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Entries in this blog

Still Trying to Blog

Will try this again....maybe the shortened version. Kelly is no longer with us ...let her go end of December. After two years she never could get the buttwiping 101 down right, still preferred taking Gary for walks or to shoot pool as opposed to finishing up the housework she was assigned to do, and was having too many problems in her personal life to focus on her job. We had another agency for approximately 2 months but the new gal never could transfer Gary on her own, so I was stuck her

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Gain Some, Lose Some

Life has it's share of ups and downs. This past month it's been gain some - and I don't mean in a good way. I had a bad month on the scales and I chalk it up to stress eating over every stupid little thing that went wrong. I had a mole removed after the doc thought it looked abnormal, and sure enough the biopsy came back showing abnormal tissue. The surgery to remove the abnormal tissue left me with an ugly big scar across my forearm - going on three weeks and it still looks nasty. We ha

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Hanging In There!

Whenever someone asks "how are you doing?" my typical response is "hanging in there." What else can I say - we have good days and bad days, I'm not going to dwell on the bad days although sometimes I just want to scream "I'm effin tired ...don't I look like sh**t?" lol Haven't blogged in a while because I keep losing the blogs when I try to save a draft - and I don't have the energy to re-type. I've also tried cutting and pasting from a word document to no avail - so that's why you ha

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Emotional About Gary's Stroke?

Yesterday I ran out for a few hours while Kelly was here and then came home, picked up her and Gary and all our gear and we headed to the pool for a few hours before she had to leave. In the rush to get all our belongings, we forgot the bag that had Gary's gait belt, so we didn't even attempt to get him in the pool without it. Instead, we parked him in his wheelchair in the shade next to the building and close to a hose where we could cool him down if we needed to do so.   Kelly and I were swi

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Need a Break from the Heat

July has been a very hot month - very few days under the triple digits and I'm getting a little tired of it. I've had a heat rash under my boobs for over 2 weeks and nothing, I mean NOTHING seems to help. I've tried medicated powders, corn starch, and even diaper rash ointment but the pain and itching continues and I've been avoiding going to the pool because of it - don't need chemicals causing more problems. Enough of this heat already!!!!   It's been a very busy month. Our daughter-in-law f

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11 Yr. Survivor Turns 68 Today

Today is Gary's 68th birthday - he has survived 11 years since his massive brainstem stroke on June 1, 2004 and is thriving. After his last physical in June, the Dr. said the stroke was apparently a one-time life altering neurological event and that he appears to be very healthy and could live a normal lifespan - notice I didn't say "normal life."   From the time Gary left stroke rehab the end of September 2004, he has been at home with me as his full-time primary caregiver. We gradually weane

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Birthday Trip - Las Vegas

We just got back from our trip to Las Vegas. We went for ours and Kelly's birthdays and had a fun time. We left on Saturday with a stop in Flagstaff to grab a couple yogurts, then Kelly drove until we stopped just outside Kingman, AZ where we had lunch at a truck stop. The truck stop experience could have ruined our whole trip, but I refused to let it do so. People who know us understand that Gary still has difficulty with chewing and swallowing, so I have to coach him through the process otherw

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Inappropriate or Not?

Gary was always a man of few words pre-stroke, and still is post stroke, but not by choice. Unfortunately, sometimes the few words that he does speak can at times be inappropriate - he doesn't seem to understand when he can and cannot say them, but he's speaking from his heart even if his brain doesn't understand.   He can be sitting and watching a commercial on television and listening to all the sales pitches when he might blurt out "oh bullshit," and that's okay because it's usually just he

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Clean Bill of Health

My follow-up visit to the Dr. resulted in a clean bill of health. I wouldn't have returned except they refused to give me the lab results over the phone, insisting that I had to meet with the Dr. to get them. As far as I could tell this was just an excuse to collect another co-pay and bilk insurance out of more money. A few levels were slightly above or below the normal range, but nothing to be concerned about, so not really sure why I had to meet with the Dr. I did inform her that I am on the n

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Weighing In

Just updating from my last blog ......We went out to Red Lobster the Sunday following our anniversary since our son, Dan, had given us a gift card and it's always been a favorite place for us to celebrate our anniversary. I had a small meal - grilled shrimp and chicken with rice pilaf, and I ate Gary's salad that came with his huge meal with lobster and salmon. He doesn't do well with salads, but he did manage a few bites of it. Even with his swallowing issues, he can eat like a horse (or pi

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47th Anniversary - April 20, 2015

Tomorrow is our 47th wedding anniversary - my how we have changed. From a young, lively couple in our late teens..early twenties to a disabled older man with a caregiver wife who has been caring for him going on 11 years.............and they said we would never last!! lol   Gary has a caregiver here tomorrow for four hours so I'm taking him out for pancakes today. I can't eat pancakes since I started on Nutrisystem and this is my startup week, so I'll settle for a tossed salad and have m

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Calm and Quiet - We Wish!

We survived the visitors from Colorado. Gary's niece and his brother flew in last week Wednesday. They were going to pick up a large truck for someone at the airport and drive it back to Colorado on Friday. As with all good plans, everything depends on the weather and it changed dramatically in Colorado from the time his niece booked her flight to the day they were supposed to head back. The storm back in Colorado was to last through Monday and driving over Raton Pass, NM would have been treache

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Hoyer Hell

Still waiting on the hoyer lift here....It's been over six weeks since I went to the Dr. for my shoulder pain - frozen shoulder, got the cortisone shot, which is now starting to wear off and not much cooperation with the RX for the hoyer. It took them over four weeks to get a RX to the Home Health agency that coordinates it, then it was incorrect - was written for me as though I were the patient, instead of for Gary. Took another two weeks with me hounding them constantly to get it straightened

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Do I Really Need a Chill Pill??

