Guest jwhetstone Posted September 8, 2009 Share Posted September 8, 2009 Dear Dwight, I have just read this post and ensuing replies...it has touched my heart and I'm sure the hearts of many people here. Thank you for sharing it with all of us. You are a wonderful son and I know your Mom feels the same way. You can tell she was a great mother by the job she did raising you. I think there is a special bond between mothers and sons that can not be broken even in death. I know she will always live on in your heart and my Faith tells me she will be forever watching over you. My thoughts and prayers are with you and her and all of your family. I pray you will all know a special peace. Your new friend.......Joy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dwight in Chicago Posted September 9, 2009 Author Share Posted September 9, 2009 A GREAT WOMAN DIES. A NEW FLOWER OPENS. Hi, Mom passed away today, Tues Sept 8 2009, peacefully around 1pm. I was the one person who was with her in her room. Outside, it was a sunny day in Chicago. I had just had lunch in the hospital cafeteria. The nurse sensed her time was coming, but I had thought mom would be around at least thru the night or the next day. I came into mom's room and spoke to her for a few minutes. She looked peaceful. I turned on the pretty music mom likes. I could feel her face was getting cold and her hands were getting thin. I told her repeatedly that I loved her. Kissed her cheek. The nurse came in to do a routine check of her pulse and told me she was sorry to tell me that mom had just passed. There was no pulse. So maybe mom was waiting to see me one last time before she died. I'm glad I was there at the end. And that she did not struggle. I'm doing fine. It was kind of heartbreaking, but what else could it be? I'm all cried out for now. They don't make people like Patsy everyday. We were lucky to have her. I'm glad she did not linger too long or suffer. I did my buddhist chant with her. I gave her a big hug... to send her off for her next big journey. Her next adventure. I left the hospice and went back home. Goodbye for now, Patsy Takeyo Okita. See you in your next amazing life. Thank you so much for being my mother. And a good friend to everyone. FLOWERS LIKE THESE By the way, the flower at the bottom of the page was once part of the floral arrangement in mom's room. I was going to leave the flowers and just take the flower pot. But I took this one pretty flower. When I got home, I was going to put it in a vase, but first I was plucking out the dying blossoms. Big mistake. I accidentally pulled the whole flower off the stem. Then I thought: no problem. I will float the flower in a bowl of water. And so the flower was reincarnated from one purpose to another. I guess that's a little like what happens in reincarnation. Mom served her purpose in this life beautifully. And somewhere in the universe, a new flower opens. Dwight P.S. I'll try to add more pictures to the Gallery in the family section later. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jjohnson Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 Dear Dwight: What a beautiful gift you were given to be with her until the end. Your relationship was one of a kind. Very loving, close... you were friends and Mother/Son. A bond that was formed while she carried you as her baby and a bond that grew with each day you lived. She is very much alive in your thoughts, heart and mind. You can share her with the world. She has touched many lives. I can tell what a great woman she was just by reading your words. I love this poem and I wanted to share it with you: Do not stand at my grave and weep; I am not there. I do not sleep. I am a thousand winds that blow. I am the diamond glints on snow. I am the sunlight on ripened grain. I am the gentle autumn rain. When you awaken in the morning's hush I am the swift uplifting rush Of quiet birds in circled flight. I am the soft stars that shine at night. Do not stand at my grave and cry; I am not there. I did not die Mary Frye Dwight: Look at the dark sky and you will see a shining, twinkling star, that is Patsy letting you know she is doing fine. She is your Guardian Angel and will be with you forever. Memories last forever and you my friend have so many that your heart is overflowing with them. I am here for you my friend, Love n Hugs, Jan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jjohnson Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 Dwight: I loved the flower, maybe you could plant a flower in your garden in her memory, I know I did that when I moved here and in memory of my mom and whever they bloom I think of her. She loved white roses, so we have a beautiful rose bush just for her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dwight in Chicago Posted September 9, 2009 Author Share Posted September 9, 2009 As always, Jan, I appreciate your support and friendship so much. And thanks for sharing that poem too. You are an important voice at Strokenet and I have always found you encouraging and welcoming. Dwight Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swilkinson Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 Dwight, blessings for the time ahead, condolences for the time behind. May your own journey be peaceful and full of light. I'm glad you are in the company of friends now. At this time you do need the support of those you love. Just lean on them when you need to. Even the strong get weary at the end of a long journey and need a rest. Sue. