givincare

Stroke Caregiver - female
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Everything posted by givincare

  1. Vent Away, Sue. That's what we are here for. I am glad you were able to have a visit with a life long friend, you deserve it! Someday I will catch you in chat again . It seems I can never make it on Tuesday nights anymore, and I miss them! Hugs, Kristen
  2. Happy Birthday! I hope have a great day and eat way too much cake! (at least that's the way I'D like to spend my birthday ) Kristen
  3. We miss you too! But I think of you each and every day, look to see if you're "back " yet, and try to keep a positive attitude that, "maybe tomorrow". I think almost everyone thinks about "what could have been" and that just doesn't apply to those of us touched by stroke. Everyone always tells you, "Live without regret" but how do you know what you will regret in the future? I always try to make the right decisions based on the knowledge I have at the time and hope it works out. Sometimes it doesn't. Sometimes I choose the wrong decision. Many times I regret. With stroke or any other circumstance in which you don't have choice to make- it is just handed to you- there is nothing to regret and so there is also nothing to think of as "could/should have been". If it should've been then it WOULD'VE been. Patrick and I were never going to have the lifestyle of our peers. It was never going to be. My life is as it was always going to be- I just didn't know it. I do my best to not daydream at what I thought my life would be like as it only saddens me, and there is no point of missing a life that was never mine to begin with. I continue to try to live without regret, and I still sometimes make the wrong decisions. But there is comfort in knowing I did the best I could at the time. Therefore my life is as it was meant to be, like it or not Now go kill the TELCO people. Kristen
  4. Thanks for the update Sue! I have been patiently waiting for you to be back on line. Could you tell TELCO to hurry up. please??? Patience has has never been my virtue... Kristen
  5. I love fish tacos and desperately need a good white sauce recipe Hint Hint Thanks for your daily blog, I really enjoy reading them! Kristen
  6. givincare

    I did it!

    Great Job, Donna! You rock!!! Even with both hands, putting something like that together gets me so frustrated...instructions never make sense...screws missing... Kristen
  7. givincare

    my engagement part 2

    I just wanted to say CONGRATULATIONS on your engagement!!! Kristen
  8. Jan, I will DEFINITELY give Patrick a hug & kiss from you! Kristen
  9. Sue, When I wrote this I had YOU and others here in mind-not just family: "After trying to decide what I COULD find positive from this day 4 years ago, I realized that I need to celebrate and recognize all the friends and family for the way they have been there for Patrick and I through this whole life change. So, THANK YOU ALL FOR BEING THERE THROUGH THE GOOD, BAD, AND UGLY." What I have not made clear enough is that my family does not come to this website so does not see this blog. When I said THANK YOU, I truly meant it solely for everyone here. I told my "real time" friends and family THANK YOU separately. Love You All!!!
  10. February 16th is the anniversary date of Patrick's stroke. I have never really known how to properly acknowledge this date. On the one hand I feel like it deserves to be recognized. On the other, it's not really something I want to "celebrate". I know some of you celebrate the anniversary, Jean with her "I survived" parties for Don, and Asha combining it with her Valentines day celebration to name a few. I respect that their stroke anniversaries are remembered in a way that is right for them. I just don't personally feel like this is a day for rejoicing. I think back to this day four years ago and remember fear and anguish. I feel like "the stroke" has taken on a life of it's own, that it is a separate entity, and I wish I had never met it. For me to break out the champagne and balloons just seems like giving it more importance, power, and life than it deserves. I had been pondering the upcoming anniversary for a few days, so I asked Patrick how he felt about it. Was it something that should be celebrated, from a survival aspect? Was it something that should be forgotten? He told me he was glad to be alive and proud of how far he has come in his recovery. But as far as recognizing the date, he really felt nothing about it other than realizing it was the day of his stroke. It neither saddened him or gave him reason for celebration. So that is how the day has went. Neither of us saying anything about it either way. I decided a little while ago that while I don't want to celebrate it, I am going to acknowledge it in a couple of ways: this blog is the first. After trying to decide what I COULD find positive from this day 4 years ago, I realized that I need to celebrate and recognize all the friends and family for the way they have been there for Patrick and I through this whole life change. So, THANK YOU ALL FOR BEING THERE THROUGH THE GOOD, BAD, AND UGLY. Kristen
  11. We have all missed you. Figured you were just taking a little break. I am sorry to hear about your friend's passing. Hopefully things will start to get better for you now. Take care, Sue. Love you to bits. Kristen
  12. I would suggest that you give yourself a little time to sort through your feelings and have a talk with her about why you are hurt. Try not to blame her, just share your feelings of hurt and what has happened that led you to feel that way. Try to do it in a way that you can both remain calm and just sort out whats going on. Don't look for a fight, just resolution. Good Luck, Kristen
  13. I am sorry Marie. I can totally relate to what you are going through. Sending you hugs.... Kristen
  14. givincare

