tinker

Hi Sue, Sounds like some good news for Ray-thats wonderful. Your mum is going through her journey and its not always straight. I can remember when Mickey first had the stroke and for a year and half I thought he was coming home-seems everyone else knew he was not-talk about denial. And it was hard getting used to an empty house. This web site helped me alot. But its a precarious place we spouses of nursing home residents. There are not a lot of us around. Usually there are widows and caretakers and we are in between. What I want to say is it is hard getting used to the "alone" thing but there is light on the other side and you will get there. all good things sharon

Sue, Im sorry this cannot be easy possibly one of the biggest things to happen to you. When they told me Mickey could not come home--it was surreal. It only made sense to me when they said he would be safer there and of course they are right. You are in my prayers.

Sue So sorry to hear about Ray. Try to take care of yourself spiritually and physically. Be well sharonGrace

My husband, Mickey, never cam home. We went to bed and woke up to stroke. The first year two years i was waiting for him to get better. So in this third year i have come to grips with the fact of being alone and with out him. He lives someplace else and i visit him. I keep busy with work, the gym and my dog sitting. This summer i joined a local Beach Club. I am taking computer lessons and a quilting class. On a social note I get together (sometimes for a weekend away) with other people who have ill spouses. It really sounds like quite a lot but I still cannot help thinking of my old life with Mickey. A question that nags at me -- How would it be to have Mickey home? I don't know the answer. Some days i am sure I could never do it, and other days I haven't a doubt that of course i could do it. But the doctors took that question away from me. So I try to keep busy and positive. I have found tremendous support in this web site.

I am sorry for your loss. "Family" is a strange animal and sometimes it is hard to deal with them. I am sorry they have hurt you, no one deserves that. Shame on them for doing it when you needed them the most. My thoughts are with you. Sharon

Dear Marie Clair Love, Hugs and Happiness to both of you!!! Its sooo nice to hear a great story. Congratulations Sharon

I went to the breast cancer breakfast with my girlfriend and we had a really nice time. We are going to get together again to catch up on all that we did't get to. I joined a group called "well-spouse" i found it online. They are people who talk and get together to support each other. They have spouses that have been effected with some sort of illness and are trying to help each other. They have a respite weekend in PA in Sept that I am really interested in and would like to go to. It is at a state park that looks just beautiful. Hiking, tubing and horses and being outside. The only draw back is the drive to get there. I am so not a long distance driver. Mickey did all the driving and I got spoiled. And did I mention I am terrible at directions. So I am looking into getting a GPS and biting the bullet and doing the driving. I figure I will break up the trip and stop along the way. I can take Fri off from work and leave in the morning and miss the rush hour traffic and do the same thing on Sunday- I will leave after breakfast and miss the traffic (maybe). So I will see how this works. I don't know.