• entries
    8
  • comments
    5
  • views
    1,862

Unable to deal


Guest

316 views

Would you be angry that I'm selfish? I take all that she has been through and digest and swirl internally and then what do I do??...shut down, don't deal. How common is this? I was by her side every evening in intensive care...visited once when she was in acute rehab and have yet to visit her at the nursing home. Surely she knows...surely she is disappointed (as is my family) in that I've not visited her.

 

Thank you Vicki for chatting with me in the Lobby of the chat rooms. I've been on-line on and off getting more information off the websites. The idea of a guest book and the three ring binders to organize her paperwork were the best.

 

Rita, my best friend...had a stroke on November 12th....at the age of 48. You know what is so irritating??...I haven't a clue what is involved with strokes. Ask me about heart disease??...I'm an expert. A photographer I once worked for had a stroke and I saw his partner in business/wife in the grocery store one day and she told me about his stroke. She look different....scared...disoriented...resigned? Not the same energy level as when I worked there. That was my whole experience with strokes prior to November 12th. When I visit Rita, we do this stupid 'chatter' for about 10 minutes...I can't stand it, it's so 'fake'. I check out her bed, the cards on the wall, watch tv, ask about therapy, and then we both start crying.

 

Molly is cool though. She bought a Scrabble game and they both played late one Friday evening. I'm jealous that she can go on with this and not be so emotional. Today, Chris and his girlfriend are taking a Johnny Depp movie to watch today. (This is so unlike me to not get involved!)

 

My sister is disappointed in me. Knowing what good friends were are, that I've not become involved more in this event in Rita's life. Why is it so much about me?? This sucks

0 Comments


Recommended Comments

There are no comments to display.

Guest
Add a comment...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.