THIS AFTERNOON, I CAME HOME, SAT DOWN IN MY EASY CHAIR, OPENED THE NEWSPAPER, AND EVENTUALLY CAME TO THE OBITUARIES. THERE , I READ ABOUT THE DEATH OF ONE OF MY EX-BUSINESS PARTNERS OF 10 YEARS+. I CALLED A MUTUAL FRIEND TO FIND OUT WHAT HAD HAPPENED. IT SEEMS DANNY CAME HOME DRUNK, TOLD HIS WIFE HIS LIFE WAS A MESS AND DECIDED TO PLAY RUSSIAN ROULETTE. THE FIRST TWO TRIES FAILED, BUT THE THIRD ENDED HIS LIFE AT 50.
LET ME BACKTRACK. DANNY AND I GO BACK ALMOST 30 YEARS. 12 YEARS AGE, WE DE
GOODY. MY WIFE LEAVES ON A FOUR DAY "VACATION" WITH HER TWO SISTERS IN ATLANTA, GEORGIA STARTING MONDAY. SO WHILE SHE IS GONE, I DECIDED TO VISIT THE GAMBLING BOAT, COOK DINNER FOR MY NEW NEIGHBOR UPSTAIRS, GO SHOPPING, AND TRAVEL AROUND THE AREA. THEN YESTERDAY, SHE SAID, "DON'T DO ANYTHING STUPID WHILE I'M GONE". SO, I WILL BE EATING ALONE, NOT GAMBLING, AND CURLING UP WITH A NEW BOOK I JUST BOUGHT. OH WELL, LIFE IS GOOD.
BUT TODAY WE GO TO THE ADOPTION AGENCY WHERE MY GRANDSONS CAME FROM
FINALLY, I CAN SIT HERE IN A LITTLE PEACE AND QUIET. APARTMENT LIVING ISN'T THAT GREAT. I HAD TO ASK MY NEXT DOOR NEIGHBOR TO TURN THE BASS DOWN ON HIS STEREO. MY CAT WAS SITTING IN THE CHAIR WITH HIS PAWS OVER HIS EARS, AND THE WALLS WERE SHAKING.
AFTER 7 MONTHS, I NOW HAVE A NEIGHBOR OVERHEAD. HE MOVED IN LAST NIGHT WITH HIS GIRLFRIEND.
I'M EXAUSTED JUST HEARING THE CREAKING OF THE BED. I HOPE THE FLOOR ABOVE IS REINFORCED, OR I COULD HAVE COMPANY IN MY BED.
ON A LIGHTER NOTE, I H
LIKE EVERYBODY, I'M IN VOGUE BECAUSE I HAVE A CPAP MACHINE FOR SLEEP APNEA. I DON'T HAVE THE NOSE MASK BECAUSE I CAN'T KISS MY WIFE WHILE TRYING TO STAY ALIVE FALLING ASLEEP. I HAVE THE NEW ONE THAT FITS IN THE NOSTRILS.
THERE IS A RUBBERY THIN BAND THAT FITS AROUND THE HEAD TO HOLD THE APARATUS IN YOUR NOSE. THIS BAND STRETCHES AFTER CONSTANT USE AND BECOMES USELESS. SO I WENT TO THE HOSPITAL GOODIE SUPPLY STORE TO GET A REPLACEMENT BAND. WELL, THEY DON'T SELL REPLACEMENTS. THE ONLY WAY YO
LAST JANUARY, I BOUGHT A BUNCH OF BABY THINGS AT TARGET FOR THE NEW GRANDSON ARRIVING IN FEB. THE CLERK SUGGESTED I OPEN A TARGET CHARGE AND SAVE 10%. CONSIDERING THE SIZE OF THE BILL, I SAID OK. I THEN WENT ACROSS THE ISLE AND PAID THE CHARGE OFF. I HAD NO BILL THE NEXT MONTH, BUT I FILLED OUT A CHANGE OF ADDRESS ON THE BACK OF THE COUPON THAT GOES WITH THE PAYMENT. RATHER THAN USE MY OTHER CARD FOR ALL EXPENSES RELATED MY MOTHER-IN-LAW'S DEMISE, I CHARGED EVERYTHING ON THE TARGET CHARGE.