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest jwhetstone Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 Dear Dwight, I am so sorry for the loss of your dear mother. I too, am glad that you were able to be with her when she passed. I know she must have been a wonderful lady to have had such dedication and love from you! I know she will always be in your heart. Peace be with you.........Joy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stessie Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 Dwight, I am so glad you were with your mom when she passed. It was not an easy day nor will it be for awhile. I enjoyed the pic of the flower. Please stay with us here at Stroke Net. You have become an important part of our cyber family and we enjoy having you around. In friendship. Stessie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dwight in Chicago Posted September 15, 2009 Author Share Posted September 15, 2009 Stressie, Thanks for your note. You have an interesting name. Where did it come from? We're going to hold a memorial for mom on Sept 27 at my buddhist center. I'm in the process of putting together a video focusing on mom's life. I have some funny footage where I interviewed her 15 years ago on a range of topics. My brother and I are doing well considering. Still, I can't help but miss mom sometimes. We'll be scattering her ashes soon. Sometimes I picture her watching me from another place. I like the way that feels. I know there will be many of her friends who will come to the memorial and I will pick some of them to speak in the program. My mother used to work at a dept store that sold expensive things from around the world. Her friend Erline said that when a customer liked an item, mom would give the customer a gentle poke and say, "Treat yourself!" That was kind of mom's theme. To treat herself well, and treat others well too. Yes, I hope to stay connected to strokenet. My brother is still trying to recover from his stroke. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stessie Posted September 15, 2009 Share Posted September 15, 2009 Hey, Dwight, thank you so much for the update. We are glad you will stay with us. Stessie was my childhood nickname given to me by my mom. My given name is Stephanie. I'm not quite sure why I used it when I signed on to Stroke Net but it does remind me of good times while growing up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dwight in Chicago Posted September 15, 2009 Author Share Posted September 15, 2009 That's great that your childhood nickname can bring back good feelings. Thanks for sharing, Stessie. Have a satisfying day. Dwight Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kanderson Posted September 15, 2009 Share Posted September 15, 2009 dwight, thankyou for the update on patsy's memorial. i think that will give you peace in your heart. as a mom with son's, there is a special bond we have with them. when i was younger, i really wanted a girl when my second son was born. now i would'nt trade him for the world and the horror stories i hear from friends with daughters, LOL i prefer raising a boy. i hope your brother continues to improve in his recovery. you will be there encouraging him along. he couldn't ask for a better brother. of coarse you can stay here with us, we are a family here, you leaving would be a great loss for us. so please keep updating us as you can. jan's idea of planting something special for your mom is a great idea. we did that too when my mom passed, a white lilac bush, she and my grandmother both had one planted in their honor. take care of yourself Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dstraugh Posted September 15, 2009 Share Posted September 15, 2009 Thank you Dwight for giving us an update on your Mom's memorial. All I can say is that you best be planning on sticking around here with us. You're part of the Stroke Net family. We will always be here for you and your brother. You don't want your cyber family to descend upon you in Chicago because you try to run away from us :kicking: . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dwight in Chicago Posted September 15, 2009 Author Share Posted September 15, 2009 Donna, I will surely remain part of the Strokenet family. Especially now that I know there is a stroke mafia that would descend upon me in Chicago if I disappeared! Kim, I do think Jan's idea of planting something in mom's honor is good. But I am a plant killer. Luckily a friend had delivered to me today a peace plant for my mom and me. It looks sturdy and nice, so hopefully I can keep this one thriving for a long time. I think it will have white flowers when it blooms. Dwight Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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