bstockman Posted August 5, 2006 Share Posted August 5, 2006 Andi,, I am SO sorry. We are here for you (((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jwatrous Posted August 5, 2006 Share Posted August 5, 2006 Andi - as you know stroke is an awful thing, and it never leaves, sorry - I am 20 yrs. post stroke, and just existing using one side of my body can and is exhausting, so let him go at his own pace. He pushes himself everyday, so an extra day in bed is perissable June :blush: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charmin Posted August 6, 2006 Author Share Posted August 6, 2006 I truly believe sometimes I am losing my mind, I don't understand why I stay sometimes. I love Steed more than I ever thought would be possible for me to love someone. But I don't know how much more I can take really. I need to ask anyone if they know what to do for my situation. Yes Steed is still depressed but it is not always a normal depression, he seems to get this look that takes over and he just starts shouting and saying really hurting things that I know Steed would never say to me and he starts breaking things in his reach. I know in my mind that it is really not him, but it still hurts so much. It is almost like something outside the realm of normalcy has taken over his body and mind. Now I know this sounds like I am crazy but it is really really scarey at times. If I start to cry or yell back it makes matters worse. When all is said and done he does not even remember these outbursts he usually falls asleep right afterwards and wakes up and wants to know why the chair is by the front door if I tell him it is because he kicked me out and locked the door and put the chair there to ensure that I don't come back in he just looks at me and truly does not remember , and I dare not bring up other times because I don't want to put anymore undue stress or worries on him. Is there any help out there, does anyone know what I am talking about and what I need to do to help him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cindy Posted August 9, 2006 Share Posted August 9, 2006 Hi Andi, I'm so sorry for your situation. Luckily my husband never got abusive. He does swear all the time, but can't help it because of the stroke. It just comes out and he isn't aware of it. So I've had to explain to family, friends, etc. of why he does it. If you haven't already there are some postings regarding this type of change in the spouse/survivor. If you go to the message board and click on CLASSIC POSTINGS AND ADVICE, then click on 12 LINKS - PERSONALITY CHANGES, ABUSIVE - VIOLENT - DIFFERENT SINCE STROKE, there may be something in there to help you relate to what you are going through. I truly hope things get better for you. :hug: Cindy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
martyhahn Posted August 10, 2006 Share Posted August 10, 2006 :Clap-Hands: My two cents worth! I am four years post stroke, 52 years old, left side affected and at times I too just don't want todo anything other than try to sleep since i am soooooo tired all the time,but I have come to realize that if I can get my self pushed to get up and do something I generally feel better about life in general, but sometimes it is really hard for me to get going and I don't like to be "pushed" From my lovely wife of 32 years it feels like nagging which of course is a big negatative. Does your husband have any activity he really likes? For me it is fishing and being out on my fishing boat, so if I have a fishing day scheduled it is easier for me to get going, of course I know tat the boat has a very nice bed down in the cabin and many times when the fatigue is just too much I do go below to lay down and hope a biting fish will force me back up on deck! Just my ideas good luck and God Bless. Marty Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ssanchez Posted August 10, 2006 Share Posted August 10, 2006 The residual of a stroke will never leave. I am 11 years post stroke I just get better as each day goes by. I was left with left side weakness and some memory problems, but I see myself and Believe me, I notice my memory getting better. not the best or at least where I want it to be just getting better. You have to remember each person's stroke is different, and we all heal differently. Just continue to exercise and keep working at the very best in your therapy or keep in mind that you will not let it get the best of you, push yourself to the limit, and then some. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jwatrous Posted August 10, 2006 Share Posted August 10, 2006 Sorry, but I am a 20 yr. survivor, having stroked in 1985 at age 39 :Tantrum: . and it never ends, really as if its not one thing, then its another, but please give him time as I still get fatigued as stroke takes alot out of a person, but I can honestly say that because I have always been so motivated, hanging around, for me was not in my vocab, but according to doctors, it also depends what the stroke has damaged - You may be asking too much from him, if he's had more damage than you realize - Have a heart-to-heart with him and his doctor to see what he is capable to do June :blush: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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