WELL, WE SPENT THE WEEKEND AT MY DAUGHTER'S. YESTERDAY WE WENT HOUSE HUNTING AND FOUND ABSOLUTLEY NOTHING. HAD A WONDERFUL HOMECOOKED DINNER LAST NIGHT, AND SLEPT WITH 2 CATS AND A COCKER SPANIEL. OH, AND MY WIFE WAS SOMEWHERE IN THE BED ALSO. SHE WAS NOT THE COCKER SPANIEL.
MY 7 YEAR OLD GRANDSON (BEN), IS A CUB SCOUT AND TODAY HIS SCHOOL HELD THE PINEWOOD DERBY. FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DON'T KNOW WHAT A PINEWOOD DERBY IS, A QUICK EXPLANATION. EACH KID IS GIVE A BLOCK OF WOOD, AND WITH HELP,
SO YESTERDAY I WENT TO THE INTERNIST. AFTER I RECEIVED A CLEAN BILL OF HEALTH, WE REVIEWED MY MEDICINES. OF COURSE THE QUESTION OF PLAVIX AND ASPIRIN CAME UP, BUT I WAS TOLD IT WAS UP TO THE NEUROLOGIST TO HANDLE THIS TOPIC. I SAID SINCE YOU'RE BOTH IN THE SAME OFFICE, CAN'T YOU FIND OUT. NO, I WOULD NEED TO MAKE AN APPOINTMENT WITH THE NEUROLOGIST. SO AT THE CHECKOUT AREA, I VENTED MY FRUSTRATION, AND EXPLAINED I LIKED BOTH DOCTORS WHICH IS WHY I SWITCHED INTERNESTS IN THE FIRST PLACE. I THOUGH
SO TODAY I TOOK MY WIFE OUT FOR LUNCH. SEATED IN A BOOTH WITH A SENIC VIEW,
I OBSERVED A WOMAN SITTING DIRECTLY BEHIND ME, IN HER MID FIFTIES. ALL WAS WELL UNTIL THE LADY DECIDED TO MAKE A CALL ON HER CELLULAR PHONE WHILE WAITING FOR HER MEAL. SO I LISTENED TO ALL HER AILMENTS, TESTS SHE JUST TOOK AT THE HOSPITAL, AND HER CONVERSATION WITH THE DOCTOR.
I CALLED THE WAITRESS OVER AND SUGGESTED SHE COLLECT THE CHECK BEFORE SHE SERVED THE WOMAN HER FOOD. DIDN'T SOUND LIKE SHE WOULD MAKE IT TH
I CAN'T BELIEVE I'VE BEEN GONE FOR 4 MONTHS AND I'M STILL ON PAGE THREE. IT SURE IS NICE TO BE BACK. THE NEWGRANDSON IS WONDERFUL, BUT NOW WE WON'T GET TO SEE HIM UNTIL SUMMER WHEN WE HAVE BOTH OUR CHILDREN HERE WITH ALL THE GRANDSONS FOR A WEEK OF REUNION.
WITH THE PASSING OF BOTH IN-LAWS WITH 5 MONTHS OF EACH OTHER, THERE IS DEFINITELY A VOID. BUT THE WORRY AND PRESSURE IS FINALLY OFF MY WIFE'S SHOULDERS. AT 91 AND 92, THEY WERE ABLE TO LEAD FULL LIVES.
WE STARTED LOOKING AT TOWNHOUS
WELL, I'M OFF BLOG PAGE 137. WHERE HAVE I BEEN? HERE GOES.
