A friend asked if I could write something for her 6th grade students about life after a stroke. It took me some time to agree but I decided education beats ignorance every time.

Yes, I am aware that you have some basic misconceptions about strokes; I see them on display every day. Hopefully you will never have to deal with the challenges that come with a stroke, they are not for wussies and while I and others who have had strokes continue to improve, it is a lifetime challenge for us.

Let me start by pointing out that I was not rendered stupid nor otherwise had my intellect downgraded. What did happen is my short term memory and some other executive functions were negatively impacted. Essentially I have trouble remembering phone number, addresses and what my wife would like me to get at the store. My long term memory is fine and I still know how to do my job, I just do it differently now. An example is the notepad I carry everywhere, that serves as my short term memory now. Some of my memories are gone forever if they were stored in the parts of my brain where some cell death occurred, so if I react strangely to a ‘historic’ event, that may be why. When you lose memories like that you have no realization that a gap exists because to you it never happened. So please bear with me, what you see could be called the V2.0 model as my new reality unfolds and an entirely new chapter in my life is being written almost daily.

Another cognitive function impact is over stimulation. Things you consider normal are a challenge to me, which sometimes can cause severe problems. I no longer go to lunch with my team, I wish I could but the amount of sensory input in a restaurant is overwhelming to me, I can no longer process conversing, ordering, eating, background noises and visual distraction. Once I get to the point of overstimulation my brain stops processing input. I go into an uncommunicative state and withdraw into myself; it can take hours to days for me to recover. This can apply to many situations, like grocery shopping.

Physically I am also somewhat challenged, I now have variable degrees of coordination and my fine motor control suffers. The right side of my body is partially paralyzed, not badly but enough to cause issues. Writing is now very difficult and requires almost total concentration, typing is very difficult, it took me two hours to get this far. A far cry from my prestroke typing.

You would be surprised how much feedback your body requires to function. If your hand is numb you can’t feel the pen you are holding, of the cup of coffee…you drop things and develop a fear of things like knives because your motor control is erratic and the possibility of injury is ever present, you might not even be aware you hurt yourself. Just trying to use a fork and spoon is an exercise in determination…I’m relearning how to do the things I learned from age 2 to 5. So if I decline to go out to eat with you, be relieved, my dining skills are not the best.

These are only a few of the results which stroke survivors deal with daily. I consider myself lucky to be walking and able to perform daily activities although they take much longer than they used to. In that regard I am much more fortunate than some of my stroke brethren who are wheelchair bound or worse. There but for the grace of god…If you know someone with a brain injury, simple acts of kindness like opening doors, etc. are much appreciated. To my stroke survivor brethren I say keep on fighting, today might be the day you master a new old skill and get to revel in the warm glow of success.