My husband and i had just returned from an extraordinary river cruise in Europe two days before. I was ready to go back to work and get back in the swing of things but i had caught a cold on the way back home which was quickly turning into bronchitis. Coughing, coughing, coughing. My husband was outside doing chores in the yard. Should i call the doctor or should i just suck it up. Coughing, coughing, coughing. I was coughing so hard i was choking. I went into the bathroom because that is what you do when you are sick. I coughed so extreme that i thought i was going to have a stroke if i didn't stop. I don't know where that thought came from. And then it felt like my whole head exploded. That lasted a very short time and i became very sleepy. . I looked at the toilet and decided that i could lay down there and go to sleep. It seemed like it would be awkward and not too comfortable but when you are super sleepy it made sense. The next thing i know my husband is there telling me to smile and to raise both my arms. I thought i did both fine. Oooooops. I was wrong. Next he told me to put my arms around his neck and dragged me out of the bathroom. For some reason i couldn't get my left arm to work. But no big deal. I was calm and didn't really care. He was holding me on his lap and I was resting comfortably. He said he was calling 911 because he thought i had a stroke. And i thought he was crazy. I felt fine, sleepy but fine. When he started talking to 911 i became upset with all his foolishness and told him to hang up immediately. Then i really got upset when he gave them our address and directions to ourhouseand started screaming, " Don't tell them where we live or they'll come out to our house." Can you spell Denial with a capital "D". You may have to be a woman to understand this next part but it felt like my pants were pulled down and the last thing i wanted was a group of young good looking EMTs and fireman to show up in my bedroom with my pants pulled down. I kept yelling at my husband to pull up my pants and he kept ignoring me.Finally i felt hands on my hips tugging at my clothes. By this time i was truly annoyed and started slapping at the hands. Then a deep male voice which did not belong to my husband whispered in my ear, "Mam, i'm just trying to pull your britches up." I cooed sweetly,"Thank you." I don't recall ever seeing the EMTs, or the ambulance ride to the hospital. I don't remember the hospital until i was on the heliport being transferred to a Life Flite helicopter. I do remember opening my eyes to read the logo on the helicopter so i would know who i was travelling with. I'm not sure i knew why i was being medivaced to a different hospital but knew i must be in serious trouble. I felt peaceful and calm. My only concern was whether or not i was going to ride inside the chopper or in an airlift basket on the outside. If i was going to be on the outside i wanted to ask for extra blankets since it would most likely be windy and cold. I asked if the helicopter provided wine service for the passengers ( i work for a winery ). The nurse and pilot seemed amused. I thought it was a reasonable question. I wonder if i was on drugs at that point. I had a strong sense of peace and well being. As we lifted off i remeber thiinking about near death experiences and the famous light at the end of the tunnel beckoning you to the otherside . I decided that if i ended up in that scenario it would be best to make up my mind if i was going to follow the light or not rather than at the last moment making a rash decision. I was curious what was on the otherside and what heaven looked like. But on the down side, i might be choosing death and not come back. It was important that i choose wisely and cosider all the pros and cons. It was a dilemma that i might be faced with because i knew i was in grave danger. I made my choice but the light never appeared and so i am alive.

I don't recall landing in Portland at the hospital or the ER or Ct Scan, MRI, Angiogram, or anything. The next thing i know i am talking to a Neurologist and he is asking me why i am not very friendly. Duh? I don't know where i am or what is going on and he wants me to be chatty? A week follows in the hospital where i remember some but not all. At some point i learn that i had a sizeable brain hemhorrage in my right motor cortex and that i am paralyzed on my entire left side. I dont know who told me or how I reacted.