I am sorry for your loss. "Family" is a strange animal and sometimes it is hard to deal with them. I am sorry they have hurt you, no one deserves that. Shame on them for doing it when you needed them the most. My thoughts are with you.

Sharon

Doug I am sending you my condolences because someone precious has left your life. Not the person you think of your mother being now, who has maybe dropped out of your affections for what others have done to you, but for the mother who loved you as a baby, a toddler etc.

 

If you don't go to the funeral you will find it hard to have closure, I know that sounds like phsyco babble but I did do chaplaincy so I do know how rites and rituals free you up to move on in life. Maybe just sit down at the time the funeral is happening and do your own meditation and remember the good times you shared.

 

You probably won't publish this reply but I wanted to tell you I am praying for you, and hope you will be freed up from whatever is keeping you from feeling the emotions we all feel at the loss of a parent.

 

(((Hugs))) from Sue.

Actually, I do not have a choice. The only way I can be accepted by my family is if I accept my brother. I have been advised by all my counselors, and my own judgement, that will never happen.