wine and cigarettes


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Hi

My wife had a stroke 6 months ago, I love very much, and this is could be my problem..by give in to certains things...she used to smoke (1 paquete per day) and drink white wine (4 to 5 glasses per day) from a very long story to short I have managed to cut her cigarrtes to two per day ,one at 1:30pm and the other at 6:30 pm..and to one glass of wine at dinner time...our Doctor believe that not cigarretes at all..and wine should be not taken at all at least on two day of the week..my wife goes to severe distress when she can not have that cigarrte..she think that is the only way she can relax...I could write pages of what I have been trying to convinced that cigarrtes got to go...but I have decide not to create anymore anxieties moments everytime we argue about it...she cries and shes preoare to accept not to have those cigarrtes..but then I can see how miserable and down she looks..her temperature goes up..Patches hasnt been working...Now I dont put any more effort in taking those things away from her...please any of you had experienced anything like that..what have you done..? are you still smoking and in what amount...please only repply people that are in my situation..I wasnt going to put this topic up..but since i have seen great help from all of you to other people, I thought that I may get some tips..thanks

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Thanks for posting this topic and asking for people in your situation only to reply. You state you have seen great help from all of us. Well that is what we do best. We are a support group to help each survivor care giver or family member and friends too!

 

I post this comment in that regard. If she was at a pack a day of cigarettes, she needs to see a doctor to get help with the Nicotine dependency. There are many over the counter (OTC) products too, but most doctors recommends what works best with each patient.

 

You don't want to get a product and it's not right for that person's addiction or habit. Moderate wine consumption is recommended by most doctors and again it depends on the person and what the doctor feels would be enough to solve the problem of each person.

 

Same thing with strokes, no two people react the same to medications or therapies. Each stroke is very different as with people. Another thing to consider is did the smoking contribute to her stroke as determined by the doctors who treated her initially in the ER.

 

Did you see a doctor before using the patches or did they recommend them? What you use makes a big difference in trying to stop the consumption.

 

This comment is one of many you may get on this subject but keep in mind we are here to help you in what ever problem or situation you need help, advise or thoughts on "What to do." Your doctors has the last words, we are not medical doctors but have experienced many problems associated with STROKES!

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Hmm. I'll give this one a try. I had my stroke in July of 07'. I smoked for a little over 25 years at that point. And I probably was a two pack a day guy. And I recall I really did'nt have a problem with smoking until that fatefull evening when they told me I had a brainstem stroke. The whole family was gathered around my bedside as the doctor told me if I continued to smoke I would'nt see my granddaughter past the third grade. I had tried many times in the past to quit but for some reason that moment really hit home with me and I have'nt had a cigarette since. But that's my story and nicotine is a very hard addition to quit. Sounds like see is really trying, she went from 20 cigarettes to only two a day. Thats really an acomplishment. Now the wine I can't comment on, as I have a few beers from time to time.

 

Terry

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Ausi: Bruce was a one pack a day guy pre-stroke, from the time he was 14. We always enjoyed a drink just before dinner when we were catching up on our days. His drink of choice was bourbon. The morning of his stroke, my sister and I walked him down the stairs to await the ambulance, and I lit him a cigarette. He basically put it out after two puffs and I still have that cigarette. Obviously, with a stroke as dense as his was, he can only get cigarettes from me. He asked everyone for the first few weeks. No one dared and 21 months in I still smoke (not in front of him or in the house), we all know he smells it but he has stopped asking. He will ask for a beer once in a while. But wrecks such havoc with his bladder, those times are few and far between. In the past 20 months he has had two shot of bourbon-says it doesn't taste the same, thank God.

 

I like you have had to stand firm on this. He has lost so much and I just can't imagine what he is going through. If he cried, I know I would cave. But after a while, he just accepted no and moved on. Got lucky, I guess.

 

Yo are doing great. Stick to your guns, no special treats or exceptions. Next step is to down grade the cigarettes she smokes, something lighter and with less nicotine and then down to one. Try to get her to changeover to a red wine. Go with the pinks first, then to a red.

 

Remember, honey, that a lot of this is the brain injury. She has good long term Memory and wants her routine back. She does not understand that this may have been the cause of her stroke. It is up to you to be strong and stick to the regime. I believe that if you could stop all of this you would. The tapering is working, just stick to your guns! Best, Debbie

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I am an ex smoker and quitting is so hard. The chemical withdrawls are one thing, but the psycological withdrawls are another. I have an electronic cigarette...you might want to consider this, because for me, I still get cravings and in a moment of stress, when I'm about to fall off the wagon, it really works. You can get different levels of nicotine and no nicotine filters. Of course speak with her doctor first, but these things are great if you are having a terrible time quitting.

