We went to the beach today. Our friend Carl, who comes every Friday night for a visit, wanted to take us out for lunch. I asked my best friend, Chris to join us. Talk about a small world, Chris met Carl at the hospital (Chris is Bruce's Medical Advocate) and come to find out, Carl is one of her customers. Chris and I grew up on the beach in our home town. We traveled extensively together over the past 45 years, but always with a water feature involved. She sent me to my first Poker school in Gul
Interesting week: I was able to move Bruce's special WC delivery up a week and was finally able to get an appointment with the Spasticity Clinic but it is a ways off. As most of you know, Bruce's Neuro told him last week that he probably will not make any more progress. While I know from all of you that this is not true, Bruce is still very discouraged. We go to the pool almost daily and he still does his hour workout, including his laps, but will only walk in the pool or with therapy. Today was
This has not been a good night. Our wonderful Lisa has lost her Ralph. I had started a blog last night, but my darling Kira was kind enough to erase it for me and I was too tired to start again. Tonight it all sounds like just bad whining. Been a month of transition, but a lot of positives. Back in pool. You can tell Bruce had the month off, but while his workout is shorter, he still likes to go and probably is his best therapy. PT started him on the stationary bike, 3 cycles of 10-very painful,
Happy Father's Day all. My Dad was older when he married (30). He was the youngest child of 3 and a change of life baby. He was sent to live with an Aunt and really did not return home to his own family until a teenager. My Grandfather was also in a questionable business, which may also have played in the decision making. He met my Mom, married and had me a year later. I am the first of seven. The babies 10 years my younger are twins. From the get go he adored being a Father. I have no clue what
I hesitate to blog this week because with all the changes, I was not sure where we were at. Bruce has a follow up with all of his Docs this month. PCP was first and he was kind enough to add a sleeping pill. We are at day three and no change yet but nothing earlier than 2:30 am either. Also he complained to a friend just today that he himself feels he needs more sleep. He still can not nap but does rest in bed for a half hour every day. He continues to go to work several times a week for a few h
So, a horrid week. Do I ever have anything other? The advice I have been given by people who I trust and who love us was to let Bruce call the shots about what he is willing to do to recover. We got home Friday after therapy and the news that they were weaning him off around two PM. TV went on. The only thing I did was help when asked and provide food. The TV was on for 48 hours. He lied down in bed twice: once for 2 1/2 hours and once for 2 hours. His right foot and hand after the 48 hours were
I joined Survivor chat last night to get through what is becoming a very difficult week. I am so glad I did. They are so gracious, dealing with their own trials but willing to help us caregivers with a lot of insight and advice. I thank them all. I had had a heads up about Speech discharging Bruce for a good two weeks. She had consistantly said he was progressing beyond anything else she could help him with and I appreciate the fact that she was a professional and was not just out for the money.
Interesting week, I must say. Kind of a mixed bag. Speech discharged Bruce on Wednesday. She will check back with us in a month to see how Bruce is doing. Part of me understands this; his writing has surpassed what she can help him with, he has the tools to find the words he is missing and just has to use those strategies until they become second-nature, he has to practice with the computer keyboard and mouse, which he can do with me and the math will either come or not. He had some trouble with
Well on Thursday PT had Bruce walking in the parallel bars unassisted, including getting up and sitting back down. The bars are there in case he loses his balance, but from the little I saw, his balance was excellent. He thought so too. OT then got Bruce to finally move his arm, backwards, nothing forward yet. She kept asking him to move it and he kept shaking his head no, but being the Pro that she is, she talked him into trying and then he did it-five times, not just a one trip fluke. Am tryin
Well, today was the day. At my wits' end, trying to figure out where we go from here, God sends me an angel. Bruce's boss and friend, who comes every week and was aware of my concern, says last week," Let's do a work day. That's what he wants." After the weekend with the laundry and everything, the three days of prep, and I was already exhausted: hair cut, beard trim, shaving, grooming, clothes, travel bag etc. You all know the drill. After Bruce found out he was going back to work, anytime he g
Well, our pool is going down for a month for new filter and refurbishing. It was supposed to be May 1st but because the parts didn't arrive, Gaylord left the pool open to therapy only for this week. Since I take Bruce in the water and all his therapists said please bring him, I went to the pool Director and asked. He said as long as you come during therapy hours, yes, please come. So today we arrived for our usual am swim. Everyone walks the width distance for walking and everyone wants to be at