MY FATHER-IN-LAW PASSED AWAY ON 9/11. WE CLOSED ON THE HOUSE SEPT.28, BUT MOVED THINGS OUT SEPT. 23 - 27. EVERYTHING TO UNPACK AND PICTURES TO HANG HAVE BEEN DONE. WE SHOPPED FOR ODDS 'N ENDS, AND THE APARTMENT IS NICE. SMALLER PLACE, NO MAINTENANCE, AND NO IDIOT NEIGHBOR. I HOPE MY EX-NEIGHBOR HAS MET THE TWO DOGS THAT NOW OCCUPY THE HOUSE WITH THE NICE PEOPLE WHO BOUGHT IT. BUT THEN AGAIN THE DOGS ARE MORE INTELLIGENT. THE PEOPLE
I'M HIDING AT THE COMPUTER BECAUSE MY WIFE AND I HAVE BEEN HANGING PICTURES FOR THE PAST TWO HOURS. WE HAVEN'T AGREED ON WHAT SHOULD GO WHERE, HOW TO MEASURE, OR WHAT HANGERS TO USE. THERE ARE NOW FIVE ON THE WALLS, AND I'M PERFECTLY CONTENT TO QUIT, BUT SHE WON'T.
I CAN'T SHOOT HER OR STAB HER. I HATE THE SIGHT OF BLOOD AND BESIDES, I'D HAVE TO RECARPET THE PLACE. I CAN'T PUT HER IN AN ENCLOSED GARAGE WITH THE CAR RUNNING. I DON'T WANT TO RUIN THE CAR. DROWNING, SUFFOCATION, AND CHOKING TA
WELL, ALL DONE. AFTER MOVING BOXES FRI., SAT., SUN., MON., AND TUES., WE ARE POOPED. THE MOVERS CAME MON. AND IT WENT VERY SMOOTHLY. YESTERDAY, WE FINISHED PACKING ODDS AND ENDS AND CLEANING THE HOUSE. WE STOPPED FOR A MOMENT TO SHED A TEAR FOR ALL THE FUN WE HAD WHEN THE KIDS CAME DOWN. I SAY ONLY A MOMENT BECAUSE MY NEIGHBOR'S WIFE CAME OUT AND MY WATCH STOPPED. I WON'T MISS THEM AND I HOPE THEY ENJOY THE TWO DOGS THAT ARE COMING WITH THE BUYER. IT WILL BE ROUGH BECAUSE THE DOGS ARE MORE INTE
WE DISCONNECT THE COMPUTER FOR A FEW DAYS TOMORROW, SO I CAN SNEAK A "QUICKIE" IN TONIGHT.
WHAT A DAY! WE GOT UP AT 6:30, AND SET UP FOR OUR SECOND GARAGE SALE. VERY SUCCESSFUL. A BIG GUY, WITH CUT OFF SLEEVES, TATTOOS, AND A BANDANA CAME IN LOOKING FOR GUNS OR KNIVES. TOLD HIM HE WAS AT THE WRONG SALE. HE LOOKED AROUND AND FELL IN LOVE WITH A CORDIAL SET THAT HAD BELONGED TO MY MOTHER-IN-LAW. HE EXPLAINED HE HAD A CURIO CABINET AND COLLECTED SIMILAR THINGS FOR DISPLAY. GO FIGURE.
IN T
IT'S GETTING DOWN TO THE NITTY-GRITTY, SO BETWEEN MOVING SOME THINGS MYSELF, FINISHING PACKING, AND DISCONNECTING THE COMPUTER, I'LL BE OFF THE AIR FOR A WHILE. THE POOR CAT IS CONFUSED OVER THE WHOLE THING. HEY, HE COULD HAVE BOUGHT THE HOUSE AND STAYED.
MARTY
OOPS, ALMOST FELL OFF THE PAGE AGAIN. THE DAYS ARE SPENT PACKING, EXCEPT FOR MY TIME AT REHAB.. ON FRIDAY, WE CAN BEGIN MOVING SOME THINGS INTO OUR APT., AND THE MOVING VAN COMES MONDAY. WHAT A PAIN!
