Well here I am another morning after a sleepless night. Now I know the routine I will remain awake for fear of napping throughout my day thinking it will cause sleepless nights and the headaches...problem is I don't sleep anyway. It's like a vicious cycle I can't break.

I had a brief conversation with my mother this morning while taking my son to school. I don't know if I am cranky from the sleeplessness, but my God how does one person know EVERYTHING :uhm: ? I was talking with her about my nights where I don't sleep, not asking for "ANY" advice just talking...well of course she started.

First, she says there is the possibility of mold in my home or room because I mentioned my headaches start only when I "LIE" down in my bed at night, not when I'm watching TV or working on the computer but "LIE" down (well i"m sure you get the picture)...anyway I am trying to tell her what is feels like because I do suffer from siniuses but she keeps cutting me off, so in a very irritated tone I say, "My room is clean the windows and window seals are clean so dust, spider webs, black spots indicating mold so on so forth I notice are clean".

Secondly, there is the cat maybe it's her...now I have had Diamond for almost a year not to mention "WE" had cats when I was younger never a problem, but once again in my irritated tone I remind her, then once again with her know it all self she says "Maybe her sleeping in the bed is the problem (like I don't change or shake me sheets) Diamond does shed some but I don't wallow in her pet hair. I try to keep her bushed so there is minimal cat hair...I would freak out if I saw it in the kitchen, so I don't ignore it. Thing is Diamond has free roam of the house (except for the tables) so she is not ONLY in my bed, I hold her throughout my day I feel it's therapeutic "HELL" I even suggested she gets a pet to decrease her depression because she's making me depressed...I hold her on the couch, in the basement wherever I love my kitty. Now she still just hasn't stopped to listen not once, I'm just trying to say, :Furious: "I HAD A SLEEPLESS NIGHT WITH A HEADACHE".

Thirdly, she ask do I vaccum :cleaning: ...MAN-OH-MAN now I am heated :Explode: , granted I don't vaccum everyday beacause I don't have to, we aren't pigs, so yes I clean my floors. I wanted to say I'm a housemother my home is clean, HELL she was here the other day and commented on how clean my house is. I clean everything, I mean I love "get this" love my Swifter Duster and Clorox Clean-up spray, not to mention those are MY chores and the least I could do being home most of MY day is clean. I don't mind cleaning it's therapeutic I think better when I clean...I clean better when I think.

So needless to say, I tell her..."I'm in the house, bye" short and sweet. Well I hope you take the time to read this, I know most of the survivors (including myself) have trouble with concentration and reading, break it up and read a little at a time if you must. It just feels better getting it off my chest, I just want someone to know 'I HAD A SLEEPLESS NIGHT WITH A HEADACHE" :bouncing_off_wall: . I would feel bad if she ever read this because I know how she worries about me since the stroke, but I wish she would just learn to "listen"...I just wanted to say "Hey, i've been up all night with a headache" no elaboration on the subject just part of a conversation, I am an adult I know how to take care of myslef if I need any help I am "learning" how to ask not try to bare the pressures alone.

Well I going downstairs to get Diamond get back in the bed and pray for sleep. To all who read this have a good day.

Shelia