EvRi1

I used to ask myself, "Why am I even alive?" on a regular basis. Then, one day I remembered an inspiring animated story that I had seen years earlier about a young child named Oblio. The villagers didn't approve of Oblio because everyone else had a pointed, cone shaped head. Oblio was the only person in the village that didn't. His head was round. So, the villagers banned Oblio to the pointless forest. Time went by. Then one day Oblio returned to the village. He was asked, "Have you learned anything?" Oblio replied, "I've learned that we don't have to have a point, to have a point". Sure enough, when he took his hat off there it was. He had a point! Translation, "We don't have to have a point to have a reason. However we all need to have a reason. If not, what's the point??" We all need a reason. If not, what's the use? It's not enough to sit around moping all day complaining about what we've lost and thinking about what might have been. Instead, thank God for what you have left, and for being here now! It could have been worse, or you wouldn't be reading this. You already have something most people never get, a second chance. Use it wisely!!! Think about things that interest you or something that you've always cared about. Now's the time to get involved. It doesn't matter how small or insignificant it may seem. Start small and grow. No excuses. Just do it!!! God gave us little horseshoe nail crosses as our reason. Others may view them simply as crosses that we sell to make a buck. However they are much more than that to us! We view them as mental and motor-skill therapy and our reason! Maybe you can too! It all began awhile after my NDE when a preacher asked me to speak in front of the church. I said that I couldn't do that because I had nothing to say. The preacher told me to just tell my story. He believed that is why I was given a second chance and to tell my story to everyone that would listen. I declined to speak, but that's when I started to try. Believing, "Build it and they will come", our first page was the one about my stroke. It took us 4-6 months to get the first visitor to our website. Now we get hundreds daily - (We've never hit 1000 but have came very close several times) We began receiving Inspirational Emails from the visitors. As acknowledgement, we began including them on the website. We began to receive so many that we had to create a library to put them in. There were so many links that the library took way to long to download; so we divided the page into two etc. Now it has snowballed into well over two hundred articles in four Inspirational Email Libraries and we are backlogged with many more that someday hope to catch up and include. (Not bad for someone with a severe brain impairment, had no talents and knew virtually nothing about the Internet or websites.) We planted a seed five years ago, and watch it grow. It's not about the money; riches don't always come as wealth! My NDE is the true reason for our website. The crosses are only there to fund it. We are on a fixed and limited income and use the cross and ebook sales money to pay the associated hosting expenses. Sometimes I am actually happy that I got hurt. Because if I hadn't I would have never slowed down, found the time to serve Him, make so many friends and affect so many lives. I just wish that I'd learned it sooner but never took the time. Now if there's one thing I have, it's time. It's how I use it that matters. Throughout history, Christians have suffered and have asked themselves the same questions that we do today. I believe that we'll get our reward when the time comes. Until then, we must be strong. It's not a popularity contest! Before ending I feel obligated to tell you that my wife Evelyn reads almost every one of the emails that I receive and I hers. That is why we often go by the name EvRi1. (Evelyn + Rick) We have been married for over 39 years. I have a lot of trouble conveying my thoughts, word association, typing with one left finger (was right handed) etc. so we talk, then she writes. As long as we have something to keep us busy we don't have the time to think about ourselves. I was a very mean and bitter person. I took it out on everyone, until I went to the psyche. (see story) I've learned that it helps to view problems as "opportunities in disguise" , attitude truly is everything and... Never give up!!!

I'm judging from the comments that I receive to decide if I should "blog" again or not. I joined this stroke group back in June 2007 and tried this all then, but gave up shortly thereafter after because I am not very good at communicating, I type with one finger and get frustrated when I can't find the words to say what I mean. I have been reading everyone else's comments on a somewhat regular basis but am leery of leaving comments of my own. Everything seems to come out wrong; I am a very happy person and want to share, but have trouble conveying that. I am also a very realistic person and sometimes hurt others at times without meaning to. I apologize, but by then it is too late. If I should ever offend you, please believe me when I say, "It is not intentional". Thank you for your input! Rick P. S. I also tend to ramble

I don't know anything about a blog, but want to write in hopes that others may learn from my experience! I've read that a blog is a day-to-day diary. That is not at all what I have in mind. I hope that what I'm doing is okay! I will continue posting occasionally until I am told to quit, get a lot of negative feedback, run out of things to say or am no longer able to say them. I don't want to offend anyone!!! I tore my vertebral artery in 1994 and had a TIA. I never even knew it until on Easter Sunday; my brain became starved from oxygen. It was called a very severe base-of-the-brain stroke for lack of a better term. They never removed the blockage and I was told it doesn't matter. Dead is dead and the risk is too great that it may kill me. After recovering, the first words out of my mouth were, "Let me die" but no one could understand me anyway. Being at a relatively young age of 44 and being very healthy, I became very bitter, taking it out on others. Sometime around June 2008 I was told by my eye doctor that I am going blind in my left eye due to lack of blood flow, but restoring the flow can kill me. I was told that my eye will turn white. (I guess I'll wear a patch) In October 2008, I had a severe heart attack with 99.5% blockage and received three stints. (Since then there have been several times when I have gotten dizzy). Then a month later on Thanksgiving Day 2008 I just went down. I woke up with paramedics getting ready to take me away. I demanded that they leave me alone. However they insisted that I get up off the floor, make it to bed on my own and sign a waiver before they would leave. Iin January 2009 while at the dentist, I was told a medical term that indicates I have something in my arteries on the same side as my injury. Then later in the spring of 2009, I broke my nose and almost bled to death when my heart stopped causing me to pass out and fall. As they say, "I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired". I'm writing this now and taking each day as it comes because my future doesn't look very bright; instead of sunglasses I need a flashlight. I recently took a real age test and although my chronological age is 58, my real age was 72 and that was before my heart attack. I have to assume that my days are numbered. By now you may be thinking, "Why is he doing this? Is he intentionally tying to depress me."? That isn't why at all. It's been 15 years since my stroke during which time I have gone through many changes. I am beginning to feel like an expert on the topic! I've come a long way during which time I wasted many years in denial, depression and self-pity. I have never physically recovered, and now realize that I never will. I have learned to accept it. I have gone from rock bottom to the happiest years of my life. I always wanted to get well physically. What I never realized is that attitude is the key. One of the first rules of psychology is, "Just because you know me today, it doesn't mean that you'll know me tomorrow". We are ever evolving creatures based on our personal life experiences. The Philosopher Earl Nightingale called it The Strangest Secret..."We become what we think about." And the great Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote, "A man is what he thinks about all day long." It's so true, negative thinking produces negative results while all good things can and will come to him who thinks optimistically. Perhaps the most profound statement of all regarding the power of "Definitely Directed Thought" comes from the tongue of Jesus Himself, "All things are possible to him who believes" (Mark 9:23). We need to accept the fact that we have experienced a major change, and there's nothing that we can do to change that. The sooner we accept it the better! Over time, I've learned to have a sense of humor, take every day one at a time, get right with my family and God, and to live every day as though it may be my last is about all that anyone can do. Awhile back I was regressing into depression, antidepressants and alcohol. I was feeling sorry for myself and complained to Steve Mallory in an email. He wrote back, "How can you even say that? Look at