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For reasons that I can't/won't explain, there's a lot of tension in the house at the moment. 

 

So much so, I really need to cry.

 

But I can't. It just won't happen. I'm not holding them in, they just aren't there.

 

Not even the silent tears that fall when you are desperately trying to keep in.

 

Is it possible, that after all the tears and emotion that happened when thisall began, I've run out of tears?

 

💚👑

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Difficult to help you here Janelle, normally a lady solves the problem by going our and buying a new pair of expensive shoes but this could only make the problem worse for you, so how about a new expensive summer dress? Hope the enclosed cartoon fits the bill.

Deighlarge_lady.jpg.f70569f1e03801139f56822deae4aea5.jpg

 

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Sometimes they just aren't there. Try reading a soppy book or watching a tear jerker film.  You may find that weeping over something less vital is enough to unblock the reflex. or arrange to see a counselor and talk about the problem, remember your GP can set this up for you if you don't want to ask family to do it, and these days it can be via telehealth so you won't need a driver either.

 

Also remember that we love you and you can contact me via Messenger if you want a private chat (text or voice) with someone outside the situation.

-Heather

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GQ, I WISH that

it was possible to to "run out of tears" but what we really need is having no more situations to cry about . When I feel like crying, but cant'', it's because I have more than one emotion about the situation and just thinking about the situation both emotions to the forefront, and I can't cry until I CAN REACH SOME SORT OF RESOLUTIION.

Don't worry, your tears will find you when you're ready for them.Becky

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

]" it 

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Hugs my friend (((HUGS))). I'll tell you a little story about my tears (in the past 4 months). As you know I have ongoing PBA (emotional lability) and the past 4 months have been pretty emotional for me. So I went from completely over emotional and crying at the drop of a feather to feeling the sad pain and the inability to let it out (no tears no matter how much my body needed to). I was so frustrated!!! Sort of angry at moments, completely defeated at others. I thought about the lack of tears so many times (talking to myself, working to shed just one tear). After talking it over with my therapist, I found some answers.... 1st due to my stroke and where it happened and my defecits I have quite a few Psychiatric issues and depending on the moment it can trigger strange "symptoms". I definately have been under extra stress and I have been having moments of dissociation. My therapist and I have been working for a long time to recognize when this is happening to me (it helps with excessive anxiety to recognize it). My lack of tears is in this same "realm" of psychiatric stuff... I can't handle excessive anxiety/stress and something triggers when I am having that and I sort protect myself without trying or maybe knowing (the more tears I have the more anxiety at the moment so the more my psyche diverts, softens, pushes down any emotions that try to hijack me. The good news is that it is not lasting it will pass. That cry I had a week ago, was a much needed flood and even though negative emotions were the catalyst the act of crying releases a huge amount of tension. (and I sleep which is always a plus) I sure hope your tear maker gets back online soon I know what it's like to lose it for a bit and it's not easy. Love you friend and hope you feel better soon.

 

Tracy

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Sometimes just watching an uplifting video that is meant to be joyful, it is an I cry.

 

Also, the way you wrote that emotional post was very well done. very poetic 

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I like to watch the comedy,"Dry bar"videos on youtube,they help. I've recently  had some small arguments with my wife of 36 years, We've never argued much if ever, She yelled st me for the first time and it freaked me out.I could see her leaving and all the  bad that comes with that, but it blew over. She said I "snipe" at her ....

        I think she is too protective of me, reminding me multiple times to do such and such...But I am guilty of forgetting what was said, and cant' help it .   At this point all is well again. I am controlling my tone when we talk, and trying to chill more. Meditation helps. I stiil take a low dose anti depressant as well.

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Common stuff my friend. Just change the names to Wil and April. I try to keep all she puts up with and does for me in the front of my mind and still act like and respond like an  *beep* at times. It's a very good thing for me her father was a hardened city policeman she was raised by! We are still together with these women after all this and this would be so different without them we both know so well.

