In God's big plan, why does he see that some survive strokes other do not. It is not just strokes. It's car accidents, heart attacks, Cancer, gunshots, In quiet times my thoughts wonder, why me? Could have just as easily been me that was in the thirty percent that does not survive. When I am at my worst, I scream in my head for an answer only he can answer. "Why did you not take me home then?" I know "When it is your time." is the answer. I guess I was not ready yet. I am grateful fo
Depression is blamed for so many things, and we are told all stroke survivors have some type of it. I think I may have a way to describe the empty feeling the stroke left me with, It's like a schizophrenic must feel. From what I have read about schizophrenia, seems quite similar. I really don't like feeling this way, but doctors only answer is to put me on anti-depressives. They don't really know why they work, except to say it is "believed" they increase serotonin which helps neurotransmi
I thought since I had such a mild stroke, I could deal with it's after effects myself. For over a year after returning to work as a road sales manager, the stress to keep up and empty alone feeling got the best of me and after being called in for a review, I informed my supervisor I refused to drive more than four hours daily in fear of another stroke, was relived of my duties (fired). The following day I had a gran mal seizure. At the time, I did not realize, I brought it, the stress and seizur
In the short time I have been a member of this site, I have come to depend on input from so many of you. I only started blogging so all the echos in my head had someplace to go. But now as I have recieved support, it has lifted me to want to give more of myself. I wish I could lift every survivor and caregiver up and give them a hug of healing. If I can just give one person hope, it's all I can ask. Seems like i feed off encouraging comments. Thank you all. Praying for Blessings all around. Boy,
Life has so many crazy curves it's a little like the , for those that remember, Wild Mouse roller coaster, not fast, but really threw you around. No sooner do we get adjusted to the way things are and along comes some wild jerky curve. Maybe we are all given some burden to carry, but I am trying to get a different slant on life and look at it as instead of burdens but opprotunities to do something to make life a little better. This blog rambles on in so many different directions, it's sometimes
I have written many papers in my lifetime, mostly for sales reports in my working life. When I saw there was an opening for the newsletter, I threw my name at Lin. I was so excited. I could be considered for a writing position. Then after reading some of Chris DeWalt's stuff, I realized, I could not carry this guy's keyboard. Yeah I have loose thoughts blasting about my noodle, but have always had a problem staying on task. Dreamer, nothing but a Dreamer. Always wishing for that one thing I woul
Being a stroke survivor has given me a different perspective on life than most other folks. I have often asked, "Lord, why spare me? Haven't you blessed me enough? God's Grace is impossible to understand. We as humans, get a glimpse of it when we look at our children, but never really understand it. I have spent countless hours angry I had a stroke, when I should have been grateful I was still alive and well as well as and for the insight it gave me into how blessed I have been. Throughout my li
I spent many years working for others, then in 1986, this guy who employed me, fired me for demanding a raise. I had been with him for over 6 years, married, 1 daughter, wife 3 months pregnant with second daughter, hadn
People that have survived strokes, wear the title "Stroke survivor" like a badge of courage, which they should. I sometimes feel like I am not deserving of the title stroke survivor. Though in February 2007 I had a TIA (transient ischemic attack) caused by a tiny blood clot breaking loose from the back of my heart, traveling through an artiel septal defect (an abnormal opening in the wall separating the left and right upper chambers (atria) of the heart) in my heart and up my carotid artery t