WE ARE GOING TO FLORIDA AROUND NOVEMBER 1, DOWN TO WHERE HER MOTHER IS. NOW THAT SHE IS ALONE ( EXCEPT FOR AROUND THE CLOCK CAREGIVERS), WE WILL NEED TO FIND A NURSING HOME FOR HER. SO IT'S A WORKING VACATION OF SORTS.
AFTER DECEMBER 31, AND SUCCESSFULLY ROBBING A LIQUOR STORE FOR CASH, WE
I CAN'T GET THE SONG "YOU MAKE ME FEEL LIKE A NATURAL WOMAN" OUT OF MY HEAD. I HEARD IT ON THE RADIO THIS MORNING AND IT'S DRIVING ME NUTS.
SO TONIGHT I'M GOING TO PUT ON A NEW DRESS AND TAKE MY WIFE OUT TO DINNER.
PACKING IS A PAIN. I"M IN CHARGE OF WRAPPING DISHES, GLASSES AND RELATED ITEMS. I JUST LOOK AT IT AS ANOTHER THERAPY EXERCISE. I FIND IT'S HANDY HAVING A LARGE TRASH CAN CLOSE BY. JUST IN CASE, YOU KNOW.
THE WEATHER HAS BEEN BEAUTIFUL, SO WE SQUEEZED IN A NICE LONG WAL
WELL, MY WIFE IS BACK, AS BEAUTIFUL AS EVER. SHE SEEMS FINE AND APPRECIATES ALL THE NOTES OF CONDOLENCES SENT. AT O'HARE, THEY DON'T LET YOU SIT AND PARK AT THE CURB WAITING FOR ANYONE. SO I CIRCLED 10 TIMES BEFORE SHE SHOWED UP. ONLY $20 WORTH OF GAS.
BUT IT WAS AN INTERESTING TIME AT MY DAUGHTER'S. LAST NIGHT WASN'T TOO BAD, BUT THE FIRST THREE HOURS OF THIS MORNING HAD TO BE OUT OF A TORTURE MANUAL. THE SIX YEAR OLD CAME DOWN TO THE DEN WHERE I WAS SLEEPING AT 5:30 AM WITH A FEVER AND BA
WELL, I'M HEADING UP TO MY DAUGHTER'S TO STAY OVERNIGHT. THEY LIVE 20 MINUTES FROM O'HARE AND MY WIFE IS COMING BACK WED. MORNING. SO I GOT UP EARLY, CHANGED THE SHEETS, DID LAUNDRY, IRONED SOME PANTS, VACUUMED, CLEANED THE KITCHEN AND BATHROOM (YES, TOILETS TOO), PUT THE DISHES AWAY, SWEPT THE ACORNS OFF THE DRIVEWAY, AND OTHER MISC. CHORES. AND YOU THOUGHT MARTHA STEWART IS THE ONLY DOMESTIC DIVA.
ACTUALLY I LOOK FORWARD TO THE COMPANY AGAIN. TONIGHT I GET TO PLAY WITH THE GRANDKIDS, AND
GEE, IT'S BEEN A WEEK SINCE I BLOGGED. MY WIFE AND HER SISTERS HEADED FOR FLORIDA LAST SATURDAY BECAUSE THEIR 92 YEAR OLD FATHER WAS BAD, AND BACK IN THE HOSPITAL. SHE WAS TO BE BACK YESTERDAY BUT ON WED., THEY TOOK HIM OFF LIFE SUPPORT AND MOVED HIM UPSTAIRS TO HOSPICE.
