whew it really hit me that I could have sliced the whole tip of my finger off with the onion. I am really glad you are ok. Dumb mandolin %*^&^ Tracy
  22. Asha I think what you said is very true. I think in a way I feel the same as you. When you can't see past the now or eve see the now then God has a way of opening your eyes. What I am writing right now is memory and I don't feel the same way about myself now...this is just my journey. I struggle with choices a lot and am getting better and better at seeing the now especially the things that touch me inside. Like today I noticed that my potted flower is attracting beautiful yellow butterflies. I really enjoyed watching them go from flower to flower. Thank you. Tracy
  23. Sue you are so very welcome. The first person I might add that needs to hear this and be reminded of my own words is me. I'm great at dishing it but I am determined to get just as good at scooping it up. Tracy
  24. I got inspiration for this blog by reading another blogger's post on his blog and I found it interesting. So here it goes... 1. I'm adopted 2. I grew up in the country in Tennessee. 3. I am afraid of clowns. 4. As a child we found a puppy on the freeway so "Freeway" was his name. 5. I got a baby goose one Easter. He grew up and was named Pretty boy...as an adult he was not nice. 6.My second car was a 1982 Datsun 280 ZX with T-tops...I loved that car. 7. I have two birth marks. 8. When I was little my mom worked three jobs to support my brother, sister, and me after her and my dad divorced. My Aunt and Uncle were like 2nd parents to me...I miss them dearly. 9. My sister and I used to play outside a lot and we are from the country - farm girls - so we found things to do to have fun. We used to pickle Polk Salad stalks and make pies out of the purple berries that grow on the very big stalks (no we never ate them my mom said they were poisonous but we loved to pretend). 10. When I was about 7 I rode a little cow in my uncles tobacco barn...my brother and sister did too. It was like bull riding cause they didn't like it and they bucked so we would see who could ride the longest. As an adult it seems a bit cruel but looking back we treated all of our cows like they were pets...named them, anticipated and named new babies, and they each would still come eat some grain out of our hands if it was offered so I don't feel too bad. No cows or humans were hurt in the process. 11. We had much worse winters when I was little and we would sled down a huge hill on the dirt road in front of our Aunt and Uncles house. No one could get up the hill if there was snow or ice so I don't remember ever seeing a car. My daughter is 20 now but I can't imagine letting her ever do that. Things change don't they. 12. I was really smart in school - all A's and B's...and competitive (quietly) I was determined to make the best grades. 13. A boy kissed me on the cheek in kindergarten and I rubbed my face the rest of the whole day! That was yuck at 5. 14. My school was an old brick school with two floors and grades K-12...when I moved from sixth grade to seventh they had built a new elementary school and instead of all grades it was just 7-12. 15. The first time a boy asked me to "go with him" I said no but he kept coming back and asking me so I said yes and then counted to 30 and proceeded to break up with him. Not one of my proudest moments. 16. My first kiss was with that same boy like two years later and he had braces. Ouch...we really had no idea what we were doing. 17. I'm a Sagittarius. 18. I was a cheerleader in school. 19. I used to draw very well in high school and made a 100 with the exception of one 98 in my art class...I took 2 years and was my teacher's assistant the 3rd year. I still have all of my drawings and plan to one day matte and frame them. 20. I got 2 red roses from a secret admirer in high school. I found out that day when he approached me who it was...a real nerd. At least that's what we used to say. I have been so vain in my youth. I bet he is a millionaire now...a true computer geek and probably the nicest guy you could meet. I know in some way I missed out...I never would have thought it but I have since I've grown up lots of times. 21. I got married when I was 21 and divorced when I was 34. Today I am not actually married...but I have been living in sin as my mother would call it for 10 years and I call him my husband and he calls me his wife. 22. My step-dad is a Preacher. 23. My step-mom's mother is 95 years old (my grandmother) her mom lived to be 101 and I still remember her. 24. My Nanny (my Dad's mom) was a real old fashioned country mom and grandmother. She made the best biscuits that I can ever remember eating, she had a old cupboard with a flour bin on the left and a roll top on the right, she had a vintage washing machine with rollers to wring out the wet clothes and her bathtub did not have running hot water...we used to warm the water in that old claw foot tub with a water heater thing that looked like a an old microphone. 25. I was 5 years younger than my sister and 6 years younger than my brother...I gained a very active imagination once they were "too old" to play with me. 26. Me and 4 of my best friends won the school talent show one year by acting out a self written play called "The Girl Who Got It All". I was the girl and she got all the illnesses she thought anyone else had (hypochondriac). 27. I played Santa in my fifth grade play "Cajun Night Before Christmas" to celebrate our newest classmate. She was from New Orleans and was Cajun. My friends and I had never met anyone like her. 28. I played Santa my 6th grade year to carol to the 4th and 5th graders. 29. I wanted to be an actress. Can you tell? 30. I have had the weirdest luck or lack of when it came to weird illnesses. I grew up (starting at age 5) having these weird tummy attacks that would end up with us going to the ER...I was misdiagnosed more times than I can remember had more lights down my throat than I can remember and ended up getting an ERCP Endoscopic Retrograde Cholangiopancreatography a weird name for a special endoscopy that looks into your bile and pancreatic ducts. The test caused me to have severe complicated acute pancreatitis with pseudo-cysts. I was 18 and came close to death. I still have spells but very rarely...they diagnosed me with some weird hereditary type of pancretitis. 31. I have worked as a preschool teacher in 4 different preschools in 2 states. I got cellulites of the throat at the second school. It's like swallowing shards of glass. 32. I contracted some type of child respiratory bacterial infection that lasted for about a month and a half. I ended up on super high powerful cough medicine and 2 different kinds of inhalers. I would cough so much that I couldn't stop and it would make me throw up every time . Getting childhood illnesses as an adult can sometimes be no joke. 33. I went white water rafting on the Ocoee River. 34. My ex-husband was in the Navy we moved a lot. 35. My daughter cost $25 thanks to the Navy and I got to be a patient at a very nice civilian Hospital. 36. I have been on the ocean on the USS Yorktown CG-48 Ticonderoga class cruiser...a US Naval Ship with Aegis technology. 37. I used to water ski. 38. I went to MTSU as an accounting major which I changed to Psychology. I never finished college because I got married and moved away. :Doh: 39. I've met several famous people mostly Musicians because of where I lived and worked. Kesha, one of the ZZ Top guys, Buddy Miller, Tim McGraw and Faith Hill and their kids, Keith urban and Nicole Kidman, Hunter Hayes, Joyce DeWitt (Janet from Three's Company), and several others. 40. My favorite foods are Italian. 41. I love all pink things. 42. I was the Etiquette Advisor in my sorority 43. I've milked cows, fed chickens, played and made a house in a hay loft, Learned to cook bake and can when I was about 5, anything you can do on a farm with a barn, cows, and chickens. When I was little we drank raw milk (my Aunt filled up her big bucket everyday) we also made whipped cream from skimming the top and made butter. 44. I used to sell Avon, Mary Kay, Home and Garden Party LTD...I was great at buying but not selling. 45. My kitty's name is "Kitty" She is pur white with a pink nose,pink toes, pink lips, pink ears...oh yeah and she is a boy. :blush-anim-cl: I never knew until I took her to the vet the first time. I just can't look at her and think boy. So he has been a she ever since I found her. 46. When I was 19 I packed up my car and moved to Orlando, Florida for the summer to be close to my then boyfriend...now ex-husband. I had no money other than what I used to get there and found a job about 6 days after I got there and stayed with friends of a friend until I rented a room of my own. I stayed for 3 months. 47. I broke my right ankle when I was 6 playing baseball with my brother and sister. Fell on top of a box of broken glass running to go potty when playing outside and sliced my thigh wide open (like 6-7 inches open). 48. I've never lived alone ever. 49. I'm 5'4". 50. My middle name is Darlene. Always disliked it because I thought it sounded very "red neck" LOL. 51. I partied way too much in college. I went to a Frat house 3 to 4 times a week and partied and goofed around. I had that never been away from Mama syndrome. 52. I am notorious at researching anything and everything about medical stuff, science, the dictionary :toothy grin: yep I was teased about that one when I was young by my own step-brother of all people. 53. I make all my red sauce, marinara, spaghetti, red cream sauce you name it from scratch. I can't stand jarred varieties anymore. 54. I've been to New Brunswick, Canada; Bangor, Maine; Ohio; Michigan; West Virginia; Virginia; North Carolina; South Carolina; Georgia; Alabama; Mississippi; Florida; Louisiana; Oklahoma; Texas; Arkansas; Missouri; Illinois; Kentucky; Indiana; Pennsylvania; New York; Massachusetts; Wisconsin; Ontario, Canada and Tennessee. I have lived in Tennessee, Virginia, Florida, Alabama, and Mississippi. 55. I had my first cell phone when I was 34 yeah I was a late phone bloomer. 56. I graduated high school in 1990. 