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SassyBetsy

They say But you talk fine

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I lose my train of thought, fumble around for words, make a funny sound when saying f words, and I swear I talk super slow.

 

ok so maybe I talked too fast before, but I said yes speech group helps. Just sharing our stories helps, and chatting too.

 

Just because I can talk, do not think my speech is what it used to be. But nothing is changing.

But after they interrupt me,finish my sentence wrong,or twist my idea,and I get upset saying wait for me to say this right. I had a stroke. They say,no, you are fine. 

 

But how to fix these things.

step one.be calm

step two.be calm

step three.be calm.

 

once flustered, I bumblejumble my name and address. Or I smile nodding wthillbilliegoat, what does it matter let them think for me and so they go away feeling like a genius when they were stooooopedos hitting the wrong target.

 

oh, those best ones are on the phone. they transfer me. I tell the script more times than an FBI fugitive, often really reading what i need to say.

..but people cut me off. transfer me.

 

oh and those conference calls. they say please hold while i call that office to verify discuss report and speak when they come on the line. ok once,they were not doing what I needed and I was shouting listen to me,can you hear me,this is not helpful,you are messing things up, can you just stop and listen.  and that was me being creative because my mama washed my mouth for shut ups and that is 4 letter word to me.SHUP. Anyway,the nursing staff came running to see if i was ok,what is ruckus going on. As I recall, I hung up just speechless in my state of mind. 

 

Gotta love it when they ignore me,like I speak martian. Especially when I say No. And the just keep asking. maybe a tad differently than first time maybe exactly the same. No. No. Can you hear me? Please listen to what I said. Can you respect me as a person who made her choice. No.

Mama said No Means No Every Time. I loved that and use that on all kids,no matter their age.

 

So they think my stroke ruined my mind, but then they expect me to be brilliant. Make up your mind.

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Pam I love the way you tell your "things". :wink: I can very much relate the moments and feel your frustrations and then to me it comes through with this humorous sarcasm that I love from you. Please don't take what I say as a negative because it is a compliment. I have felt heartache, frustration, anger, hope, relief, and a multitude of other things in your posts. Sometimes I feel like ®[]»]]%° to all of those fools who think they know you and can speak for you. God bless your strength and perseverance.

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Pam, I have  dysarthria from my stroke,and while I can't explain it as well as you, I've  had many of the same experiences as you. Usually, if people would just take the time to listen to me talk, and try to understand what I'm saying, they would understand what the odd-sounding words are. My friends and family understand me, because they have tried to understand me. And, if they don't, they have found that I don't mind at all if they ask me to repeat what I just said. But, the problem is that a lot of people won't, or can't, take the time to try and understand you.  What I've found that helps sometimes is to explain my problem to them briefly, then ask them if they would mind communicating via email because I can write better than I talk. If they agree to this, they soon discover that I'm not as dumb as they think I am.Best, Becky

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I practice my speaking as much as I can but avoid the phone if possible. Most adults understand me but I have some problem with youngsters. I do agree though that I'd rather resort to texting than talking over the phone especially if I have something tricky to talk about.

Deigh

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I'm smiling, I do the same thing Becky. Sometimes I tell a person right up front that I had a stroke and at times I stutter and can't get out what I'm trying to say so bear with me. To my happy surprise 99% of people are very positive and understanding. Now that does not necessarily take my frustration away if I do have trouble but the other person is typically very patient. Unlike you and Deigh I can talk to people on the phone but I am very well known to start out with the same explanation and get the usual positive response. I realize it would be awesome if my speech mimicked my written words...LOL I'm pretty good at writing my thoughts isn't it weird how that works. I totally get why email makes a lot of sense Becky. My daughter is sorta unsure how she feels about my forthcoming when I first speak to people. She has asked me why I do that...suppose I am just trying to reduce the frustration I may encounter. Call it using the stroke card lol. Smiles, I can very much relate to all of you. Don't take my smiles and laughs in a negative light, I get the same frustrations...I suppose it has become my way of dealing with it especially when I am not getting through to someone. It can be upsetting but I can also laugh about my own experiences like a sort of inside joke I guess with myself.

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