Janaailene

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Everything posted by Janaailene

  1. Hello wwill! Your final sentence really resonated with me. Thank you for giving my new nightly mantra to me.
  2. hello, Ms Becky, thank you for your perspective and you explained it perfectly. Your words are so helpful and definitely perked me up this morning! My babies need me, my family needs me, and I WILL thrive. I am starting to learn that the mind (i like to call it our "meat computer" 😂) is a powerful organ. It may be a little complex to "restart" it, but it can still be done!
  3. Thank you, Mr Willis, I truly am part of the club we never asked to be a part of 😂 though all of our (everyone in our "club" included) strokes were different, our worlds were completely flipped upside down. Its odd to say, but its nice to say that I'm not "special," we are ALL going through these same trials. Its so nice to meet you, Mr Willis!
  4. hello all, im not sure what to write honestly. I'm really glad I was able to find this forum. I felt really alone for awhile. And I apologize in advance if this is the wrong topic to post in, or if my post is too long 😞 I guess I'll start with my story. On August 2nd 2017, it was about midnight. I was 25 at the time, exactly 4 weeks postpartum holding my newborn son. I was walking to the room that my husband was sleeping in during his break from night duty. As I approached the room, the hallway started to spin and I held the wall, screaming nonesense to my husband. I ended up having a right arterial dissection. I was able to get my son on the bed before I fell. My husband had no clue what was happening, so he called medics. I was in and out of the hospital in 24hrs, had a couple problems with my dexterity and walking, but i was fine? The neurologist at the hospital told me it was caused from a car accident I was in earlier that year. He said it would heal up and id be fine. Great! Don't have to worry about having another one!!!! Wrong. Beginning of March this year, I started having dizzy spells, But they would pass. I figured it was because I hadn't eaten enough that day; at least thats what my husband assured me of. On March 14th, around midnight, I had a left ischemic stroke. The initial right dissection never healed completely, and launched a blood clot into a left artery. Took me 3 days to get to the hospital, thought I had a severe ear infection since I couldn't walk straight and my eye was drooping. I mean, I couldnt have another stroke, right? I was 27, my 28th birthday was in 2 days, my daughter was going to be 1 in a week, my 2 year old son was starting to form sentences, my husband was overworked: I COULDN'T have another stroke. I'm lucky: not one deficiency that didn't clear up. Being 28, fortunately age is on my side. But I'm mentally unwell. Panic attacks constantly, starting about 1 month ago. Not sure why this anxiety started 5 months post stroke? Whenever I dont feel well, like if my head hurts or I'm nauseous at night, I believe im having another stroke. Nights are always the scariest for me, since both of my strokes were late at night. Even though Im seeing my primary neurologist, a neuroradiologist, a hematologist, a psychiatrist and a therapist consistently, i cant shake the feeling that im going to have another one. Theres no surgery to help. Turns out i was born with small fragile vertebral arteries. I can only rely on medication for the rest of my life. I dont mind that; it is what it is. But research says that those with 2+ strokes doubles the risk of dying within the next 2 years. I take all of the medications given to me, same times of the day. I am 20lbs short of a healthy bmi. No drinking, no smoking, nothing. I feel like I'm finally getting my life together, but the panic attacks won't stop. I cant breathe, I cant swallow food. Does anyone have any insight? Please. This is not a sympathy post. Please don't tell me to "buck up" or "get over it": my 26 yr old husband tells me that frequently. I'm grateful for what i have, and im so so grateful to have found you all; im not alone anymore. Do those who've had 2+ strokes have any chance to live? Am I going to see my kids graduate high-school, college, meet my future grandchildren? My grandmother didn't even survive her 2 strokes, the last one killing her at 62. I'm just afraid my clock is ticking too fast and I'm unable to enjoy it.