    medications

    I hope you and your doctor are able to reduce your medications, I know how much better my husband felt when he was able to eliminate some. Keep in mind the doctor may not want to take you off the seizure medicine because the fact that you have not had a seizure may be an implication the meds are working. I know how important driving again some day is to you and a seizure could derail your goal in a major way. Good Luck!! Kristen
  15. Jan, I have been going to weight watchers for a year and a half and really like it. I made lifetime almost a year ago so I am not so much in the losing phase but in the maintaining. Finding a leader who is able to connect with you makes a big difference. Hopefully your leader will be as amazing as mine. I like to go on Tuesdays as well, so if you ever want to chat about the meeting topics (they are the same no matter where you attend) I will gladly do so. Just know you have a WW buddy here if you find you need some support or just want a "bravo". Kristen
  16. Holidays are a tough time of year for most people, I am sorry you have been having to deal with a cold on top of everything else. Keep taking it a day at a time and you will eventually get through. Best Wishes, Kristen PS I take Zicam at the onset of a cold and I literally have not had a full blown cold in probably 3 or 4 years due to it. It really does work! I know its a day late and a dollar short this time...
  17. So, WHAT DID THE DOCTOR SAY??? (this is my covert way of saying you need to go to the doctor now. Don't wait, don't make excuses. GO!!!!) Kristen
  18. Your mum sounds like a very special lady. You are obviously your mother's daughter. Hugs to you Miss Sue. Kristen
  19. George, Congrats on the progress! Patrick saw an acupuncturist right after his stroke and he was doing so much therapy that it was hard to tell what was working or if was a combination of everything. Who knows, huh??? It would be great if Patrick could start going again in the new year... I guess we;ll see! Thanks for the blog! Kristen
  20. Patrick is ready to put up the Christmas tree as I write. I am wishing that we wouldn't have to drag any of that sh*t out this year. It's not that I WANT to be a Scrooge, it's just coming at a bad time of year this year. Its not like I am surprised, "Whoops, how did Christmas end up in December?" but just this once, couldn't it come in April? So I am trying to create the spirit since I am not finding it naturally in myself. In the past, feelings of Christmas would probably would have been invoked with the thoughts of baking cookies. While I am sure I will still do a little of that this year, I don't want to use food to put me in the Christmas spirit. I am trying to put that part of my life in the "Christmas Past" category. Back to the question at hand: Not to sound fresh but, What can I do to help me get me in the mood? It occurred to me that when I thought about the things I loved about the Christmas season as a child it was all about Santa. Nothing brought the story of Santa to life to a seven year old like Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer, and since I am a bit old to try to sit on Santa's lap I think watching a few Christmas movies may do the trick. I decided to share with you my all-time favorite Christmas movies and a little bit about why I love them. Here Goes! Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer (1964)- I have loved this movie since the dawn of time (I was born in 1970, so for me it IS the dawn of time ) I always loved listening to Burl Ives sing "Silver & Gold" and his voice just IS the sound of Christmas. I was also always fascinated by the way when he moved (he was the snowman) there was snow wakes trailing behind him. Then of course there was Rudolf, and the way the others picked on him made me cry. I didn't have as much sympathy for the elf who wanted to be a dentist though, even then I was able to identify a dork when I saw it. (Ya, I was a bit jaded then, too.) But I over-looked the dorkiness of the dentist and loved every misfit in the movie anyway, even the Bumble, who scared the crap out of me. When I became a mom, this was one of the first videos I bought for my son. He loved it too and watched it any time of year until it finally broke. A Christmas Story(1983)- I remember the first time I saw this movie watching it with my step-dad. He was a child from the same era as Ralphie, the lead character. I have rarely heard him laugh so hard as when he watched this movie, so his laughter added to the overall enjoyment of it for me. Not to take away the quality of this movie because it is so well written I would have loved it had I watched it alone. Jean Shepard wrote the book "In God We Trust, All Others Pay Cash" and this movie was created from one the chapters of his book. He also narrated the movie, and played the guy in the line to see Santa that tells Ralphie, "The line ENDS here. It STARTS there..." . He was also well known for his story telling on the radio and it is rumored that he did most of his radio shows "off the cuff". A Christmas Story is the classic movie that reminds you of every coveted toy you ever wanted for Christmas and the joy of finally getting it. I also loved the way Ralphie's "old man" cursed when he was upset but it kind of sounded like an adult on The Peanuts cartoons. You know he's talking but you can't understand a word. This year marks the 25th anniversary of the movie, hard to believe, huh? Christmas Vacation(1989)- This is the movie that made ME laugh the most because it most accurately represents what MY Christmas' were like. Ya, it is a characature of a family, but there is allot of truth behind it. The stress over dealing with family including the crazy one, the low class one, the idealist, and the diplomat. Sounds like an average American family to me! The pressure of "creating memories", keeping up with the Jones, and the importance of sitting down together for a traditional family dinner. Yep, sums up our house at Christmas. Taking a moment to laugh at the ridiculousness of the pressure we put on ourselves to have everything perfect is what it