Jan,

This is going to sound like strange advice, given your young age. But you should look up one of those senior pamphlets about safe driving and start driving accordingly. It might take some of the fear out of driving. I've had panic attacks while driving since my first day in driver's training. When my dad was getting older, I took him and his girlfriend to a senior driving class that they gave at his local VMD and I've been driving with their suggestions every since and it does helps. I'll always hate driving though. On the news recently I think it was UPS that had adapted one of the senior rules for their drivers---never make left hand turns, route yourself so you don't have to make them.

Jean

Great comments Jean.

Jan,

I had to go through a drivers ed program after my stroke. If you can find one and afford it, it might help. The instructor was very tough on me and I was worried I might not pass, but I did and became a better driver for it. About a year later we moved to another state and I had to learn to drive in a new town. That was difficult too. I still won't drive on the freeways at rush hour or drive to downtown. I'm still a nervous driver. I hope that gets better with time. Maybe you can find a new less traveled route. I know for me I would be willing to take more time to get somewhere and be more relaxed when I got there. I really like the idea of no left turns and things like that. I suppose that things like hiring a driver or carpooling have been considered and ruled out. When will your child be old enough to drive? Mine drives herself now and that really eases the burden. Now I just go to the store and the doctor when I feel like it and its not crowded or raining or anything. Baby steps here too I guess. Good luck and safe driving!

Marden

Yes the rehab had to test me to drive to let me drive but it seems like those two accidents scared me cause I notice that if I don't do something regularly then I lose confidence...Weren't you scared for your kid turning 16?. Scares me for him and lickety split drivers on the road who think they own it.

I'm 46 and seemed to go thru menopause early and have anxiety about scary or risky things.

I had stroked because of a chiro treatment that tore my artery. So a dr asked of fears cause that would be traumatizing how it was caused. Its that old you look fine so you should be fine and fearless...no being cautious..

Even when my kid had kind of a faster than safe driving instuctor who liked them taking corners fast even my kid felt uncomfortable and I said you need to feel like you have your vehicle under control but then he thinks when I drive things won't have cars move unexpectedly like going straight when they have their turning signals on and you turn on their information...I've gotten better, I use to drive with sweaty palms, we just have a congested Nascar kind of area...I am careful for others cause this is a good size car...thinking of me as well as them....

I was 46 when I stroked too. The drs couldn't find anything other than hbp as reason for stroke. I was very worried about teaching my daughter to drive , but she was my third. She took drivers training (in car) with a private driving school. I just did the practice driving with her.( it was good for both of us) I also had help from my son, he's five years older. Maybe you two can practice in some out of the way place until you both feel more comfortable( we used the parking lot at the community college on sundays for a while). It's very hard to drive well if you are timid. Maybe you can take a class in defensive driving. Car accidents are scary. It helps to have a medium or large car with an air bag. I have found that used european cars are good starter cars.

Be confident and safe, happy driving!

Marden

Sometimes I just hate the places my mind goes...but here goes anyway - and you can be mad at me if you want!!

My advice to you is from my experience. I rode the school bus everyday my entire school years. (Sounds like walking 7 miles uphill both ways in a blinding snowstorm, doesn't it?) My sons also rode the school bus everyday until they got their own transportation. I know they didn't like it, and they begged to be taken to school and/or picked up after school. I don't know what's happened over the years, but the lines going into any school have grown steadily until just getting in and out of the school yard is dangerous. It isn't because parents have more time - it's because we don't seem to want to hear our kids grumble.

You have a valid reason for not getting out into the traffic - especially in the morning. I'd really, really suggest coming to some agreement about using the bus at least for the morning commute. You aren't being a bad parent because you do it - and I know there ARE other kids who are required to take a bus. If this is absolutely out of the question, is there anybody else your son can ride with? Even if you have to pay $5 a week for gas it might be worth it for your peace of mind. (I know, it's a toss-up between driving and letting him ride with another teen, and I know that here in North Carolina there is a limit on the # of kids who can ride in a car driven by a driver under 18.)

I have the same frustrations about driving the speed limit on our busy streets here and continually being passed by and being the recipient of some nasty glares. I have just decided though that I'll go no more than 7 mph over the limit and if others want to pass me, so be it. I've had my share of speeding tickets, so now it's time for the kids to have their shot at it!!!

Hope you can find a fix!

Ditto to Ann's comments.

Jean