ONE DOCTOR CAME IN TUES. AND WANTED TO DO A CT SCAN. MY WIFE ASKED WHAT HE WOULD DO IF SOMETHING WERE FOUND. "OPERATE, OF COURSE", HE SAID. WELL, HERE'S A 92 YEAR OLD, IN VERY BAD SHAPE, HARDLY BREATHING, AND THIS YAHOO WA
BOY, AM I DEMANDING AND A PAIN IN THE ASS. IF I HAD TO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF ON A REGULAR BASIS, I'D QUIT. MEALS HAVE BEEN GREAT, ESPECIALLY DINNER TONIGHT. BBQ PORK CHOPS, DOUBLE BAKED POTATO, CORN ON THE COBB, SALAD AND DQ FOR DESSERT.
AFTER A LEISURELY DAY TODAY, I'M GOING TO WORK AROUND THE HOUSE TOMORROW. LAUNDRY, REMOVING PICTURES FROM THE WALL AND PATCHING THE HOLES IN ANTICIPATION OF THE MOVE.
I JUST GAVE MYSELF A RAISE SO I GUESS I'LL DO THE JOB UNTIL SATURDAY. THEN MY WIFE CAN
WELL I MADE IT THOUGH THE FIRST NIGHT AND DAY ALONE. MADE BREAKFAST WALKED THE OUTDOOR MALL THIS MORNING, HAD LUNCH, READ THE SUNDAY PAPER, WALKED TO THE BEACH WITH NEIGHBORS, COOKED A FANTASTIC DINNER, AND HAVE BEEN ON THE COMPUTER THIS EVENING.
NOT VERY EXCITING, BUT HEY, I DID IT. AFTER YESTERDAY THE SLOW PACE WAS WONDERFUL.
MARTY
WELL SHE'S GONE TO FLORIDA FOR A WEEK. AFTER 15 MINUTES OF INSTRUCTIONS, AVERY GOT INTO OUR DAUGHTER'S CAR AND LEFT FOR O'HARE. THIS WAS AT 2 PM. AT 2:30 SHE CALLED TO SEE WHERE I WAS AND WHAT I AM DOING. OF COURSE, I WAS TRYING TO TAKE A NAP SINCE I GOT UP AT 6 TO FINISH GETTING READY FOR THE GARAGE SALE.
THE GARAGE SALE STARTED SLOW, THEN REALLY PICKED UP. AVERY BEGAN TO PANIC AT FIRST, AND STARTED REDUCING SOME PRICES. I HAD TO TAKE THE MARKING PEN AWAY FROM HER, BECAUSE IF SHE CONTINUED
I'M JUST ANGRY,, SO I'M JUST GOING TO VENT.
BECAUSE OF THE POVERTY LEVEL IN THOSE AREAS AFFECTED BY THE HURRICANE IS SO LARGE, THE HAVE NOTS HAVE EVEN LESS, NOTHING. THE HAVES HAVE LEFT THE AREA, BUT WITH SOMETHING. LOOKING AT THE FACES OF THE VICTIMS, THIS COUNTRY IS SO MIRED IN BEING POLITICALLY CORRECT THAT THEY SEEM TO FORGET THE COMMON MAN. I REALIZE VOLUNTEER EFFORTS TAKE TIME TO ORGANIZE AND THEY ARE TRYING THEIR BEST TO BRING RELIEF TO THESE PEOPLE. THESE ARE THE HEROS.
BACK T
WHAT A WEEK! MY FATHER-INLAW IS BACK IN THE HOSPITAL IN FLORIDA. WE HAVE A GARAGE SALE SCHEDULED FOR SATURDAY. MY WIFE ANNOUNCED THAT SHE WANTS TO GO TO FLORIDA FOR A WEEK, LEAVING SATURDAY. I'LL BE ALONE SO DOES ANYBODY WANT A HOUSEGUEST FOR A WEEK? THE BUYER'S REAL ESTATE AGENT FORGOT TO TELL HIS BANK THAT ALL PAPERWORK HAD TO BE DONE BY SEPT. 8, SO THEY SCHEDULED THE APPRAISAL FOR SEPT. 12. I HAVE A PINCHED NERVE IN MY NECK THAT'S DRIVING ME NUTS.
I'VE BEEN WATCHING CNN AND MY PROBLEMS A
