Mom had to drive into town today to check her mailbox and pick up some things she needed. I went with her to help her, go into the stores to get what she needs. She stays in the car with my little boy. They have a good time. Danny misses her a lot. Got her mail, went to Wendy's and ate inside. I noticed what a huge effort it all is for her. She does well with the cane for balance. Her driving is as good as it's always been, but she has a hard time feeling the clutch - she popped it a couple times. I pretended not to notice, she knows. The town is full of cherry trees, all in pink blossom. Buds are popping out everywhere, Spring is finally reaching us here. She comments on how pretty everything is, how grateful she is for being here. I feel grumpy. I am feeling like I can't stand to see her like this. I want to cry. I want my old mommy back. She admitted she asked herself on the drive in why God did this to her. She said she yelled at herself for that one, she knows better. God did not do this to her, it just happened and there were lessons in it for her. One of them, to slow down and do the things she has wanted to do. She wants to write, she wants to help people. I feel selfish for my feelings. I'm just really, REALLY angry that this has happened to such a good person. Maybe it's better that I am the one having the negative feelings. She is optimistic. She is that way. Sorry guys, I just needed to vent. It's been a helluva year, and it only started. My husband's dad died in January, mom's stroke was last month and my grandmother is getting ready to go. Well, gonna finish this pity party and get on with the rest of the day.