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None of us are perfect, and sometimes things happen that hurt (both to us and by us). The trick is to step back mentally and give yourself some space to understand what happened and why and then decide what you are going to feel/do about it. Often it's just about acknowledging that it happened, and letting it go, sometimes you need to say "that hurt" either to yourself or the other involved, sometimes it makes you change how you interact with the other for a while. The main thing I find is to remember it was mostly/usually not deliberate on either side, however opening yourself to hurt is part of being close to others.

 

Hang in there everyone. bad days and good days are part of life try to appreciate and enjoy both.

 

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On 11/3/2021 at 1:35 AM, alansd said:

I like to watch the comedy,"Dry bar"videos on youtube,they help.

We dont see that programme here. 

I have asked a couple of times about the big procedure you had done about 9months ago, but you dont answer!. If you read this please tell us whether you had any good results from it .

Thanks

Deigh

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Thank you so much for your support, online family! 💚💚

 

Everything came to a head, and tears flowed. So did many angry words...not from me...but I did respond quickly with hurtful words.

 

Yes, was with my husband!

 

The trouble with all of us, really, is we bottle things up for too long, and the resulting 'conversation ' can be very painful. 

 

I do feel better emotionally now everything's out in the open. 

 

💚👑

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Janelle I am so glad all is in the open and yes it does feel so much better. Life is lighter. I think you are right, many of us bottle things up and it is always a burst of release which can be overwhelming. One thing I know for myself is that I work on speaking my truth as it comes instead of bottling it up inside. This is something I'm not an expert at. I have difficulty after my stroke with processing information (coming in or going out)... it tends to add a layer of emotion and anxiety making it difficult to communicate fluidly. I have learned I pay much more for carrying these burdens than letting them free. LOL my imperfections at controlling my emotions during communication is an ongoing project. I have a very small group of close friend/family who love me enough to allow me time and patience to get my points across... hopefully in a positive and calm way. This is not perfect of course, there are definately times where my point comes across hurt, angry, frustrated, and possible rude feeling. It's hard sometimes... and I have found myself overwhelmed with emotions and frustrations and just need to stop communication (sometimes crying, covering my ears, saying not so nice words - as you can imagine it doesn't go over very well). Ha ha I think of having a laminated "This is why..." typed out explanation of my reaction rather than the moment coming off as spoiled brat. Weird to explain but it can seem childish reather than frustrated upset behavior. This is just a long way of saying sometimes when I need to get something out that I can't seem to sometimes gets to that point where I cover my ears, squeeze my eyes closed, and loudly repeat "la la la la la la la la la..." or crawl under the table and suck my thumb (ok a little dramatic but funny). I'm not exactly sure what I'm trying to say here.... my stuff is a work in progress. I celebrate your release my friend, it can make all the difference in the world. Huggs!!!

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Tracy that makes me think of a training course I was sent on years ago where the trainer said "take a seat where you like, I want everyone to be comfortable" and I nearly caused a riot by promptly crawling under the desk and taking up lotus position under the desk with my training manual on the floor in front of me. Apparently that wasn't what he meant, but I've always felt more comfortable on the floor than in a chair 🙂 and I could still see everything so why not 😛

 

But that's just a side note When emotions a running high it almost doesn't matter what you say people still hear what they expect to hear, not always what you said.

 

Hang in there team and remember  it's never as bad as think it might be.

((HUGS))

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Oh Tracy...thanks for sharing. I don't suffer emotionally like your stroke deficit, and I must say that it must take up a huge part of your day, overcoming emotions constantly. 

 

Keep fighting the good fight.

 

Heather you go girl! He did say get comfy!!

 

It's interesting that you say about people hearing what they expect to hear.

 

When I'm stuttering over words, or searching for them, it's amazing that when people try and do me a Molly Meldrum, just how wrong they can be!!

 

💚👑

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