I was trying to think of something to blog and it came to me today on the news...Plavix and ASA combination more harmful than helpful. Here I am taking this stuff for the last 6 months and beating myself up (with the help of my doc) because my cholestrol increases to 253 from 171 (it wasn't even high before the stroke). One would be left to belive I have done nothing since my stoke besides laid back eating and sleeping living the good life because I don't have to work. Now that I think back to my docs visit last week, before the report was released TODAY, how he felt I was not compliant and that I need to continue taking Lipitor (because I was hoping to stop taking so many meds) change my diet, and get moving.

MAN-OH-MAN :Argh: I can't wait to call him tommorrow. I know I could stand to lose a few pounds but I'm not obese, I try to be conscious what I eat and it's not that I sit on my A** watching the stories all day. Granted I don't work :notworking: because I am okay financially (for now) and I am trying to live life a little. I like being home..."SO WHAT"...I've spent the last 15 years working and going to school to have the life that I have and if it wasn't for the stroke I probably would not have even realized that I finally arrived at the point I was trying to achieve. I'm home with my son finally, and he is 15. I can't get those precious moments back with him growing up. I vowed to never work that hard again, time flies.

I'm getting this attitude that I am 35 live in my "OWN" home and don't ask anyone for nothing. So who was I trying to prove something to? I haven't found the answer. There is no one here saying move it, get over it. I've learned if someone wants to comment on my progress I have this go to BLANK, BLANK, BLANK attitude well you get the picture. I can either hang up on them or get up and go home.

WHEW :Rant-On: this felt good venting. I think tommorrow after I take my son to school i'm going to come straight home, not run any errands unless I want to... lay here in my pajamas till I can't take it no more (Pam you would be proud). I finally figuared out no one knows if I ever leave the house unless I tell them anyway. I have come along way since I started blogging and chatting with a few members. You will never reach acceptance because we constantly try to prove ourselves to others. Others have to except this is me take it or leave it. And that came with reconditioning myself...I was constantly trying to be perfect in others eyes weather I was happy or not.

Shelia :happydance: