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one step forward three steps backward


Tascha

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well here it is past midnight and i had so many thoughts whirling around in my brain i couldn't sleep. i finally called the psychiatrist and made an appointment to see him and start the drugs again. naturally as soon as i take a step, the depression receeds. kind of makes me wonder if i should bother. but i think i've learned my lesson this time. i cannot fight it back on my own. it is not situational, it is chemical. i am not weak, i am strong because i survived a stroke and continue to advocate for myself. and i must say, i raised fine children. i've had good chats with all of them this week. they ahve good heads on their shoulders. 10 more weeks before rachel's baby is due. my first grandchild!! wonder who she is and will be? boy this entry is all over the place isn't it.

anyone have any good suggestions for a baby shower? that is what is keeping me awake again.

si in ara (sp)

 

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hi Tascha,

so glad you called the doctor. you are right, depression is a chemical imbalance and needs to be treated like other medical issue. my doctor once compared it to my daughter's diabetes.....her body does not produce the insulin she needs so she must take insulin. the same with depression....our brains don't produce the chemicals we need so we take the proper medication.

congratulations on the soon to be grandchild. as far as a shower, i always say keep it simple....no games please. just good friends and yummy food. hope the new year is good to you and your family. keep us posted on the baby news. cheers! kathy

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thank you kathy. when did you have your stroek? i guess i am still adjusting to this new way of living. it's been almost 5 years for me. i have had a few months of pychotherapy along with ad meds. but i struck out on my own thinking i could handle it. now i'm not so sure. i have to accept the possibility that there is permanent brain damage causing depression and chemical imbalances. oh well, it could be worse. i could be dead or unable to move or speak. thanks again for the word of encouragement. happy new year!

cathy jenkins

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hi cathy:

 

I never thought of depression like Kathy said but it does makes sense. & as each stroke differs, each deficits are different. with that said I think by taking medicines for depression does not make you less strong person infact it makes you wise person that you realized it & taking actions to overcome it. congrats on your first grand child. I hear grandchildren are more joy. wishing you Happy, Healthy & Prosperous New Year

 

Asha

 

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