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missing my father in law and friend


oldman57

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As I have shared with most of you so far I am caregiver to both kitty 10 year stroke survivor and my father in law who only has 10% lung function due to black lung. He was in the hospital or a nursing home since just before Christmas 2010 and finally returned home a few weeks ago.

 

Today for what seems like the millionth time I was up to his house fixing a drainage problem under his house. What was different this time compared to all the times I have done the same job in the past, he wasn't able to be around where I was working doing his usual supervising job.

 

Every few days my mother in law asks me to come sit with him while she runs to town to take care of some errans, which I gladly do. Today while working on his drain it really hit home that he is not the man that had been there prior to going into the hospital. I don't know cause no one has ever said anything but I sometimes wonder if the oxygen deprivation he has suffered has caused him to change or if what he had a stroke while in the hospital all that time.

 

I know and believe after reading some of you all's blogs and form post that the man I knew is still there. I anxiously await the day for him to return. I love the man as much as if he were blood kin.

 

Thanks for letting me ramble for a few just had to share what I relized today.

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Mike, I am sorry for your sadness. With your situation and the fact that both families live so close, I would imagine for most of the last ten years, he was probably your best friend! The two of you dealt with the family issues, probably spelled each other off on chores and errands. And enjoyed many an outing together.

 

Love him Mike, lots of smiles, tell jokes, hold his hand. He knows you are there even if he can't tell you. Rejoice in the time you have left with him. Tell him of your follies tending to chores and how much you miss his "expertise". Ask for his input on your projects.

 

I had to put weather=stripping under the ACs-slight gap. I played this up to Bruce like I was the dumbest blond he ever knew. We laughed, he gave his input. