I used to be an artist before the stroke. I was a newspaper photographer for a while, and then at age 49, I tried painting. I went out and bought some artist supplies, and just started painting. I had no training and no idea what I was doing. I just did it.

What prompted me to try was somebody else calling me an artist. She was referring to my photography, but she took me by surprise. "Oh, you are an artist so you know what I mean," she said offhandedly. I thought to myself, "I am?"

I tentatively showed my first painting to a very good friend of mine, and to my surprise she loved it! She said, "I didn't know you could paint!" Neither did I. I was more surprised than she was.

I immediately went out and bought all kinds of art supplies; polymer clay, dried flowers, more paints, stencils, etc. etc. etc. I went crazy at Wal-Mart, which is not the best place in the world to buy art supplies, but I didn't know any better. I must have spent over a hundred dollars which, if you know Wal-Mart, is a lot of art supplies. Then I found a real art supply store, and I was hooked. I tried to limit myself to spending only $30 a month, but I frequently went over my budget.

Then I had the stroke. The stroke was on my right side, and since I am right-handed, I felt robbed. I had just discovered the artist in me, and then I couldn't use my right hand anymore. It is been almost four years, and no matter how hard I try, I just can't seem to get fine motor control back into my right hand. I have been working at it really hard, but to no avail. Life was not fair.

Two things happened to change my mind. I discovered a young artist on eBay, Gintare Bruzas, who has inspired me again. I positively love her work. I have bought two paintings from her so far, and I noticed that she has more paintings up for auction! I am working on buying two more, but since I am on Disability, it will not be easy. I have tried to limit myself to $30 a month for eBay purchases, but you know how that goes. I was unable to stay within my budget when I was buying art supplies! What makes me think I can stay within the $30 a month budget for eBay?

Stroke Connection magazine came in the mail last week. For those of you who get Stroke Connection magazine, you know what the lead article was. "Palette For a New Life - Creative recovery through art."

I read the articles twice. Needless to say, they were very inspirational. I couldn't believe that other artists have had strokes, also! I don't know why, but it just never occurred to me! I am so self-centered. I thought I was the only one.

I am just going to have to learn how to paint left-handed. I will get the Saebo arm training device, and continue to work on my hand. I still miss my right hand, and I don't want to completely give up on it. But I am not going to let anything keep me from my art. If worse comes to worse, I will just sign all of my artwork "Lefty."

And I promise to stay under $30 a month for art supplies.