Stroke Survivor - male
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About PaulNash

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    Associate Mentor
  • Birthday 05/18/1958

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  • Stroke Anniversary (first stroke)
  • Stroke Anniversary (second stroke)
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  1. PaulNash

    I've also gone from being primary (often only) bread-winner to also-ran. I finally earn as much as Linda does now (if you include the disability payments), which is something that we are both still coming to grips with. I'm also getting used to her asking a colleague when she has computer problems, rather than asking me. Mick Jagger: "Time is on my side". That's the one thing that has consistently helped mood and function.
  2. PaulNash

    Deigh, what part of SA were you evacuated to?
  3. PaulNash

    My heart goes out to you. I am hoping and praying that he improves quickly and you are able to take him home soon.
  4. PaulNash

    Hi Deigh I was born and raised in South Africa, met my wife and got married there. We travelled a lot, and spent 3 years in Canberra while she tackled a PhD. We moved to Canada after we had children; we lived on a farm and things were getting really scary (gunfire through the nights, neighbours be robbed at gun-point) so we moved to Canada. Been here for 16 years now. We still miss SA, have family there and visit from time to time, but moving to Canada was the best thing that we could have done for our children. We lived all over the place when it was just the two
  5. PaulNash

    Executive function issues are a real bummer; I have them in an allegedly mild way, but combined with the memory deficits they make focus really difficult. I have found that keeping a written log of everything that I am doing and why I am doing it helps a lot. Checking with people that I have everything down correct before I start work and then telling people that "I am just checking my log to make sure that we have covered all the bases" before I sign off makes them feel more comfortable and more confident. I work from home most of the time, doing relatively low-grade
  6. PaulNash

    Wow! That is a whole lot on your plate. I really feel for you. And yes, it's not fair. None of this is. Unfortunately, there's nothing much that any of us can do about the event itself. Just how we react to it and to the deficits and emotions that come in its wake. You have already taken the first step (or maybe it's the second, or third, or ...) by signing up for counselling. And one more step by coming here and asking. I'm also all over the place sometimes, but for me things have got easier over time. There are still very very bad moments, but I have found tha
  7. PaulNash

    Wild digression, but apart from the peace and quiet and reflection, I have an extra-special gratitude for churches as sanctuary. In my younger days in South Africa, a large number of our anti-Apartheid protests were held in churches. The government and police were mostly deeply religious, so would never break up a church service, even if spouting sedition and unrest. They'd wait to grad the churchgoers as they left. Because of having a "white" skin, I could usually leave the church and walk straight towards any senior looking police. The rank-and-file cops would gibe way, assum
  8. PaulNash

    Tomas, my heart goes out to you. Please don't blame yourself; things are clear in hindsight, but not that clear at the time. Grieve for your mother and for yourself, but don't blame yourself. You found her and you got her to the hospital. That is important, and it is important to remember that.
  9. PaulNash

    Churches have always been haves of peace and calm in during troubling times.
  10. PaulNash

    I'm really sorry for you. My father died quite young (I have out-lived him) and I remember being quite devastated by his death, with no real outlet. I can only offer my sympathy, and the knowledge that there are people out here who care. You must have loved her very much.
  11. PaulNash

    I'm all over the place. One of the joys of memory impairment is that some of the time I forget about COVID-19, and things feel normal (well, as normal as they have been since my stroke). My generalized anxiety has gone sky-high. I often feel gloom and despair about the present and the future; keep wondering what is going to happen to family, friends and the population generally before the is an effective vaccine. My youngest is due to go back to school soon, and I am scared witless about what might happen, both to him and to the rest of the family. And of course the
  12. Thea I feel for you. I've see the impact that my (relatively minor) stroke has had on my family. In my case, it gets easier over time, but anger still surfaces from time to time, at varying intensities. My first year was the worst, and it gets easier as time marches on. I don't blame the ER doc who missed the stroke on day one (she did the right things), but I did and still do resent the situation. However, I have been able to spend less and less energy on anger and resentment as time goes on. It flares up, but fades away faster. This place
  13. PaulNash

    Having see what my wife lived through with my (relatively mild) stroke, you have my sympathy and admiration. What you are doing is NOT easy, and change can be slow. I don't have any sage advice or works of wisdom, just a few observations/ It gets better and easier over time. Not always (there are patches when it gets worse), but overall it gets better. Acceptance and coping strategies lead to improved mood. Get a support group if you don't have one already (friends with shoulders to cry on, who will commiserate with you and support you when it all feels too much).
  14. PaulNash

    My medical connections are making their plans based on 3 years until a vaccine is developed, tested and approved and in production. They are obviously being conservative, and I hope that they are wrong, but I'm certainly not holding my breath either. At least Canadians are mostly compliant with distancing; face-mask use seems a tad erratic.
  15. PaulNash

    Hi Greg; I also had a vertebral dissection. That artery is prey much closed off, apparently a small amount of blood still gets through, but not enough to make a difference. The neurologist at the time would have been happier if the dissection was entirely closed off, to minims the chance of more clots breaking free (no moving blood to take them anywhere). The two vertebral and the two carotids feel into the circle of willis , which loops around the base of the brain and feeds a bunch of other arteries that feel the brain. Apparently, losing any one of them is no biggie. I've b