It's been a long two years. Rolly and I are both currently on antidepressants. But we're hanging in there, and some days that's all you can ask.

Here's something I wrote for a friend's emag. Tomorrow is Rolly's 2 yr "stroke-a-versary."

On April 1, 2005 my husband, who had just turned 58, had a stroke.

On our last "normal" day together we went to dinner at a new restaurant, watched a little television, and went to bed.

My husband tells me (I slept through this part) that he woke up about 11pm because he smelled something burning. He looked outside but didn't see anything, and went back to bed.

About 2am he woke me up, saying something was wrong. He was dizzy, couldn't walk without stumbling, and had what he described at the worst headache in his life. We sat up in the living room for a couple of hours, seeing if he would get better (He'd had one previous episode where his blood pressure spiked and I took him to the ER. At least that's what they said it was. Symptoms were similar, but not as severe. I think he may have suffered a first stroke back then).

We went back to bed for an hour or two, and when we woke up he was no better, so I took him to the VA clinic when they opened at 7:30am. They immediately assessed him and sent him to the local imaging clinic for an MRI. The technician there was not very supportive when my husband started to freak out. I asked if they could sedate him so they could proceed, but they told me no. We went home, stopping to tell the doctor what had happened. He said he would have ordered sedation if the tech had called. I tried, what more could I do? So they said take him home and if he got worse over the weekend, take him to the ER. Monday afternoon he had an open MRI. He was still scared, but they let me sit on a chair and hold his hand through the procedure. It was after the VA clinic had closed by now, and so we went directly home. About 5:30pm the doctor called me and says he'd had a stroke. I remember my response "Oh, really?". He told us to be back at the clinic first thing in the morning.

He had some trouble walking the first couple of days, but no paralysis, no loss of speech or body functions. And as I told my girl friends, he didn't drool! (~_~) Sometimes if you don't find the humor in the situation, it becomes way too overwhelming and depressing.

He tried to drive that first weekend, before we knew it was a stroke. After he ended up on the wrong side of the road, going the wrong way, he pulled over and I drove (if you knew me, you'd find that amazing--I avoid driving whenever possible). But stroke changes you, not just the person who suffered it, but the caregiver, too.

It does get easier, but every day is a struggle.

Now I know that he had four of the five warning signs of a stroke. We waited five and-a-half hours before seeking medical treatment. The doctor told me if it ever happened again, he needed to be taken to a hospital within the hour, to prevent more extensive permanent. damage.

Knowledge is power. Be prepared! The following information comes from the National Stroke Association website (www.strokeassociation.org)

Stroke is a medical emergency.

Know these warning signs of stroke and teach them to others.

Every second counts:

Sudden numbness or weakness of the face, arm or leg, especially on one side of the body

Sudden confusion, trouble speaking or understanding

Sudden trouble seeing in one or both eyes

Sudden trouble walking, dizziness, loss of balance or coordination

Sudden, severe headache with no known cause

Call 9-1-1 immediately if you experience symptoms!

Time lost is brain lost!