movie is all about. Watching it reminds me it's okay to just let some things go... The Ref (1994)- I don't know if this is really a "Christmas" movie, as much as it is a movie set during Christmas. I love it for it's biting humor, sarcasm, and overall bitterness. It is not for everyone for sure, but it is right up my alley. Kevin Spacey plays a man emasculated by his mother and Judi Davis plays his passive-aggressive wife. The fights these two have are hilarious in that they are ridiculous to the spectator, but you know you've had the same kind of arguments when no one was watching. The controlling mother in the movie is perfectly played by Glynis Johns (also in Mary Poppins!) and is the recipient of one of the best lines in the movie. It's when Kevin's character, Lloyd says: "You know what I'm going to get you next Christmas, Mom? A big wooden cross, so that every time you feel unappreciated for your sacrifices, you can climb on up and nail yourself to it." I am sure that I laugh so hard at this line NOT because it reminds me of anyone in my family tree or anything... Miracle on 34th Street (1947)- I know there was a remake in 1994, but I prefer the original. The funny thing is, I don't think I had seen the original but only a few years before the remake. I was late to the parade on this one, but better late than never. I found it kind of amusing that it was released May of 1947, not in the winter months. Kind of hard to see myself going to the theater in May to watch a Christmas movie, but its release date obviously didn't hurt it, it was the winner of several Academy Awards, and besides, things were a bit different back then. Movies weren't at your beck and call as they are now and I am sure some theaters didn't get it until Christmas. I bet you didn't get asked if you wanted to super size your popcorn for twenty-five cents more, either. Anyway, this is the movie that answers, "Yes Virginia, there is a Santa Clause"- all you have to do is believe. Natalie Wood was a real doll in this movie too. I always thought she was such a pretty lady growing up and I admired her big brown eyes. (I think because I have brown eyes too and in Hollywood, the standard actress or model was blue-eyed when I was a kid. It was a relief to see someone different- like me!) It was easy to recognize her, she hadn't changed all that much. We own this movie, two versions of the 1947 flick. The black & white and the colorized version. We ALWAYS watch the black & white. It's a Wonderful Life (1946)- Another one I was a little late to the party on. I may have seen it as a kid, but I sure don't remember if I did. That may be because it became so cliche for so many years that the channel was always changed by the hierarchy that was in control of the TV as soon as it came on. Thank goodness in 1998 copyright issues over the film were resolved and the film began playing only once a year, or I may have never seen the dang thing. I am glad I finally did. I now know why it is considered to be one of the best films ever made. It's the movie to watch to make you appreciate the hand you have been given. It's the one that tells you the only thing in life that really matters is the people you love. It's the one that makes you hope every time you hear a bell ring that another angel earned his wings. That wraps up the best of MY favorite Christmas movies. But there are some honorable mentions that I need to put out there as well: How the Grinch Stole Christmas- As a kid for me it was like watching a car wreck- The Grinch scared me to death but I couldn't look away. I always felt the most pity for the dog. But by the end your heart grows bigger for Mr. Grinch. A Charlie Brown Christmas- I LOVED Snoopy as a child and I can remember being 2 years old and throwing a fit in the store because I saw I stuffed "Stoopy" and thought he would die of loneliness if he didn't come home with me. Somehow my mom snuck it past me and was safely under the tree that year. Mom's are great, huh? (I still have him, by the way!) This was MY first "red-rider" experience. Scrooged- I just always loved Bill Murray and this movie was cute. I loved the way the Ghost of Christmas Present kicked the crap out of him and the way the guy Bill Murray's character fired just has a total break down. Tons of cameos and this movie still makes me laugh. I am sure I missed a few. What are yours? Which ones I have I mindlessly forgotten or which ones do I still need to see? Hopefully I will be able to catch a few of these this year. I already feel a bit more in the spirit! Kristen
  21. Kathy, I have been wanting to see the movie, glad you liked it. I have read the book three times (Way of the Peaceful Warrior). I have given it as gifts to at least two people. It has as a great message of "life" regardless of religious beliefs. I wish I had the talent of baking pies! My crusts never turn out well. I know not to overwork the dough, but it seems I am not good at rolling it out. One side is always thinner, or it's too thick, or some other issue. I bought a couple of pies from Perkins this year and they were perfect-lol. Kristen
  22. Hi Wilson! The only way your blog won't be read is if you make it private, otherwise...WE WILL READ IT!!!! Its nice to know you can get something off your chest, vent a little, share accomplishments, and in general share whats going on in your life with others. I hope you enjoy the site and become a regular blogger. We are always excited when new entries are added! Kristen
  23. Sue, I hope to be able to catch you in chat again soon- I miss talking with you! I loved the line in your blog about your looking at your feet in the mud...I do that to often. Thanks for the reminder to look up once in a while. Kristen
  24. givincare

    DSC05386.JPG

    Great photos Kelly, it ould be cool to see more! Kristen
  25. Babs, I am so jealous! Sue, it sounds like you two had a wonderful visit. How nice for you both! I hope you get your computer working again soon, although it sounds like you need a new one. I know "need" doesn't always mean "you'll get". Good luck Kristen BTW, I like the new picture! Lovely as always, you are!