They say But you talk fine


SassyBetsy

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we sure do!!!

 

Before stroke I was right side up in this bottle. But now it has breen tossed into the sea.

 

The social worker here has a standard reply

.....sorry that is NOT in my department.

 

THEN she comes in quarterly to ask how are things going......

suddenly i tell her something....

and yes she spits out the reply.

 

oh and activity woman was there....said books came in....

hooray...but will it be the one i requested or another one? am i rude for resenting the gift?I am disappointed in false promises.

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Yes it is a healthy bit of assertiveness. I have never been hugely assertive but I always wanted to embrace that because you are listened to a little bit different. I've seen it move mountains. I want to move mountains. Sometimes now I feel like I do. I think that it is good for me...others look at me kinda unsure of what to think. I own it more and more every day. Kicker is I am still truly nice...assertive doesn't = mean.

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Pam I know it may feel rude. I don't feel that it is rude "to think". We as survivors usually know when people are genuine and have empathy and understanding...care. Resentment is something we all have felt. My best answer is don't let resentment bring out all the negative. Try to focus on positive. Realize how you feel, accept it (which is the really hard part), and then file it away and feel your inner validation. I'm a believer in changing a circumstance that elicits my negative side...that sometimes may make others feel uncomfortable but you have to advocate for you. So I sing "Let it go! Let it go!!!". Nothing is important enough to compromise your inner happiness.

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You are so right!!!!

 

I needed that pep talk to remember that thinking is ok.accept all of me.

 

It was not my stuff I picked. I accepted it with gratitude and graciousness.

I assured her that giving us residents supplies of our own is life changing. We have an activity now.independent but yet we share looking at eachothers work or sitting together coloring. this is adult art. I color someone elses drawing....like an illustrator team thing lol.      I am a color specialist lol.

yes my hobby is all i can do to be productive.

 

maybe their budget does not allow for what she said picknit out......I saw she genuinely wants me happy. I azsured her she brings good to us. she does make a difference. In fact she has not told us to share and in fact gave me another set. and more books. it is amazing we got all this .That I received some.

I suppose the child in me is selfish stubborn.

Anyway I get something so I am blessed.

 

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Pam I love how you think things out. Oh the inner child...call her to come play often. Sometimes she is stubborn but she only knows to bring with her the good feels. I like my inner child 👑 she brings bravery with the simple gift of freedom to feel joy. It's pure, it comes from the heart. So I say bring out the colors and make beautiful art until your heart is replenished!!

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My daughter is very artistic. Amongst other things, I would like her to get her diploma as an art therapist. It would do her good, as well as others.

 

Kelli, you mentioned detailed questions requiring detailed answers...definitely a big problem.  It’s worse when these questions come from doctors etc.

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  • 2 months later...

I think I have Mel Tillis syndrome. I don't stutter, just talk slower than I used to and search for words more. But when I sing a song that I know the words to I don't miss a beat and sing as I always did. Someone said I should sing my sentences. Not the same thing, because it comes back to having to think about what you're saying. I guess I can still talk fast but my mind lags behind. Lol

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The sing talk thing is backed up by research. You connect into the speech center of the brain via a different path when singing than you do when talking. With training it can be used as a way to work around aphasia. I guess you have to think about what you want to say rather than how to say it.

 

It might be worth a try.

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Wow!  I'm glad I read this thread.  For one thing I got angry with my ex last week, and all of a sudden I could speak clearly!  I was as surprised by it as maybe he was, but then he told me I was faking it the rest of the time and a liar, didn't do enough google research to fake it well enough...blah blah blah....Hes a A**, most of the time....hence EX!   But it did get me wondering.  And then today, I had one of those days when the challenges and difficulties of everyday life....I just couldn't meet head on with a positive attitude...and I got frustrated with myself.  My friend called so I was ranting at her about thinking a basket in my yard was a chicken--for 6 minutes (my vision said it was moving.. and I know it was 6 minutes because i was microwaving water for my coffee.), and being stopped dead in my tracks while trying to take my sons clothes out the drier because a sock that was my daughters was in there too...and it was purple...and it doesn't belong with my sons clothes...but where does it go?, and what do I do with it?. response (BLANK STARE).   And the fact that I had a two page document that I needed to make two copies of and I totally screwed up making the copies, running several just totally blank sheets of paper, then trying to put them all back together (just 2 pages mind you!) and I couldn't figure out why I had 3 pages of each thing....duh...original?!? and then were each of those documents were supposed to go...This was an hour long ordeal (for someone whose job depends on being able to organize hundreds of pages of information and get it to differing areas, getting supporting documents for each part...blah blah.. feeling like a looser).  Anyway, when my friend called I was telling her all of this, at first I was halting, stuttering and monotone as usual (sometimes I breathe in when I say a word?!, or hiccup?)..then as I got more frustrated and mad....my speech became clearer and clearer...eventually she said "hey...keep getting mad..you talk better that way".  LOL which made both of us laugh.

Anyway, I thought it was just me.... good to know it happens to other people too.... thank you so much for sharing your life- all of you-it makes it more bearable for us newbies, and less confusing.

 

Oh yes.  and I can sing too...but not talk (very well).  Well...I mean...sing as well as a "shower singer" ever has sung before 🙂  Now I do it more and more because it just feels good to be fluid in SOMETHING!  Walking and talking like a broken robot and having the logical and sequential capacities of a chipmunk on crack the rest of the time....Singing makes me feel alive again.