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  • 4 weeks later...

hello,

i smoked too before my stroke, but quit. i found an electronic cigarette that was very helpful and i used the menthol, no nicotine inserts. now 5 months later i hardly use that anymore either. but it helped me feel more myself at first and i liked the absence of cigarette smoke from the electronic cigarette -- found it preferable to real smoke. all you breathe in and out is water vapor. also, alcohol was not a problem for me, but what if you mixed some wine with a soft drink sprite eg and lots of ice. perhaps the similar acts of having something to drink and to puff on can help her emotionally and fill a need to be "normal." bev

 

 

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Pack a day smoker.I quit 6 months before i stroked. I was the hardest thing I ever did in my life. I kinda blame the stress from not smoking on strokes. My neighbor at the lake has lung cancer. He smokes 3 packs a day. He also was a raging alcohlic. I was afraid to buy the property. Yet he quit drinking stone cold. Went through kimo...... And quit smoking this winter. In that order * months apart. 6 foot guy weighed 95 lbs in oct last year.

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I tried to quit a few times and unless cigarettes was a direct cause of the stroke, I dont see why she should quit all together. going down to 2 a day is success in my eyes and should not harm her. Now for the wine. Again nothing wrong with a glass a day. Switch to red wine and that is supposed to be good for us. Now with 2 cigarettes a day and a glass of red wine. Nothing wrong with that. She lost a lot the day of the stroke and I dont see why she should lose this little pleasure as well. My two cents,

 

mc

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  • 2 weeks later...

I smoked 4- 6 cigs/days on average before my stroke. My fiancé and I quit immediately after my stroke (I think I was DONE smoking before I even made it to the ER). Being on the patch has helped us immensely, but we are a little concerned about going off from the last step (no nictotine at all?!)...but I also believe that smoking contributed to my stroke. I have ablood clotting disorder making me more likely to clot (didn't know pre-stroke), but also smoked and took birth control pills (which, together are a risk --- and the pill that I was on probably directly contributed -- there aremany lawsuits over it and clotting). I enjoyed smoking, but honestly...I feel like you'd have to pay me AND guarantee that I wouldn't have another stroke if I would take another puff. My stroke was such a scary experience, when my fiancé says he's been craving, I always offer to recount how scary it was for me (he always declines that offer, probably because it was equally scary for him!!).

 

I'd definitely talk to a doctor--maybe Chantix or the e-cigarette would be helpful for her?

 

I'll admit that I'm also hopeful that the location of my stroke (partially superior insular cortex) has impacted my cigarette addition -- I've read that sometimes damage to that area affects addictions.

 

One of the other things I think about is that I struggle to feel "normal" now that I've had a stroke. Maybe those vices help her to pretend things are or can be normal? In that case, it might be time for her to work to redefine "normal" and find new ways to feel "normal".

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  • 3 months later...

Thanks so Much to all of you...has been a while since I wrote here..From one cigarrete to nothing since 28 January.. I'm very happy about it...I give her about three small glasses of white wine per day...the firts one start about 14:30 having the last one(third) with dinner time.about 17:30.

there are only small glasses (7oz) I made an arrangement with her,so she accepted that I put bit more than half of wine and the rest is just water from the tap..it taste pretty awful..but for her is just a bit of quality of life...please..tell me your thoughts about this..she can not change to red wine because affect her sinus..My wife was left almost blind,can not walk by herself,and she is just tired all the time..a beautiful woman(she was a local catwalk model) I love her with all my heart... I'm still concern about this wine...she's on Plavix.aspirin, crestor and the worst Epilim.(2000mg) she developed a severe epilepsy..thanks god that has stopped ..last seizure was in march...this year..Im sorry that I have not answered your replies..I just found them today .. didn't know where they were...Loves you allpost-14314-130840717583_thumb.jpg

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hello,

i smoked too before my stroke, but quit. i found an electronic cigarette that was very helpful and i used the menthol, no nicotine inserts. now 5 months later i hardly use that anymore either. but it helped me feel more myself at first and i liked the absence of cigarette smoke from the electronic cigarette -- found it preferable to real smoke. all you breathe in and out is water vapor. also, alcohol was not a problem for me, but what if you mixed some wine with a soft drink sprite eg and lots of ice. perhaps the similar acts of having something to drink and to puff on can help her emotionally and fill a need to be "normal." bev

 

 

Great Beanna, that is what I'm doing now...wine and water...

