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Stroke Survivor - male
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About PaulNash

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    Associate Mentor
  • Birthday 05/18/1958

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  • Stroke Anniversary (first stroke)
  • Stroke Anniversary (second stroke)
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  1. PaulNash

    Wow. Glad that you are OK. Must have been a really anxious time, especially the l_o_n_g wait.
  2. PaulNash

    What a great idea! My kids do it unsolicited: "Dad, just give it to me. You are hopeless with this stuff". After 40-odd years in electronics, IT and large networks. Sigh,
  3. PaulNash

    1. Partially blind, memory deficits, fatigue (cognitive and physical), emotional lability, difficulty holding a conversation (especially with multiple participants), perceived weakness of left leg, various itches/tingles/lack of touch, mostly on my lower legs, confusion. 2. Visual defects, itches/tingles/touch, leg, confusion - same Cognitive fatigue, emotional lability - worse Physical fatigue - improved 3. 3 1/2 years 4. Vertebral artery dissection, leading to a shotgun blast of small blood clots through my brain. Hence the funny mix of deficits.
  4. I'd start tomorrow but I get so t_i_r_e_d when I try to write ... And if I made any money on it, the insurance would cut me off 🙂
  5. PaulNash

    Bright young things in computer stores are the absolute pits to deal with. I've spent more years that I care to remember designing and administering computer systems and networks. I'll go into the local Best Buy or equivalent looking for a specific type of cable, and some pimply-faced "associate" will give me a thousand words about why I am wrong, need a different cable, cannot connect the devices, need to replace everything, and so on. There is only one solution -- direct violent physical action :-). It's a common language that even the kids in computer stores understand 🙂
  6. PaulNash

    Your doctor should have sent you for an MRI and to a neurologist as a minimum. It's not going to cost you or him anything (unless you live somewhere with no hospital). I obviously don't know the whole story, but if I were in your position, I would be furious. Any kind of stroke is a serious event, and apart from checking on what damage there might be, they all need to look at risks of another stroke, and give you advice on how to avoid another. Find a new doctor.
  7. In a perfect world not only would tey be affected by their rules, but they would also get to experience what their insured experience. Plot for a thriller: mad scientist has a stroke, disability insurers cut and stop payout on very dubious grounds, mad scientist creates something that can cause a stroke, starts attacking insurers with it. I'd buy a copy tomorrow.
  8. I had something similar with my disability insurance. I started working part-time (very part-time, about 12 hours/week) after about 3 months. Three months later, my insurers informed me that the had reviewed my case & saw that I had worked for 6 hours on one day in those three months, and was therefore cured and that they were cutting off benefits. We hit them with neuro reports, cog psych reports, the whole nine yards, and made it clear that this would end up in court. They backed down but ended up needing the whole battery of tests just before each anniversary so that they could "fully evaluate my stroke". I wanted to report them to the local medical regulatory body, as they were diagnosing a core without even having seen me. If there were doctors on the panel, they should have been struck off, and if non-doctors they should have been fined/jailed/whatever for acting as doctors. Too much bureaucracy and too much paperwork, so I ended up dropping the whole thing, but am *still* *beep* off about it, and trust my insurers about as far as I can throw their building (ie. not at all).
  9. PaulNash

    Do you have a neurologist (or even a family doc) to discuss this with? Did you go to the ER when you had the stroke, and if so, did they give you advice? This is a pretty knowledgeable group, but you are probably best served by getting advice from a stroke neurologist. paul
  10. PaulNash

    You can celebrate and be sad at the same time. Linda and I just had out 30th anniversary, which was quite emotional. While neither of us wanted my stroke, or would have wanted any of the effects, we are still both glad that I survived, impairments and all. Compared to most of us, I got off lightly, but the stroke (3 1/2 years ago) still had a major impact on our lives and our relationship. There is a lot that we both miss, but we are slowly re-building a new life together on the foundations of the old one. It is not easy, but it is worth it. We still celebrate the fact that I survived, and that my impairments are as "mild" as they are, while mourning what we have lost at the same time.
  11. PaulNash

    You have my sympathy. I cannot imagine what you must be going through. My wife (who is also my primary caregiver) had quite a battle just coming to grips with the fact that I will never be the same, and that she now has to take responsibility for a lot of stuff that used to me mine. She is also now the primary breadwinner, which is a turnabout that she is not happy with. My impairments are nowhere near as bad as many on this board. What has worked for us is that she has forced me to re-take responsibility for many aspects of my life, plus to take responsibility for some aspects of our joint life. It has not been easy for her, and not been easy for me, but she has pushed me to make decisions, first small, then bigger, then really important. Her trick, I suppose, was to put me in a position where I *HAD* to take responsibility for something, even if it was small and unimportant. It took some time before I was comfortable doing that, but then she could start pushing me to be responsible for bigger decisions. Maybe try to find household chores that your wife can do (even if just choosing what to eat for dinner) and build from there. The difficult part is figuring out how to make her take that responsibility, hence starting small. And in the meantime, take time to look after yourself. I'm a big believer in exercise for mood issues. Walk, run, cycle, whatever. She'll survive without you for as long as it takes, and the break will probably be a good thing for both of you. And this is *really* important. As you have found, you can't help her if you are in a bad way. And if there is any way to convince her that volunteering will *help* keep you, that would make it easier for her to get out and about. Good luck, keep us posted, and come and unload here. We're here to support you and do anything that we can to help.
  12. PaulNash

    I like the statement; the image really *is* thought-provoking.
  13. PaulNash

    M wife, my family doc and my neurologist all want me to stay on aspirin. My stroke was caused by blood clots from an arterial dissection (which has now closed off), but apparently there is still a risk of clotting elsewhere. I guess that it is cheap insurance, if irritating. Far better than Fragmin (injectable anticoagulant). I was on it for about 6 months (IIRC, which is dubious, given the state of my brain). I self-injected in my stomach, then thighs and buttocks. Looked like a serious junkie with all the injection sites showing as massive bruises because of blood not clotting. Fortunately the cops never stopped me for anything, else I would have been in serious trouble :-).
  14. PaulNash

    The All Blacks might be on top right now (OK, most of the time), BUT South Africa won the game that mattered, immediately after independence/democracy in 1995, when James Small marked Jonah Lomu and kept him away from the action. We won 15-12, Joel Stransky out-kicking Andrew Mehrtens. The only points scored were drop goals but the two fly-halves. This was fictionalised in Clint Eastwood's movie "Invictus" (not bad, but nowhere near as exciting the actual match live). I have no doubt, however, that New Zealand is a *far* better place to live than South Africa.
  15. > no-one forces us to be caregivers, we do it out of love or a sense of duty. I have an enormous admiration for anyone supporting family or friends with a chronic illness, _especially_ anything that affects their brain (stroke, demote, depression, senile decay), and _especially_ over the long term. It shows a level of love and caring that goes far beyond what anyone could reasonably expect. Nonetheless, I still feel guilty about the additional burdens that _my_ injury places on _her_. I'm also very aware of the impact that my loss of earnings has on our finances and our previous plans. This is not to negate your point in any way. Just emotions are not always rational. I was raised in a Calvinist household, so we were all taught to feel guilty from an early age. We were also taught that our role in life was to serve, not to be served, and that being ill was some sort of moral failing. It's hard to shake that sort of stuff. I'm afraid that this is a bit incoherent ...