when we went on our vacation to India got great news of one of the family member which filled our heart with so much joy that I still smile thinking about that great news, & while coming home from India we got worst news on our whatsapp message which rattled both hubby & me no end & it tears me up every time i think about it I still can't believe death of our spiritual teacher with whom our paths crossed right when I felt like I was drowning  in grief of my stroke  & disability & changes that brought in our life. he was our guiding light to get us through that dark tunnel journey. you know meeting him & bumping into right books at the right time has made me believer of statement teachers will always appears when student is ready. I know for me he was my teacher who helped me navigate those dangerous water of my life's journey.  we have known him for last 15 years, so his death news was totally unexpected, he is renowned teacher of our spiritual books with whom you can discuss things you are trying to understand in life & he will explain in layman's terms without any arrogance of his knowledge or anything. right after my stroke when I was struggling with my self worth issues & my constant struggles with kido in trying to make him try new things & his fights & not getting any thanks in return for trying my best but rather how I was such a pain mom was making me one very frustrated mom & I had asked our teacher how do you find joy in thankless job of parenting or being wife whose husband will only comment or talk if things have not gone wrong in my dish.  his response to my self centered query was brilliant, he just said do your duties as offering to God & you will never expect thank yous in return. It was one of the light bulb going in my head at that time.  I should do my duty as wife & mom with full integrity & good intention without any returns, & I will get my returns when I see my son & family happy & successful in his life. today I know that's the case, so I feel hugely indebted to our spiritual teacher & feeling loss of his life immensely, I still can't believe I will never see him again :(, but I know he has left legacy of 100s of people whose life he has touched in past. he was instrumental in staring summer camp in temple near our home  & starting all these hinduisim classes where adults can meet & discuss all our old scriptures. I know 100s of kids & adults have taken advantage of these great things in our temple in last decade. I was there volunteering till my kido was there in the system, & thanks to that we have been associated with very like minded people in our neighborhood. Even today hubby & I both go & attend one of the classes offered by temple in our neighborhood.  something I look forward to every weekend. I had to write this to get off my chest & mind this news.

Asha