 

 

 

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  • 1 month later...

Pack a day smoker.I quit 6 months before i stroked. I was the hardest thing I ever did in my life. I kinda blame the stress from not smoking on strokes. My neighbor at the lake has lung cancer. He smokes 3 packs a day. He also was a raging alcohlic. I was afraid to buy the property. Yet he quit drinking stone cold. Went through kimo...... And quit smoking this winter. In that order * months apart. 6 foot guy weighed 95 lbs in oct last year.

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Ausi: you have nailed this one. And good for you. Small baby steps, and it is working. I know how hard this is. So much has been taken from them and we, as caregivers and loving partners, do not want to take more. You have found a good middle ground. Best, Debbie

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  • 1 month later...

Ausi: you have nailed this one. And good for you. Small baby steps, and it is working. I know how hard this is. So much has been taken from them and we, as caregivers and loving partners, do not want to take more. You have found a good middle ground. Best, Debbie

 

 

 

Thanks Debbie

Shes free of Smoking since 27 January 2011..Took me 6 months to bring her quota of cigarettes to one a day...then I discovered that one cigarette can cause problems as well, the chemicals and other substances can contract the small veins in the brain for 7 seconds,,this contraction could be quite normal for a person that had no stroke..but for a fragile victim like my wife could have been lethal..I talked over one night with her...and I asked her..are you willing to take the risk of having another stroke,,just for one cigarette..? I wasn't going to stop it for her...so she decided not to smoke anymore from that moment..(That was a tremendous call form her..she always said that she will die with a cigarette in her hands). I'm very happy..I really feel that shes on the way to better recovery..I wish I could have done this 30 years ago....Love you Debbie,.. all the best

 

 

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I tried to quit a few times and unless cigarettes was a direct cause of the stroke, I dont see why she should quit all together. going down to 2 a day is success in my eyes and should not harm her. Now for the wine. Again nothing wrong with a glass a day. Switch to red wine and that is supposed to be good for us. Now with 2 cigarettes a day and a glass of red wine. Nothing wrong with that. She lost a lot the day of the stroke and I dont see why she should lose this little pleasure as well. My two cents,

 

mc

 

Your comments are too good to show to my wife..she will love you forever. but I need to be less tolerable..on the wine issue

Shes free of Smoking since 27 January 2011..Took me 6 months to bring her quota of cigarettes to one a day...then I discovered that one cigarette can cause problems as well, the chemicals and other substances can contract the small veins in the brain for 7 seconds,,this contraction could be quite normal for a person that had no stroke..but for a fragile victim like my wife could have been lethal..I talked over one night with her...and I asked her..are you willing to take the risk of having another stroke,,just for one cigarette..? I wasn't going to stop it for her...so she decided not to smoke anymore from that moment..(That was a tremendous call form her..she always said that she will die with a cigarette in her hands). I'm very happy..I really feel that shes on the way to better recovery Thanks for your comments..all the best to you MC

 

 

 

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  • Founder and Owner

Good question to ask her? Smoking is known to cause hypertension, which is a high risk factor for causing stroke. Also, did you know that the odds of a second stroke are 43%? Ask her if she wants to increase those odds by having an occasional cigarette or glass of wine.

 

BTW, if she is taking meds, I would be concerned about drug and alcohol interaction.

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thank you very munch for posted about smoking and i can definetly relate to you and yourwife arguing over trying to get your wife to stope smokinfg as this is quite a habit to break nut break the habit is a must do we all know the health issue that you get from smoking and the cost issue alone is good enough reason to quite now i won"t5 go on about the harm that can be caused from smoking we all know that it exist hypertension cancer of the lungs high blood pressure the list goes on i know that they have a way to help her to give up smoking and live longer with the nicorite gum however i think the best way to give up smoking is to substitute something else that you enjoydoing like every time you feel the urge to smoke do something else to taske your mind off of asmoking what i do is go for a walk it is healthy and good for you amd it is fresh air and no i dont smoke but i use to but i haben"t smoke for 20 years now and thats how i quite and how i started to nbe a runner instead of having a cigerette for lunch i would go for a walk or for a run for thr hour and slowly it got to be a habit and now i don"t smoke anymore but i do go for walks i hope this is help ful to you and all the best to your wife in quitting smoking

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Guest furiawill

Thanks for posting this topic and asking for people in your situation only to reply. You state you have seen great help from all of us. Well that is what we do best. We are a support group to help each survivor care giver or family member and friends too!

