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But Im the Mom right?


ksmith

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today I find myself between a rock and a hard place. My eldest son lives in Florida with his dad who in the long run agreed to keep my son ( after 16 years but I digress lol) So he called me up asking me if I could help him financially for spring break. I have the money and he is my son. Of course I would help. Here is where the problem is... My husband. His step-father. He feels like since he is now living in Florida with his father, let him handle it. But HE IS MY SON I understand that my husband feel like he gone so be it and he is 17. get a job. This is coming from a man whose been laid off for over 10 months. Jobs are scares. There isn't much a 17 boy can get that 1000's of ther boys aren't already trying for. I'm at a cross roads. I said to him " If you ask your parents for help, they'd do it?" as to which he said 'I wouldn't ask them for money' you're mossing the point dude,, they are your parents and they would help you. Right?head_hurts.gif

 

 

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We live in FLorida. I have a 17-year-old-son at home, the last of 3 kids. I can tell you that finding a job at that age does not happen here. Businesses don't want employees younger than 18, and now they can't even get their own health insurance until they are 19.

 

My oldest son lives with his father, but still comes to me for financial help some times, at age 21. I give it to him, every time I am able. Sam (his step-father) fusses sometimes. I tell him that I made my son. He is my blood and I will always help him out in whatever way my son needs, as long as I am at able to do so. When we conceived our kids, they didn't ask us to be born. That was our choice, so taking care of them doesn't end because they hit a certain age, or moved to a different place. They are still ours.

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hey Kelly:

 

I agree with Lydia, you should be able to help your son for his spring break, just because they reached certain age does not mean our duties as parents are over.hopefully you will be able to convince your husband to do right thing. what he would have done, had it be his own son.

 

 

 

Asha

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You are right, you are the mom and if and when your husband is with you, he has your children in his concerns too.

 

I have been there, done that and today I'm in my fourth marriage. All of them has been with kids. I married the mom, I got her kids too. So there should not be any wavering when the two of you must make decisions concerning your kids or his kids from a previous marriage.

 

Do what you must and feel good about it, it's your child! :big_grin: :cocktail:

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Kelly: I helped raised a niece, who's Mom was drug addicted. My brother and his wife and Bruce and I raised her. She had all the help she needed to cope and the best of schooling, because it was not her fault and her disabilities were caused by her birth mother. We all paid for private schooling, cars, college, special camps. But we did not pay for parties or holidays.

 

I have done Spring Break, as I am sure you did. Give hive $200.00 towards gas, or car insurance. Pay for health insurance, special courses, advanced studies, books, special interests. But a vacation, in these hard times, no. Sorry, I just do not see it. Britt spent her holidays volunteering or in camp for her special needs. Vacation is a perk, only earned with hard work and advancement. Spring Break is not a requirement. Work towards your Community Service, add to your college resume, volunteer and get that on your resume. Life is not about Spring Break. He is 17, going into his most important year in high school and that high school diploma will get him no where.

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Lydia... this is really spookysleazy.gif

 

Thanks guys for all your responses. I'm glas we're all going/gpne through this

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