johnk6749

Stroke Caregiver - female
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    60
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About johnk6749

  • Birthday 05/07/1949

Shared Information

  • Stroke Anniversary (first stroke)
    04-24-2014
  • Stroke Anniversary (second stroke)
    07-11-2014
  • How did you find us?
    Google Search

Registration Information

  • First Name
    Grace
  • State
    PA

johnk6749's Achievements

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Member (3/10)

  1. Happy Anniversary johnk6749!

  2. Happy Birthday johnk6749!

  3. Happy Anniversary johnk6749!

  4. johnk6749

    In home help

    Based on the replies here, I won't be looking for anyone to come into the house. I don't have time to check everyone. I have to assume anyone is a potential criminal. If I don't trust them not to steal from us, I wouldn't trust them alone with my Mom. I don't have surveillance cameras. I would be better off having a cop here while I run my errands.
  5. I need to get someone into the home when needed so I can take care of personal business. I would like to know how to evaluate a care agency to know if I can trust them with Mom's care while I am gone. I would start with the recommendation from the hospital social worker. She said I should stay here the first time to see how they are. Any thoughts?
  6. Everything seems back to normal now. I am getting supper ready for us. She thinks I am a different person than the one she wanted to fight with earlier. I'll accept that if it makes things better.
  7. Mom gets very confused. Today is a bad day. She says she fell and wants to go to the doctor. She didn't fall and seems as well as any other day. When I tell her she didn't fall she wants to fight with me. This is the hardest part of being her caregiver to me.
  8. Happy Birthday johnk6749!

  9. I don't think it is a problem. I know she needs the rest. It bothers her that she is sleeping a lot. She thinks she isn't getting better if she isn't doing more. When we had the visiting team from the hospital coming every day, I had to have her up at 8:30 in the morning. They thought her fatigue was a problem. I don't think it is a problem at her age. She was fatigued a lot pre-stroke. I want her to get rest whenever she feels like she needs it. John
  10. Today is day 5 that Mom has not been out of the bedroom. She seems fine, but wants to stay in bed. We have been eating our meals in there. John
  11. Mom had breakfast and dinner in bed yesterday and breakfast in bed today. She cried this morning because she didn't think she was getting better. She thinks she had an accident and has to get better so she can get back to work. I consider it positive if she isn't getting worse. I just try to keep her happy. One day at a time. John
  12. That's exactly what I am wondering. Before the stroke, I did a LOT for her. Sometimes I felt like I was living her life for her. She has a list of serious medical conditions, supposedly being managed. She is 100% dependent on the pacemaker according to her cardiologist. I have a hard time getting done what I would like because she wants me with her all the time. She thinks she is going to get better and get back to work. She doesn't remember that she has been retired for 22 years. It's probably worse than anyone thinks. The neurologist in the hospital said she has had many strokes. I know what he means. She had many episodes when she was dizzy and heard loud noises and then it went away. I believe all of those events were strokes. I couldn't convince her to go to the hospital back in those days. I don't really know what to think at this point. John
  13. Mom is sleeping a lot of the time. I don't know if this should be a concern, or if it is a normal process for stroke recovery. Now that the visiting team from the hospital are no longer coming, I let her sleep in the morning until she feels like getting up. This is usually between 10:30 to 11:30. Then I make us something to eat and give her medications. Sometimes she then helps with something in the kitchen and then says she has to lay down or she just wants to lay down after taking her pills. Then she gets up before dinner and goes back to bed after dinner. She watches some TV in the evening then goes to sleep. This isn't much of a life. It is much like the life of the cat; eat, sleep, and bathroom. She is suspicious of my activities. I like to get up in the morning, get a cup of coffee and do some work. She thinks I am up to something. She expresses a lot of paranoia and insecurities. She doesn't trust me doing things all day. I just do the best I can to get things done and keep meals on the table. Should this be an immediate concern for me? John
  14. Mom won't refer to me as her son, and doesn't speak as though I am. There seem to be brief moments of clarity. This evening we were joking. Suddenly she said, "You shouldn't laugh at your mother." Then she reverted back to not being my mother. This is a very confusing condition. John
  15. My Mom has been diagnosed with “dementia without behavioral disturbance.” I have learned not to argue with her or try to correct her too much because whatever she thinks and says is real to her. She is not going to accept something that is contrary to what she thinks is real just because someone says so. We had a nice pork roast dinner for Christmas. Mom helped prepare the roast for the oven, peeled some potatoes, cut the carrots, and prepared the asparagus. The dinner turned out excellent. Mom told me on Christmas night that she had a nice Christmas. That's all that matters to me. For the past few months Mom has treated me like I was her boyfriend who is taking care of her while she is sick. I learned not to argue about it or try to correct it because she would get agitated and sometimes abusive. I didn't want to live in a state of constant turmoil. She always talked about her son John like he was someone else living somewhere else. Last night before Mom went to sleep she said to me, “I want you to know that I am grateful for everything you do for me. You are the only one in the world who cares about me, except for my son John, which is also you." I was stunned. John