Is it me, or are there just too many incompetent people employed these days?? I swear either everyone thinks I'm an idiot or they don't care that they're screwing over the public in general. The big bed that I bought the end of January was not the bed I had ordered. When it was delivered, I called and questioned whether it was a mistake and the salesman tried hard to convince me that it was the one that I had selected. It was not - nor was it the brand I had ordered, so after trying to sleep on

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Big Weekend

The rain started on Thursday night....just in time for the Seattle fans to feel right at home as they flew into town for the Super Bowl. By Friday morning, we were getting the waterworks in through the vent in the back bedroom again. This is the fan above where my bed used to sit, but thank goodness I had moved it to the other side of the bedroom for Gary to use until the new bigger bed arrived on Friday afternoon. Unfortunately, I had the futon sitting in that area of the bedroom and it got rai

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Bowl Weeks and Other Stuff

I've been trying to get all my errands done before all the craziness sets in with people coming in for the Pro Bowl and the Super Bowl. We've already had too many crazy drivers on the road with the recent Barrett-Jackson car auction and now the bowl games and the Phoenix Open coming up.   Heard from Gary's niece that she and her husband from Seattle will be in town for the Super Bowl. He went last year when the Seahawks played in New Jersey, but this year they will both be going to the game. L

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Gary's Ear Dr. Appointment

As expected, the ear appointment didn't go much better than my doctor appointment last week. We had to get Gary up early, get him showered, and dressed and out the door for an early appointment.   Kelly sat with Gary while I filled out the forms on an electronic tablet - all the personal info. they needed before the appointment. We were then led back to an examining room, where the assistant asked "what are we here for today?" I told her I made the appointment to have his ears flushed since he

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Long Story, Short Version - Start of 2015

Typed blog early this morning, hit "save draft" button - got "This Page Cannot be displayed", hit back button - it's gone - what else is new??   Got Gary's ENT appt. for Friday this week - hoping to relieve his hearing problems.   Have a possible rotator cuff tear on my right shoulder from too much heavy lifting - went to doc yesterday, got meds and RX for MRI - meds too strong, herbal supplements working better - don't care to be in a fog with upset stomach from meds. Doc screwed up and wr

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What? I Can't Hear You!

I will be glad when the weather warms up enough to get Gary out again. It's been a really chilly couple of weeks and I haven't let Kelly, his caregiver, take him out for walks or over to the clubhouse to shoot pool. The last thing we need is for him to catch a cold and me have to lose more sleep at night caring for him when she's not here.   Christmas Eve Day Gary had a fall first thing in the morning. I had just gotten him out of the shower and let him drive his power chair over to the g

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I Am the Grinch!

I am the Grinch that stole Christmas around here. I have no desire to decorate, put up a tree, or make any plans for the holiday. It's all a lot of work to me and I don't need more work, I need a vacation. My neighbors were busy decorating their front yard last weekend and asked (for the 3rd year in a row) if they could plug some of their decorations into our outside outlet because they didn't want to run a cord across their driveway. I said it would be okay for that day only until after the con

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Long Holiday Weekend

This has been a long holiday weekend for us with having Kelly only 3 days last week and giving her Friday off. That meant I got to shower, shave, dress and feed Gary 4 days straight and even though I've been doing it most of the 10 years since his stroke, I've grown accustomed to having Kelly here 4 days a week to do the difficult part of his care for me. Thursday, Thanksgiving Day, Gary slept in late since he had stayed up to watch Survivor and Criminal Minds the night before. By the time he fi

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Remembering Friends and Other Updates

This past week we lost a friend here in the park. Roger was a very active member of the HOA and worked on all the events in the park with his very active young wife. He was in his early 80's and had been diagnosed about a year ago with leukemia. The last four weeks he had been pretty much homebound with hospice so we knew it was coming, but still sad to see him go. Before being homebound he was still showing up at the Fri. night socials and although movement was slow, he could get out on the dan

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Oceanside and Sea World

We got back late Friday afternoon from our trip. Lucky for me that Kelly did all the driving on the way back as I hadn't slept much the whole time we were in CA and could not have driven for six hours and managed the rush hour traffic that we hit when we arrived in the Phoenix area. We took turns driving on the way out and while in CA, and she got up early the first morning, grabbed the car keys I left on the dining table with a grocery list and $100 bill and went to get all the groceries we nee

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Look Out Beaches - Here we come!

I was hoping to get a good night's sleep before we head out on the road this morning to Oceanside, CA for some serious beach time, but that didn't happen. Every time I plan a trip with Gary, I wonder why I'm doing this again. It never gets easier, and when I don't get enough sleep, it actually becomes dangerous. Thankfully, his caregiver will be going with us on this trip, so I'm hoping she got a good night's sleep and can help with the driving. I got Gary to bed around 8:30 last night, and am d

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Buttwiping 101 and Other Lessons

I thought all caregivers knew and understood the importance of keeping the skin clean and free of sores, scrapes, scratches, etc., but apparently it's not as important to some as to others. I have had to repeatedly remind the caregiver to make sure Gary gets wiped clean after having a BM on her shift. There is nothing worse than putting him to bed at night and smelling leftover mess in that area and then trying to clean it after it's dried and fermented all day while he sat in it. I had t

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