Stroke Survivor - female
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About Pearls

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    Associate Mentor
  • Birthday 11/11/1950

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  • Stroke Anniversary (first stroke)
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  1. Pearls

    Seems to me you are trying to reason with someone who cannot reason. Always a lost cause. You are reacting to Dan as if he were able to control who he is. Might I suggest that he is unable to control his personality and decisions. Stroke can affect any part of the brain including emotions, personality, decision making, incontinence. This is what brain damage looks like. Don't take it personally. It doesn't have to make sense. You are blaming him which is causing you more anger, frustration, and resentment. At some point you need to let go. No matter how much you love him love is not going
  2. Pearls

    I understand your frustrations. I hear patients go on and on about how wonderfully they were treated by hospital staff and then I wonder if something is wrong with me because I have had a few terrible experiences at the hands of staff and cannot always say the same thing as others. Most of my encounters have been good but not all. To expect a patient to be in charge of what a driver does or doesn't do is bizarre. Staff knows better than that. Administrative staff (not nursing) should have taken control and remedied the problem and not quibbled with a drug induced patient. You were their respo
  3. STROKE AWARENESS MONTH -- I have just joined a small local Stroke Support Group at the hospital We have been discussing what we as a small group can do to reach out and increase awareness.  Any suggestions??


  4. BLOGS -- Still trying to find my way around the newly designed Strokenet. Is there a comprehensive tutorial? My dh and son are planting trees for me to view out of my forever window. A Golden Maple, an Autumn Blaze Maple and an Austrian Pine tree. Such lovely new colors to feast my eyes on and hopefully they will attract more birds and maybe some new species for me to identify and observe.  I love birdwatching.

  5. Benefits of Stroke --OMG I used to be spitting mad whenever someone used this phrase. It hit a nerve like no other. It's been three years since my stroke and I've learned a few things about myself.  Several months ago I went ziplining. I have trouble walking across a room. If I go somewhere that requires more than going across a room I need a wheelchair.  I was in a rut. I needed a challenge. I have always been afraid of heights and speed. I do not go on carnival rides. Well the bigger the rut, the bigger the challenge. Walking thru the forest to the jump off tree was the most difficult part. Getting hoisted up into the tree on a pulley I had a quiet panic attack. By the time I got up to the jump off platform I had trouble breathing but I kept moving forward. Flying thru the tree tops at 35 MPH turned out to be fun. In fact, I did it three times. It has turned out to be the biggest confidence booster I could have chosen.  If I had not had a stroke and become paralyzed I would not in a million years have chosen to go ziplining in my old life. In my old life I was living in my comfort zone. I was not pushing myself to do extraordinary things. The next thing I learned was that I was living in a confined space in my old life. I have always been a creative person and that is truly where my passion lived. Being able to use only one hand and not very well at that I struggled to find creative outlets for myself. Most creative endeavors require the use of hands. The right side of my brain was damaged during my stroke and they say that is your creative side. Whether or not that is true doesn't really matter. I no longer had the dexterity I once had and it seemed that other parts of the creativity were starting to fade. What an incredible loss of identity to follow after loss of body, loss of job and loss of dreams. Somehow I got elected to be head of my HOA. Probably because no one else wanted to do it. I really didn't want to do it but I'm the kind of person that will step up and do things if no one else will. The HOA became involved in some legal issues and the next thing I knew I was doing legal research............and I enjoyed it. I enjoyed it with a new found passion! Now I am studying to take the LSAT ( the entrance exam for Law School). I don't know if I'll ever go to law school. I'm 66 but who knows. I am loving every minute of studying except I am having trouble holding the pages open in the book and I have to print instead of writing in script. AGAIN I would not have discovered this part of myself if it weren't for my stroke. Am I glad I had a stroke? He** No.   I've become an avid problem solver. I am continually thinking about how to do things differently to make them work. If I can't butter a slice of bread, how can I approach it differently? But it is spilling over into every part of my life, even my relationships. Is that my creative side or is that my analytical side? Some days my mind is full and other days the fatigue hits me. I have to plan ahead for the fatigue and it is a real downer but I am better at adjusting than I used to be. Three years ago the fatigue was always there. Soooo much I have learned about myself, about others, about the brain, about life. This is certainly a different life than I would have chosen but ha-ha, there are some benefits, some new discoveries.