 

I post this comment in that regard. If she was at a pack a day of cigarettes, she needs to see a doctor to get help with the Nicotine dependency. There are many over the counter (OTC) products too, but most doctors recommends what works best with each patient.

 

You don't want to get a product and it's not right for that person's addiction or habit. Moderate wine consumption is recommended by most doctors and again it depends on the person and what the doctor feels would be enough to solve the problem of each person.

 

Same thing with strokes, no two people react the same to medications or therapies. Each stroke is very different as with people. Another thing to consider is did the smoking contribute to her stroke as determined by the doctors who treated her initially in the ER.

 

Did you see a doctor before using the patches or did they recommend them? What you use makes a big difference in trying to stop the consumption.

 

This comment is one of many you may get on this subject but keep in mind we are here to help you in what ever problem or situation you need help, advise or thoughts on "What to do." Your doctors has the last words, we are not medical doctors but have experienced many problems associated with STROKES!

I AGREE WITH FRED DOCTORS MAKE THAT CALL, I HEAR CHANTIX IS VERY SUCCESSFUL. I USED TO SMOKE BUT I QUIT IN 1975 AND ONE THING I HAVE LEARNED. YOU HAVE TO REALLY WANT TO QUIT IF YOU WANT SUCCESS, NOTHING ELSE WORKS BECAUSE NO ONE WAS HOLDING A GUN ON ME FORCING ME TO SMOKE. IT IS A CHOICE WE MAKE PLAIN AND SIMPLE. AS TO THE WINE, I'M ITALIAN AND LIVE IN WINE COUNTRY. I DO ENJOY AN OCCASIONAL GLASS OF VINO.

 

-WILL

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I used to smoke and after my stroke the doctoe told me If I smoked it could end up killing me, BAM I quit on that day and never turned back, My husband wasnt a smoker so it made is easier. Do I crave... sure but I like life more.

 

 

 

As for drinking,, I havent drank either. One because of my medicine and plus I can't say no. I have a bery addictive personality. so it would be one then more then more. I will be rather honest, I like drinking.. my jager & I go wayyyyyyy back. But again I value my life

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Boy, I read this and all I can think is, Why does this not compute with Bill? When he was in the hospital over Labor Day week-end after having a TIA the doctor on call asked him what could make him quit smoking....His reply....death.

 

At one time he did ask his doctor about Chantix. Since Bill has bipolar disease he is not a candidate for that drug since it could cause serious emotional problems. Since he is doing well emotionally the doctor didn't want to rock the boat - and I agree.

 

This week he has had severe pains in both arms when he laid down at bedtime. One nitro took the pain away. We all know the pain is a symptom of what is happening to his arteries. There are so many reasons for him to quit.

 

I've been hollered at by doctors, been told I am in control and I could stop it if I would, this is my opportunity to stop his smoking...all of this sounds completely plausible and exactly as it should be. However, the reality is I have not been able to do it. He did not smoke for four years after his first major stroke. Two years ago he went on Cerefolen and it has improved his ability to communicate with me and to enjoy some things in life and yet that is when he began craving nicotine again, The Christmas before he started on the Cerefolen was such a sad one for me. Here I would sit. my husband not being able to put more than three words together before he forgot what he wanted to say...What do I want, my husband to be able to communicate with me and others and go to church, out to dinner, for a ride and notice things around him - or do I want to fight with him daily over his smoking?

 

Good luck to all of you who are trying so hard to quit and congratulations to those of you who have!!!

 

Ann

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  • Founder and Owner

Personally, I find it unbelievable that anybody who had a stroke would want to smoke! Do you guys like playing Russian Roulette? I just posted that the statistics are 43% that you will have a second stroke. I'm sure that percentage increases, probably significantly, if you smoke. I don't know what it is but I know if you had an ischemic stroke that it has to be at least 85%. Smoking increases your chances of stroke twofold if you had an ischemic stroke, so you do the math. Not only will you probably have another stroke but your chances of having cardiovascular disease are very high. Stroke is the number one cause of serious permanent disability.