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I havn't had an opportunity to try that one out but I don't think it would work with me. There are times when I've been upset and tried to make myself understood and nothing comes out at all. At the moment I am trying to whistle more to improve my voice. Trouble is remembering to do it! It is a good trick to do because there is nothing wrong with a person walking around whistling, but a person walking around talking to themselves rather suspect!

Deigh

 

 

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I'm a redhead....so....when I get mad it might be on a whole other scale then all "you" non-alien people.  LOL  But luckily it doesn't happen often.  I described the two instances in the last 6 weeks and that is more than normal, because I am frustrated to a MUCH LARGER degree daily, post stroke.

But yeah, watch out for fiery red-headed girls when they get mad.... Pele the Volcano goddess couldn't compare!  I especially hate it when people think its cute when I get mad, because I'm little and ornery, as though that makes my point any less valid!!!! 

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Tarina...a rangga!

It's interesting what you say about improving when you are cross.

I'm like Deigh,  all downhill if I'm angry or upset. 

Stay Calm are two of my favourite F words!

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  • 7 months later...

Interesting thread in several ways. First off, since I had an "out of the blue" brain aneurysm that ruptured, and subsequently stroked during surgery to repair the bleed, I usually say that I had a TBI. The damage from the bleed and repair, despite the rapid response airlift and quick surgery, there is permanent damage and I've come to accept that. What I've noticed since post injury and stroke is many of the deficits. Speech was affected in an unusual way, I've had this discussion with my sister because when talking with her, especially over the phone, like previously stated, often I cut her off in mid speech just to add a point or thought. So much so, that I apologized for it and say the best I can describe it is I get like a locomotive speeding on the rails and I need to get a thought out that I run on, and out of control. My thoughts are cohesive but, my delivery isn't so much. I've just wondered if when I'm speaking that I cannot stop myself, maybe I'm subconsciously afraid if I cannot get my thought out I'll forget my train of thought. I now just try to listen more in a conversation instead of stating thoughts as much. That has yielded some strange pauses in our conversations because I'm trying to work at timing and delivery, instead of the overbearing locomotive approach to getting a thought out. 

 

I found just admitting that I have this difficulty in advance has helped me in conversations with my sister as she now doesn't feel that she is being cut off or her thoughts slighted in any way. I'm still working on it, and just knowing about it helps me. 

 

As for the stroke/brain injury part. I've often wondered that "if" things happened differently or I possibly had any kind of warning of an existing aneurysm, I could had possibly been treated before the rupture occurred possibly limiting some of the damage incurred. Being an outdoor worker here in the bright south Florida sun, having small headaches now and again I thought were normal, even wearing sunglasses all the time. I never got checked out for what I thought may have been normal headaches. It's water under the bridge now and thoughts about "what-if's" better left in the past. Still today I won't hesitate telling somebody especially if they bring up having reoccurring bad headaches, I tell them of my experience and it might be a good thing to check into..

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Do you want to know what I find interesting about this thread?

 

The title!

 

Being from Western Australia, we word differently to the rest of the country. Or probably world.

 

I kept thinking there was something amiss in the title. I've figured it out. 

 

We put "but" on the end of sentences. 

 

You talk fine, but.

 

I need to go to the shop, but. 

 

It's late, but. 

 

We put but at the end instead of the beginning. 

 

But you can do both, but.

 

I'm pretty sure it's phasing out but, as my kids don't say it much.

 

Sorry to hijack, but I felt like it needed to be said, but. 

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I got on late today. I missed most of the chat. I was interested in how many of you have problems putting words together. Some days I can talk very well, However, many days I cannot think of the words that I need. 

 

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Hope, I amo n the chat line now, your avater is there but I dont seem to be able to have a chat with you! Talkative local keeps switching on but not talkin at all. Cant understand what is happening?

Deigh

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22 hours ago, HopeE said:

, However, many days I cannot think of the words that I need. 

 

I think we all have this problem too, It is not unusual for me to ask my wife for a word I cant find. She is my walking encyclopedia, except when she cant remember either!,

Difficult to understand what happened on last chat, you didn't seem to be answering me but having a chat with someone else whos avatar was not registering. 

Deigh 

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On 8/7/2019 at 7:27 PM, Deigh said:

 

I think we all have this problem too, It is not unusual for me to ask my wife for a word I cant find. She is my walking encyclopedia, except when she cant remember either!,

Difficult to understand what happened on last chat, you didn't seem to be answering me but having a chat with someone else whos avatar was not registering. 

Deigh 

Some of the people on line take a lot of time. I try to keep things short, but Sometimes I talk too much, too. 

 

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I'm enjoying the chat, but I do have some problems with continuity, sometimes the subject will suddenly change direction and at  other times get lost somewhere.

Deigh

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  • 3 weeks later...

oh and those conference calls...

 

Good Lord, speaking of calls, please don't put me on hold with that abrasive sounds that resemble music, I think. The other day I was immediately reminded of this particular phone call as they always put you on hold and that loud abrasive music I cannot turn down without not being able to hear the representative answering again! It scrambles my thoughts that I try and hold together.

 

 

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I have to write my question down..even my own information for I will forget mid sentence 😡😱

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  • 6 months later...

I see stroke patients weekly, many can not speak or  can talk but cant find the words.Ive has aphasic patients, and I say 'its ok"....

"You hear the words in your head but can't get them out"? They usually smile and say yes or shake their head.One actually started talking while I was in her room. That was awesome.

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I've had so much trouble this last few weeks with talking. 

Stumbling over words, not finding them at all and losing train of thought mid sentence. 

Doesn't help that I get interrupted. 

It's always been frustrating, but really bad lately. 

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