57. Pretty much my whole family lives in Tennessee but my husband is from California (Born in Lima ,Peru...raised in Buenos Aires, Argentina and is Italian) he's a mixture. 58. I don't really watch any sports except Futbol (Soccer) and my favorite player by far is Lionel Messi. 59. I have a phobia of spiders. Well I hate bugs in general but spiders I have flipped my car over. 60. My next door neighbor to the right has two female Pit Bull puppies and my neighbor to the left has a beautiful Husky/German Shepard mix. I love them and they love me. 62. I like to sew and am servicing my Janome so I can sew with my sewing machine rather than just by hand. 63. I like to dig in the dirt. My after stroke project was 2 potted flowers, a potted strawberry plant, 1 pot of mint, and a long container of herbs ( lemon thyme, Italian parsley, basil, and rosemary). 64. I also did a big gardening project... I pulled up all the grass where my shrubs are and hand tilled it with a 4 prong thing, hand tilled in compost, and added a 2 inch layer of red mulch. It was an all month project...but I'm proud of it. I did about 10 minutes at a time and on some days I couldn't at all but I did it. 65. I love taking pictures but I'm pretty terrible at it. 66. I still sleep with a stuffed animal sometimes. 67. I'm fluffy as I prefer to call it. 68. I call my Mom almost every day. 69. I like humor a lot. 70. I still close my eyes and make three wishes when I go under a moving train. (Only if I'm a passenger) 71. My home town has a Mule Day Parade every year 72. My favorite candy is Werthers Soft Caramels...I avoid buying them because I can eat the whole bag in one sitting. 73. I still miss hearing the crickets at night...I never hear them in the city. 74. I'm crafty and I like to make things. 75. As a child I have worked many a garden and grew up eating garden fresh veges all summer and canned or frozen ones all winter. As an adult I have had One vegetable garden for about a month and a half then in one night some type of bug ate 85% of everything because I didn't use some form of pest control. 76. I am silly and love to make up songs with my daughter. We have done it forever. Like one night I sang to the moon because I needed to use the bathroom. It took it off my mind until I could get home. 77. Yes I eat spray whipped cream from a can on occasion :Help: and I have trained a partner in crime...my daughter. Its like 3 times a year ok well maybe 4 or 5. 78. I have one more guilty eating pleasure...soft polenta doesn't sound very guilty but the way I make it is. I do use 4 cups of low sodium chicken stock, boil that then pour in enough polenta to get the consistency I need and then whisk in i stick of butter 1 tablespoon at a time, pour in heavy whipping cream to make it thinner and softer and then add 1/2 to 1 cup of Parmesan cheese. OMG! It is the best, most yummy, most warming and satisfying dish I make. You can do nothing but melt into a smile when you take a bite. This is definitely a once in a while dish. 79. My maternal mother passed away in her late 40's of a massive heart attack and my paternal father passed away I think in his 50's of a brain tumor. I have been telling my primary doctor for years that I have keep up with my health because those are not good odds. 80. I am almost the most talkative person I know. 81. I have a brother, a sister, an adopted sister, 2 step-sister's, 1 step-brother, and a step brother and sister who passed away. Oh yeah and 2 half sisters. I have a big extended family. 82. I love to wash clothes and dry them...that doesn't include putting them away I wish it did so I wouldn't dread it LOL. 83. I am an eternal optimist, a dreamer, philosophical, sensitive, strong willed, motivating, passionate, and fiercely independent person. Even if I am afraid of things inside. An ironic enigma. 84. I have worked in a shoe store, a department store, a drugstore, telemarketing, a grocery store, 4 different daycares, a management company for mentally and physically handicapped adults that live in individual homes, a school and campus for mentally/physically handicapped children, an optometrist office, part time in a manufacturing distributing company for boots, and as a tax preparer. 85. I grew up going every single weekend or any other extended time to the river... boating, camping, skiing, swimming, tanning, having group fish fries and shrimp boils, fishing, playing in the dirt, exploring, whatever you could do at the river. River Rat. 86. I am usually soft spoken, patient, kind hearted, and love everyone but I can be mouthy, stubborn, loud, and fluff my feathers sometimes. 87. I love lilies. In my potted flower pots that flanked each side of my porch this year there is Catherine Woodbury Day lilies, bright green sweet potato vine on each side and purple wave petunias all in the middle and pouring over the sides. 