    1. Pearls


      One more Benefit I forgot to mention. Prior to my stroke I had a problem with Vertigo. Severe problem, was at the ER three times. Since my stroke the problem has disappeared. Gone.


  6. Pearls

    If you make too much, I looooove peanut brittle. I would even buy some from you. Name your price and I am in. I can almost taste it now.
  7. Pearls

    Okay Stop and ask yourself "Is this working or not working?". Sounds like it is not working therefore time to change strategy. What can you do differently? Are you using earbuds just to block out roomie or are you listening to music? During the day do you stay in room or do you take a walk and change scenes? Do you journal? What frustrates you the most? Tackle one problem at a time. What soothes you? Do you read? Do you reach out to others and see what you can do to help comfort them? How much are you socializing? I am concerned about your stress levels. What is your reward system? What d
  8. Happy Birthday Pearls!

  9. Pearls

    Another fall. These are like milestones in my life but in a regressive way. Went to book club at a friends house whose husband just died. It was raining. I made it up the concrete steps to the porch just fine. And then when I was on a flat surface i met the concrete. Skinned up and bruised but nothing broken. Luckily I had six people to help me get up or I'd still be laying there.
  10. Pearls

    Good question. I don't know but I would guess for a looooong time. Your mom had 18 children??!!!! OMGOSH! What a woman!! You must have been the lucky one. (Sarcasm). Like you I am paralyzed on my left side but I can not walk up inclines or handicapped ramps. I can do stairs, lots of stairs, if there is a railing to hold onto. Something about a ramp just throws me totally off. I avoid ramps because they are just too difficult for me. I am impressed that you are able to get the scooter in and out of the car by yourself. Is it one that comes apart in two or three pieces? I just had a big dra
  11. Pearls

    Praying for your grandson, his mother, and family. What is his name?
  12. Pearls

    Hope you didn't hurt yourself. It seems everytime I think I am doing Really well I fall. When I am not doing well I am very careful. I forget sometimes that I have to be careful all the time.
  13. Pearls

    Exploring the Possibilities

    Leave no stone unturned. There was a time when I was younger and without a physical disability. I always tried new things. Somewhere along the way I started to accept the status quo but if you don't try new things, you stay in the same old place. As long as you are alive you can move forward. You will not always succeed but failure is just another stepping stone to success. It is a learning experience. I have always been a perfectionist. If I couldn't give something my all out best and do it well then I didn't want to do it at all. i had very high standards. I have learned that just trying so
  14. Pearls

    However (read previous entry) it just wasn't working for me. I couldn't sit up straight and my body kept leaning back. Whenever I lay flat on my back with my head hanging lower i get very nauseous. We adjusted and readjusted all the straps many times. By this time i was not only sick to my stomach but was short of breath. We eventually got it worked out with much trial and error and I was pulled up to the tree platform. Once I got up to the platform I had to worry about my balance. I was tethered on in three places and had three strong men holding onto me who were also tethered. There was n
  15. Pearls

    MISSION ACCOMPLISHED. NEVER GIVE UP BECAUSE YOU CAN DO IT. I did the zipline three times. I want to start out by saying I would never do just any zipline. Each is different. SKAMANIA LODGE ZIPLINE TOUR which is the one I used in Stevenson, Washington really pays attention to safety at all levels. They are very professional. They went above and beyond to accomodate my disability and adjust whatever extra safety problems I might encounter. They already had previous disabled customers prior to me, two paraplegics and a quadraplegic and had worked out most of the bugs before I got there. Since I