Today is my first blog. I need to blow a little steam and then I'll be fine. This stroke has changed our lives so radically. My husband (Topper) wants to get back to work I would love for him to get there. He travels and I don't know how that is going to happen. He had an intercranial bleed a year ago and his left side is still paralyzed. He is so bored with our life. He is able to use the phone and the computer and he can talk and think pretty logically. He sometimes has trouble with processing fast and he is easily distracted.

My next issue is that in February we were told he would have to go to a nursing home unless I had someone at home 24/7 to help. My daughter and her husband and brother in law moved in to help. I appreciate this so much but they are beginning to styfil us. My son in law is trying to start his own business which he is able to do at home. The problem is that that took the 24/7 very seriously. As a result my husband and I have not had a moment alone in a year. We have to make doctor appointments therapy appointments around my son in laws schedule. I had to give up my pets because they are allergic to them. We tore up all my carpeting because the pet dander was there. My grandchildren can only come over by appointment. They no longer have the rooms that they have had since they were little. We can not go anywhere without someone with us. I bought a ramp van hoping that would give us a little freedom. It doesn't. I have to wait to get him out of bed until someone is ready to come watch. They are late sleepers so we don't get my husband up until about 9 am on week days or 11 or 12 on weekends. As a result he stays in bed and watches TV from about 7am. Topper can get out of bed by himself while I stand by to make sure nothing moves like the chair or bed. He can also get back into bed by himself. We are not allowed because there would be heck to pay if he fell and it would be my fault. The only thing I have trouble doing is getting him on the toilet. He is still a little wobbly and I have a hard time holding him and administering his pants removal etc. He is 6'3" weighs about 200 lbs I am 5'1" and I'm not skinny. Most of the time I do fine and so does he . We just feel like we are suffering from cabin fever once in a while. My son in law is a bit controlling and We knew that before he moved in. We appreciate all that they have done for us but we get tired of our food being monitored our goings and comings monitored and our lives total out of control. I think I've blown off enough steam I feel better now I'll be back again.