• entries
    12
  • comments
    34
  • views
    2,205

About this blog

One day at a time

Entries in this blog

HostSue and Asha and good deeds

I just read Sue's blog from today. Yearning for what is gone - you have to read it. I have quietly been reading Sue's blogs and leaning on her words more than she knows. Sue you really nailed this one. This blog is your good deed for today - actually for me it is a month's worth. I am printing it - several copies   Asha- I just don't get you yet. I should be supporting you and you are carrying me with the simple gesture of asking if I am ok and knowing that I am not. That simple gesture - rea

Susan M

Susan M

Caregivers should be exempt from getting sick

There has got to be some kind of perk to this caregiver role. I think God or whomever is in charge out there should have pity - if you won't get rid of stroke then at least keep us caregivers healthy, and give us patience, and understanding and strength and the power to heal and I could use a raise right about now too. Is this asking too much? And one more thing if you are listening because I am talking to you and I am told you do NOT need to be in a church for you to hear me(how anyone came up

Susan M

Susan M

Some days are sure better than others

Jackie has settled onto her new floor, new room and new staff. She seems ok with the change. We both are. This staff sees her as someone who has the possibility to get home and this has had a great impact on Jackie. We have arranged for her to get a mug of soup at lunch and dinner because her appetite is returning and this tastes good to her. She has been in the cast for 3 weeks and PT resumed yesterday

Susan M

Susan M

Time flies

Jackie's Xmas eve outing was cancelled. The Friday before she decided she could transfer herself from her chair to bed and she broke her affected leg. She now understands, or at least i hope she does, her limitations as far as safe transfer goes. She has a beautiful purple cast.   Her insurance coverage maxed out and we have moved from the rehab unit to a long term care floor Friday after Xmas. We were both stressed about the change. We bonded with the staff and they with us and change is alw

Susan M

Susan M

Thanks

I am not sure why I started blogging other than some way to get out my feelings and feel safe around those who really get it. I did not expect people to read or comment. I received 3 comments to my most recent entry and was so grateful for them. I do not know you but I know you understand and won't be critical or judgemental. I copied your comments and will read them to Jackie today. I wish she could hear them right from you but this will more than do.   We had a "Family Meeting" today. WE go

Susan M

Susan M

The right direction

We are almost 5 months post stroke and still at the SNS. I get frustrated when I hear about people being home in 2 or 3 months and walking and talking again. I remind myself how large the bleed was and the fact that she was not supposed to survive and she needs time to heal. And healing she is. The doctor was beside himself that she moved her little toe on her affected side - he was very excited and said it was a huge gain. So I spent the rest of the evening staring at her foot - the only thing

Susan M

Susan M

I am not afraid of:

I have been alone in our house for over 4 months now. I guess not really alone. We have a dog and 3 cats. I have faced all that has come my way to keep things maintained and prepared for the winter. I have done things I did not think I could do alone. Then I think about Jackie - she is being cared for but she too must feel alone. SHe has not been home for 4 months. SHe cannot talk to anyone - even me - about her feelings. I wonder if she is there feeling like I do right now.   Since July 14,

Susan M

Susan M

Thanksgiving

So here is what I am thankful for:   Jackie gave me the biggest one armed hug a person could ever get yesterday and I heard her say I love you   My mom is cooking dinner for ME this year.   Jackie's sisters: Patti, Nancy and Kathy - they have kept me sane and they give me strength.   My dog and cats to come home to.   A home to come home to - Jackie's wisdom allows us to keep it.   A secure job and income   For discovering my spiritual side - the hard way but at least I foun

Susan M

Susan M

Second Guessing

All the second guessing is so tiring and probably useless. But I do it again and again. I received a comment to my last blog from Asha - it was a gift. It gave me a whole new perception of one of the "guesses".   Everyday I see Jackie making gains. Mostly cognitive. They seem so small to her when I tell her - she rolls her eyes and frowns at me like I am crazy. She has learned how to change the channels on the tv remote. She knows what to do with the cell phone - put it to her ear and listen

Susan M

Susan M

It has already been written

I have been reading member's post and blogs. There is not much I can write that has not already been written in this wwebsite. The emotions, struggles, humor, experiences - all of it is right here.   This morning I read NoriB's post about her husband and my heart sank. At one point in Jackie's journey she was returned to the hospital - she was severely dehydrated and basically starving. After given fluid and regaining consciousness (after being pretty much unconscious for the last 3 weeks)

Susan M

Susan M

The "P" Word

Yes - I knew it was coming. Yesterday it came with the meeting set to discuss the next steps this Thursday. It has been 4 months with no movement on her right side. Though prepared (thanks to this website and a bit of reality) it still stung. I sat and chewed on the word for a while and then thought "ok, next step of the journey" (Actually I freaked out, cried a bit, had a glass of wine, prayed and then did the "ok" thing). So - here is the good news: She is making good gains in Speech and the

Susan M

Susan M