88. I have been known to be a bit of a dare devil or not afraid to try things. I have ridden so many roller coasters I can't even tell you how many or what kinds, been white water rafting, swung out of trees into water, dived off the tallest diving boards, been target shooting with my Dad, played chicken while skinny dipping in a rock quarry at night, had a gigantic albino python wrapped around my neck while taking pictures with a wrestler and many other things. These may not seem dare-develish to some of you but for me it was. :crazysmile: 89. I am now filled with anxiety if I have to enter a mall. This sucks. :Rage: 90. My car is a red Nissan Versa. 91. I have long hair (brown) that needs a serious cut and color (for those little gray monsters). 92. I wear dentures. Yep it's a secret and now you know it. 93. I drink my one cup of coffee every morning with Italian Sweet Cream creamer. mmmmmmmm 94. I like to read...I haven't been able to get through with a book since the stroke. I like books I can hold but I think I am going to break down and get a Kindle Paperwhite. 95. I am sorta by myself in the friend department right now. I have my husband, daughter, and extended family but I miss having friend time. It's a little of lots of reasons I had a stroke, which causes me to walk funny and talk funny sometimes, I forget names and words, I have emotional lability which can be enough reason, I have sinful amounts of anxiety, don't like loud noises, don't like movement, don't like bright lights, and I just never hear from them anymore. This sucks too. :Rage: 96. This has taken me like 3 days to finish. I honestly think I don't know a lot about myself lol. 97. I wear my hair in a ponytail almost everyday. 98. I am not anemic for the first time in a year and a half! :bow: :kicking: 99. I think I can make friends here. 100. I wear a size 8.5 shoe and sometimes a 9. NEVER ANY HEELS! They are evil.
  25. We moved into the house in February of 2014. I retrieved all the vital things out out of their box homes and began to fill my new little abode that was heaven sent. Before we actually moved into the home we (Myself, my Daughter, my Husband, my Mom, and my Step Dad) wiped down all the walls and baseboards and then painted the two bedrooms. My daughter picked out her color(a beautiful bright lavender) and I picked out our bedroom color (Sandstone) and we brightened up the rooms quite a bit. We painted all the baseboards and molding a bright glossy white. Our bathroom was repainted a deep Taupe. We felt a breath of ease sleeping that first night in our own beds for the first time in three months. My job was a pretty high paced demanding one. I did lots of things on a daily basis. One thing that was hard for me was the inconsistency in the hours each week. At least 2 days per week I did the accounting office. I had to be at work at 5 am on those days. The remainder of the 3 days I would have one of three different shifts (morning 6 am-2:30 pm) (mid shift 11:30 am-8 pm) or (night 3:30 pm-Midnight). This varied every week and each week was a different schedule. So to say the least this was pretty hard on my body and mind. We also only had one car at the time and used it to get me back and forth to work and my Daughter back and forth to school and for whatever else we needed to do away from home. My husband (remember he is not working) is sort of old fashioned...he is from Argentina and is Italian. By the way he is a great cook. I was the one who did everything though laundry, dishes, cooking, cleaning, planning, changing sheets, vacuuming, dusting...you name it I did it except for chauffeuring me and my daughter around he did that as well as work on the car, carry heavy things, be protective. For me it was a lot of responsibility. At work myself and my manager were responsible for passing with the highest numbers we could on our LP audit every quarter. We also managed the front end...each cashier, customer service and the clerks, baggers, the flow of customer traffic, lots of paperwork, the schedule, interviewing, hiring, firing, ordering supplies, making sure the bathrooms were clean always, floor sweeps (baggers), leaving only 5 or less carts that are not corralled in the parking lot at any given time, ensuring there were never more than 10 carts on the lot at any given time, answering non stop phone calls, overseeing issues with customers, registers, time management, and knowing our bottom end for the day and where we were at the hour so we could know when to call more people or send people home. There is so much more but I just can't remember all of it. Anyway I was stressed. REALLY STRESSED. My body was always hurting, and I would get sick often (I would work through unless I were basically collapsing because every hour I worked meant money we need to use.). I had a lovely pink home to come to every night but my stress began to just grow. I never made it to unboxing everything so we had a whole half a living room stacked with boxes. I just couldn't find the energy. My stress was beginning to be really out of hand but I didn't go to the Doctor. I don't have the money for a Dr.'s appt. so I would tell myself just to push through. All year long my stress and anxiety grew exponentially...by Christmas I was just depressed and I didn't do very much to decorate or celebrate...