Well we all earned our bisquits this week. Kudos to all. What a team! What amazes me is the fact that our individuality shows. We came at some problems from all different angles and often I would be sitting and reading the postings and say to myself "Wow", that never crossed my mind. What a good point. I joined Survivors Chat again last night. That is one brutal group. I don't think I have laughed out loud that much or that long in over a year. Unfortunately my computer was acting up (and I don'
Well the whirlwind week is coming to a close. Last Tuesday two of Bruce's friends from work came to bring dinner and spend time with him. They do this monthly and he loves their visits, plus they love to gossip, so he gets all the dirt. His college roommates from Grad school came and gave me my monthly Saturday off. My sister and niece came also for the weekend and we went to my brother's to meet our first grandniece at 6 weeks old. Need I add that she is just beautiful? My other brother also jo
I am feeling very low tonight. I messed up Bruce's meds big time this week, fortunately no medical issues, but set him back nonetheless. My sister called, funny how insync we are and talked me down. so rather than rant, thought I would share a funny story. Bruce has a size 10 EEE foot and some of his foot bones need surgery. We were going to have the surgery done just before the stroke happened because he was having more pain and difficulty walking. Buying shoes has always been difficult for him
Well, I was waiting to give an update to the Spring Transition, and now I am glad I did. Last two days were horrible and I felt I wasn't in the right frame of mind to assess our progress. Now I am glad I did. Real issue remains the constant TV. Had to take it away Wednesday and Thursday-not working on his work, incontinence, etc. I had said from day one I would not condescend or treat him like a child, but am finding out that may be exactly what I have to do. Anyway, he found another outlet. Bru
I am calling this time period the new Spring Transition. Two weeks ago, Bruce said he no longer wanted any caregivers in his home - he had had enough. I told him I was unwilling to give up Jen taking him to therapy twice a week for me - freeing up some time for me here at home and he agreed. Per our agreement, we reviewed it at one week and Bruce wanted to continue. I remember that first month home when I was on deck 24/7 plus all the house stuff. I literally fell asleep standing up in the kitch
Well, we are at one year and a day. Last night in chat I was asked if I had looked over any of my journal from last year. I did not keep a journal per se, but daily log: notes, follow ups, goals met, etc. Nothing really organized and none of my own thoughts, fears etc. I am not ready to do that yet, it's still too painful. However after a really bad weekend and some very good advice from here, things seem again in transition. Bruce was on the bike for his arm - no resistance yet, but pedalled t
I thought I would get off the stroke topic tonight. I don't know why, it was one of those bad days and I should probably vent, but this may help more. All of you caregivers in chat have heard about her and Sue talks to her and she sits with me every night while I peruse the site and get helpful info. When Bruce and I first started living together, I brought along with all my other baggage, a cat named Ulysses. He soon became Bruce's best friend and Bruce called him Jules. Bruce would play the gu
Bruce and I have been together 26 years last December. In 2006, I, like the entire world, discovered Texas Hold Em on TV. I said to Bruce, "that's statistics and probabilities" (I was a math major in college) and he said "No honey, that's poker." For the next six weeks, every night he dealt himself six hands to my one, until he was comfortable I knew the game. For my birthday my best friend took me to Gulfport, MS to Poker school. When I got back, Bruce reserved a room at Foxwoods, checked me in
Well I'm glad I didn't panic. Bruce spoke with all three of his therapists at my urging. Monday he starts with swim and I told him if he wanted to cancel PT and OT it would be up to him. He spoke with his PT and basically she reviewed what he already knew about losing what he had gained and the increased pain of not moving around. He agreed to go to both sessions. New standard is I am not to be with him. I am to take him, drop him off and pick him up after sessions. Speech is done privately at h
Bruce was post stroke on February 23, 2010. As you all know, he was making incredible improvement. After early am OT on his right arm, still awaiting Botox to kick and swimming for an hour, then 2 hours at home with his CNA; he told me he was all done with everything, ate a candy bar for dinner and asked for help to bed. He was asleep by 7 pm-no medications, no bathroom, no teeth. Thursday morning, no change. He was up at 3-I'd left cereal, which he ate. I made breakfast, but he said all he want
Got a message from Rachel today about my comment on heredity and yes, it is a funny thing to be mad about. Those loving people who brought us into the world also left marks we do not always guess we could have.My first husband could not have children as his Mom was given a drug to help stop her morning sickness. She did not suffer from that with the girls.This woman is a saint. Twenty-five years after her son and I divorced, she still writes and calls on a regular basis and calls me her daughter
Well Bruce is nearing his one year anniversary and I am looking back at the year and the progress he has made. He had a down time just after Christmas when we could not get the long leg brace on. He was walking a city block and then the "tone" kicked in. Botox and Zanaflex have helped and he is now walking with just an AFO and assistance, but we are back in June - slow, painful. But he is at least using the muscles and not depending on a brace to support him. Arm is very slow, but he has made it