 

I'm assuming that most smoking stroke survivors dodged the bullet of having to live with serious long term disabilities. What if you have another stroke and your deficits are much worse, like losing your ability to walk, or speak or both? How about not being able to work, drive or startling at every little noise? Don't forget, there is also a chance of various forms of cancer, too, ie lung, throat, mouth, plus there is emphysema. Is five minutes of pleasure really worth it? One of my favorite sayings is, Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.

 

BTW, I used to smoke and quit cold turkey. I knew that my health depended on it. I have enough health problems and don't need smoking to add to it! I also knew that it was important to my family. These things were my motivation. All you smokers need to wake up!

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Personally, I find it unbelievable that anybody who had a stroke would want to smoke! Do you guys like playing Russian Roulette? I just posted that the statistics are 43% that you will have a second stroke. I'm sure that percentage increases, probably significantly, if you smoke. I don't know what it is but I know if you had an ischemic stroke that it has to be at least 85%. Smoking increases your chances of stroke twofold if you had an ischemic stroke, so you do the math. Not only will you probably have another stroke but your chances of having cardiovascular disease are very high. Stroke is the number one cause of serious permanent disability.

 

I'm assuming that most smoking stroke survivors dodged the bullet of having to live with serious long term disabilities. What if you have another stroke and your deficits are much worse, like losing your ability to walk, or speak or both? How about not being able to work, drive or startling at every little noise? Don't forget, there is also a chance of various forms of cancer, too, ie lung, throat, mouth, plus there is emphysema. Is five minutes of pleasure really worth it? One of my favorite sayings is, Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.

 

BTW, I used to smoke and quit cold turkey. I knew that my health depended on it. I have enough health problems and don't need smoking to add to it! I also knew that it was important to my family. These things were my motivation. All you smokers need to wake up!

 

Well said!!

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Although I never smoked, I asked my doctor if I could have 2 glasses of red wine a night. He told me that since I was not on any blood thinning medications, it was ok. That was 7 years ago. I asked him that because so much had been taken from me, I wanted something to look forward to. I wanted to be able to light my fireplace, read and sip on a glass of wine if I felt like it. I know being able to just look forward to that was very theraputic in my recovery. I think you've been very good in helping your wife to quit smoking and allowing some white wine. By the way, white wine has resveratrol in it too, just not as much as the red. Remember that she's grieving for her old self right now and would like to have some control somewhere in her life. Recovery in itself is sooooo difficult and trying to stop bad habits are hard even without having health problems. So, don't be so hard on yourself and maybe think about these things when you're having a rough time. Hope this helps.

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  • 9 months later...

I want to really appreciated all of you for your answers..my lovely wife is now totally free of cigarretes since the 27 January 2010....she only have two l\glasses of wine which i combine with water...Thanks again to all of you..

The main reason for her to have left the cigarrets,was that for about 6 months previously,I was helping her to cut down,,almost at the end,to a one cigarrete per day,but she wasn't going to give on that, untill I told her that her left carotide was in jeopardy,to became blocked if cigarret persist, the night of 27 January 2010,we both with tears in our face we make a final desition to use the last cigarrete that night...and that was it...

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My husband Ray stroked last Feb, and was in the hospital for three months, on a nictotine patch the whole time. He was three packs a day, but had no choice but to quit, he can't even talk to ask anyone for one. Anyway the day he came home, they said he was on step two and make sure to keep him on it, but I couldn't find any and he said (in his own way) don't bother. That was that.

 

But...in the last few months, whenever he sees someone else smoking, he gets excited and now he wants one. It's getting to where I don't want to rent any old movies, there are so many people smoking in them and he stops watching the movie, just keeps pointing to the cigarette. He'll never get one from me, not after all we've been through. If worse comes to worse, maybe an electronic cigarette, but they're not cheap either.

 

Now for the drinking, after awhile he got back to his pre-dinner vodka or rum drink; but he looks forward to it so much, that I am glad to give him that pleasure. He never overdoes it on that front. Such a hard question to answer though. After everything he's been through, I hate to deny him his pleasures. I have to draw the line at cigarettes, though, because I myself blame them for the stroke, and I am so glad he finally was forced to quit. If he only smoked one or two a day.....maybe.....but I'd rather not start on that slippery slope. Congratulations to you and your wife on working it out.

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