The kids had "The Wickerman" in the DVD player last night. In the beginning of the movie, Nicholas Cage tries to break into a car to get people out of it by slamming through a windshield with his police helmet. He goes at it full force a fes times and finally it shatters... And my mind goes straight to the windshield Joey's head went through...

Sometimes I'll be thinking nothing and that windshield will show up as a visual in my head.

I went out to the scene of the accident the morning it happened because Joey's friend called me. It was about 4am when I got the call. I answered the phone and James said, "Lorri, we were in a really bad accident. I'm covered in blood and all of it's Joey's." So I rushed out there. Joey had already been transported by helicopter and James had just left in the ambulance. But the car was there and I couldn't take my eyes off the windshield. It was shattered and coned out where his head went through and blood everywhere. Blood in all the little cracks that shattered windshields have, dripping down the window, pooled where the windshield meets the hood...

I talked to the police and paramedics, calmly answered their questions, couldn't take my eyes of the windshield of that car. I couldn't look at their faces because they looked so traumatized themselves. I didn't think Joey would live to get to the hospital.

He did live and he's doing well. He doesn't really remember the accident, thank God.

But I do and I never know when it will hit me. When I see his scars, I imagine the glass ripping his face nearly off, severing his neck to the base of his skull. When I see EMR teams at accidents my heart beats fast and I get short of breath. I've had dreams of him going out the windshield and coming bback through. I woke up screaming one night, I woke up the whole house screaming. It's like PTSD but it wasn't my trauma. And I don't want to think about it the thoughts just come. Like last night.

It'll get better with time. Everything does.