when I left the hospital I will admit I was frightened, not of death but living. I had always enjoyed fairly good health at least in inconvenience to me, sure I had diabetes, and high blood pressure and high cholesterol, but it didn't affect me that much.little did I know what was happening in my head. my first warnings were before my first tia, my hands would go numb but I also had carpal tunnel, so just shook it off, next i had a tia, including partial paralysis, also affecting my face, nut it quickly, came back, within a week my face and arm was back, and I never lost my leg. but was a big scare, I had only been in hospital to have babies before then, within 3 weeks I had the big one. I woke up with no left side, over my stay in the hospital they did many tests, that I found out you have just grit you teeth to get through. then /i was moved to the rehab hospital, they did let my husband drive me over. the worst thing was not being able to get up for the bathroom, until I had help. I go a lot. plus I'm always thirsty, the diabetes I think, then I found out I was in the brain damage ward, and I was determined that I would pull myself out of it. over the next two months I had pt and ot and st every day I had to learn to bath and dress myself, I had early spasm in my leg that made it stiff, so was able to try walking fairly quickly, however i was still a high risk for falls, that wouldn't change for about 5 months, I was determined to go back to work. finally a day was set for my release. and I t truly felt like a release from prison, the day before my release i was set up for a nuero psych exam. i learned as we were walking out the door that I wouldn't be able to go back to work. I had damage to my cognitive skills, can't multitask, can't do math, no concentration, easily confused. now I know why they taught me how to tell time and count money and write checks. and follow a recipe, and order in a restaurant. but I was free and scared to death. in a wheel chair, (because of fall risk, )my husband had to come and learn how to put me in and out of the car, and supervise my bath. finally home, I wanted a sit in bath tub bath, the hospital said no but I talked my husband into letting me. it was hard getting out but I made it with his help. I practised getting up from the floor first. And I found out I really couldn't work. I talked neuro into releasing me, I couldn't hack it physically or mentally. then I got pneumonia,while I was sick found out husband was going to have to leave, and he wouldn't leave me alone. so he packed me up in travel trailer and drove me to texas ( we lived in Indiana at the time. I didn't want to leave up there i felt like I was walking out on my nest. I couldn't take very much trailer too, he visited a couple of times when company sent him down here. then he was fired. I was already fired. so there went my insurance, then since I left my doctors up there the disability paperwork was no longer done and I lost my income. I had to file with social security, and surprisingly I was granted ssdi, I don't have to go for review for 3 years. I will now get to my purpose in telling all of this. Today I can dress myself proficiently, shower and do personal hygiene, handle my money. and yes even drive. I shop and get my own groceries, even getting them inside and put up. I do my own dishes, I do laundry some or take to the bundle service, I cook for myself, when I make a mess ( frequently) I clean it up, and do all my own housework. I manage independently, even with the handicaps I have. :cheer: I have made many new friendships both here and at my church. my diabetes is under control, and my blood pressure is also good, my cholesterol is down, LOOK HOW FAR I'VE COME. :Clap-Hands: