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I have never seen a man in the women's restroom!!???


ruthpill

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I am getting tired of explaining to women , why William is in the women's restroom. We really do not have a choice. The women would rather I went into the men's restroom. but, with the use of urinals in the men's...that is not possible. I am afraid that these same women do not know what a man's restroom looks like. The alternative would be that William would soil himself or we would not be able to leave the house.

 

Some people are so thoughtless. I allready have enough to worry about. I check out the restroom first...I need to make sure that the handicapped one is large enough and has grab bars. I do look for a family one. but alas every building does not have a family restroom. I try to take him in when most of the women have all ready used the restroom. But, it is never enough.

 

This happened on our outing to the Houston Baptist University bible museum. Now you would think that these Christians would be more thoughtful. But, no. They are not aware that a wheelchair bound person could use more help. No doors are help open. Nobody offers to help me carry the lunch trays or to find a seat for us. It is take care of yourself. I must say that William is very lucky that I am able to take care of him. They were all very interested in the Bible museum. But, not acting like Christians!

 

I will continue to take William on the outings because he loves them. I do feel that the other folks on the trip think that he is a big inconvienience. LAST TIME the driver told us that the trips were specifically for people like William ...that is why they have the wheelchair lift on each bus. That encouraged me to continue taking William on the trips.

 

I decided to fix the toilet today. I took the flapper to lowes to get a replacement. They did not have it. He suggested that I try a plumbing supply. Why can't these parts be universal??? After 3 phone calls. I end up calling Lowes afterhour service dept. They take care of the supplies for the Amerisource toilet which is there house brand. Only they sell the parts. Not even the local retail stores carry the parts. The part is on backorder for 2-3weeks. I decide to place an order and wait for the time to get it here. It is only a runny flapper problem. This means that the water drains out of the holding tank and we are wasting water. Anyway ,,,that means in August I should get the part.

 

In the meantime, I am awaiting fedEx. i am hoping that they will show up with the part to Direct TV. Our box went out. I spent time on the phone for 2 days before they decided that i needed a new box. This happened Friday morning.

 

As William says I am the fix it person. I was before William's stroke. So this is not new. But, before I used to make him make some of the phone calls.

 

We had our usual morning pool workout. I told William that I will be working early for the rest of the week. This means no pool unless, I take him in the afternoon or evening. I have to think about that. It is usually too busy with kids ...and William is not very tolerent of the splashing of the children and they are not aware that he is not stable. Not a good combination.

 

Lots done today. Two loads of laundry the dishes and the floor have been cleaned. William is snoozing after our workout.

 

Looking forward to tomorrow.

 

William tells me that he still wants to travel. I told him that my goal is another 2 years. I need to have him walk by himself. We always need those goals.

 

Ruth

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Ruth,

 

I have a response for anyone who has comments about me taking Gary into a women's restroom. I would ask "would you prefer that he leave a puddle on the floor outside, so you can slip in it and sue the establishment?" Shuts them up in a big hurry!! Until they have walked in your shoes or peed in their own pants, they will never get it because it's not their problem.

 

I'm glad that you are strong enough to continue with the outings with William in spite of the intolerance. I'm good at ignoring most of it, but some days I let it get to me also. I know that I could never treat people the way that some have treated us since Gary's stroke, but they have to live with themselves and karma can be a real "B" itch!

 

We once had a security guard waiting outside the women's restroom after someone probably reported hearing Gary laughing in the women's room. As soon as I wheeled Gary out past him, he stood with his arms crossed and took one look at Gary and said "oh, okay, no problem ma'am." I said "there better not be." Within a few months, they installed a family bathroom at that casino. lol

 

Sarah

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Ruth,

 

I wouldn't worry a bit about what those Baptist women say. I've been a baptist all my life and over the years in several states and countries overseas, I have know many of them to act like little devils where men are concern...You know what I mean?

 

When they see you guiding William to a stall it should register to them he is your disable husband or perhaps your disable dad! He ain't there to watch them pee in another stall...give me a brake! He is not there to commit a sex act and can hardly walk without you holding on to him!

 

They done so much dirt in their lives they think others are like they were then. I hate when men or women act like that in a public place. Then if you got out a urinal standing by the bus or car letting him use it they think that is "Just so wrong!"

 

That's why I use my urinal standing inside by back door of the car and when I finish I empty it right there! I'm not going to wet my clothes no time. In Germany cars pull over anytime and the women squat the men stand and use it right there with cars flying by on the autobahn (highways)! Nobody cares one bit! :big_grin:

 

He still wants to travel? OK, you are due to visit me in Killeen staying at my house and meeting my wife, you met my daughter when we visited you all! I think he'll enjoy being here and going on the Army post getting in the big pool and sauna. There is a huge gym with all kinds of machines for workouts. Then we have a senior citizen center not far from my house, it's all free! :happydance:

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Well Ruth, you know you would get some replies on this topic. LOL I wish I could get Larry TO USE THE WOMEN'S BATHROOM! I had a similar experience when we were at the Botanical Gardens and Larry had to use the BR. One of the staff members closed off the BR while I took Larry in. When we got out we got a few stares from those waiting. When we went to the concert a week ago, Larry's friend went in with him until they got to the stall. Larry said he could take it from there and he did. I thought "wow, maybe we are making progress"! However, after church Sat. he refused to use the men's which had a handicapped stall! I said I would wait outside the door. No go! As you say, there are few "family BR's" and I have only seen them in the mall here. It is a delimma and people don't understand that they may be in the same situation some day. Anyway, it sounds like you are enjoying the summer with William which is all that counts.

 

Julie

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Ruth, Good for you. Those people you speak of are just ignorant. We need to forgive them and educate them. Until it happens in your own back yard will you understand.

I liked Sarah comment.

Ruth your still giving William the goals and he keeps reaching them. It's good that William want to travel. remembertolaugh, Jeannie :cocktail:

 

P.s. The Toilet problem I have the same problem with the water keeps running so I use the shut off below the tank.

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Ruth: I knew when I read the title that there was trouble brewing! So far, I have not encountered any difficulties taking Bruce into the Ladies. But, then again, I do not travel like you both do.

 

I had a fix it week too and like you, spent most of the time on the phone. You want to send a repairman to tell me at $100.00 minimum that I need new batteries. I just said, get me a tech on the phone, that is ridiculous. If you do the problem-solving diagnostics included in the manual, there has to be someone there who can tell me what comes next, without having to come out. Sears diagnosed the washing machine, on the phone, gave me a price and had it fixed in 20 minutes. Yes, I can read! LOL

 

Am so glad William continues to improve every day. You work so hard, I admire your strength and willingness to just to do what is best for him. Not back down, get discouraged. With Jen stepping up, I have not taken Bruce swimming in a few weeks. I concentrate on the stuff here at home and of course his work. I am finding if I go slow and include him in all decisions, he will step up. Good week, talk to you tomorrow-Debbie

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