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fireflylil

My Dad, My Caregiver

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I just want to tell you all about my Dad. He took me in last October 2007, when I was released from rehab. My stroke was 8-17-07 and then I had a Pulmonary embolism on his 84th birthday 9-22-07. He lost my stepmom in April 07 after almost 30 years of marriage. This was his second wife lost to cancer. My mom died in 1970 at age 43. I was 13. He just tells how lucky he was to have two such beautiful women in his life. My mom had 7 kids with him and my Step mom Mary had been a widow with 7 children of her own. We/They were mostly grown when they married in 1978. Anyway, My Dad was lonely and his home had wheelchair access for Mary that would now work for me. I could not go home to my little place in the woods of the White Mountains of NH. I lived alone, my daughter was in her senior year of college. My Dad is a retired high school science teacher. He loves challanges, and I have given him a few. He sees me struggle with the peanut butter jar and sets it up in a "crock with elastic bands so it does not get away from me with one hand. He even made a cracker holder for me so it wouldn't slide off the plate. He made me a one handed walker out of an old exciecise bike! It worked great! It had wheels on the front and sliders on the back. He made a drink holder for my wheelchair. If ever there is a problem. he solves it! Takes out walls if needed, lowers the closet pole, Set me up a drawer for cups,glasses and anything I use at "my level.

He always made sure the walk was clear of snow for the visiting nurses that came daily, He used a snowblower on our very steep driveway and scraped down to pavement so I would be safe to get to the car to go to appointments. We had a record winter for snow. 110 inches! He goes to the ymca 3 days a week to stay in shape so he can push me up the driveway! He makes me eat healthy(like he does) Fruit for breakfast and no less than 4 vegetables for supper. He has his healthy salad for lunch, I can't have the greens because of coumadin.

So, I could go on and on with all he does. he picks me flowers from the garden and blueberries. He drives me around. He even makes sure the toilet paper does not run out! He says he is just thankful he is well and healthy enough to do it! He never complains or gets impatient with me and yet he put up with my frustrations and "moodiness" and depression!- especially in those first few months of adjustments and disappointments and a few trips to the ER

I am just so blessed to have Dad in my life. I thought at first, here I am almost 50 moving back home! Well, it has worked out fine, we have been good for each other! He is just an amazing and awesome man and after all of these years I am just realizing how amazing! And he is so proud of my progress and accomplishments! I am proud of him! "Thanks Dad"

Am I fortunate or what?

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Lilli,

 

Your Father is an Angel here on Earth :Angel: . God Bless him for all he does. You fulfill a need for each other. That is heartwarming - (((hugs))) to you both.

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:I-Agree: with Donna, couldn't have said it any better myself. You have a great day every day!

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What a beautiful testimony; thank you for sharing this. Your Dad must be a very special person and must have been an awesome teacher.

 

Vi

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Lilliann,

What a beautiful tribute to a man of such outstanding strength. He has also done a wonderful job of raising a daughter who is appreciative of the love and devotion of a parent that so many take for granted. To do all he is doing for you especially in his elder years is certainly very difficult, but his sense of responsibility as your father has never wavered and the fact that you note even the smallest of things says a great deal about you too. As you mentioned he is a teacher and you obviously learned a great deal by example. Enjoy every moment with him ~ being surrounded by his immense incredible love for you must be very comforting and wonderful.

Maria :hug:

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Lilli:

 

you both are very lucky to have each other in thie life. hats off to your awesome, loving father. with stories like yours make me believe in Angels

 

Asha

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Wow, a man of infinite strenght and understanding. You know that you both fill a big need that each of you have, seems it's working well. High school teachers are used to moodyness, it comes with the job and teenagers, this must be how Merichsen puts up with me ;)

 

You have a jem of a father.

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That was beautiful Lilli! Your Dad is your strength and Angel. You should show him this thread. You pay great homage to a great man...time for a poem about Dad Lilli :friends:

 

Stu..thankfully Maria only has to put up with you in cyberspace...you must be hell in person..lol! Just joshing Stu..you are brillant..uh...I think :nuts:

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That was beautiful Lilli! Your Dad is your strength and Angel. You should show him this thread. You pay great homage to a great man...time for a poem about Dad Lilli :friends:

 

Stu..thankfully Maria only has to put up with you in cyberspace...you must be hell in person..lol! Just joshing Stu..you are brillant..uh...I think :nuts:

 

 

Hey!!! :Booty:

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I'm right over the NH border. About 1/2 hour from keene. I have a suggestion for those jars or bottles that try to get away. I use one of those rubber grip jar openers and put it between my wheelchair and my right (non-stroke)leg and pin it as I twist the covers off. The gripper helps me pin the juice bottle so I can still get my 3 year old his juice- which makes him happy and makes me feel like a million bucks. Still working on changing his diapers, but getting better. We usually work something out

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I'm in a similar situation. I'm 30, living in the basement apartment of my dad's house... he's 75.

While I don't totally depend on him, he does help me with lots of stuff. Usually little things, like taking out the trash, changing lightbulbs for me (even with a step stool, I can't reach 'em!), bringing in the groceries.

 

After high school, I wanted to be normal and go out on my own. When I started discussing my plans with him, he said "Why do you want to move out? You've got it made, here." ...okay, good point! LOL I sort of wonder if he didn't want to be alone in this big house, too.

 

It may be annoying to be dependent, sometimes... but at least we know we're loved!

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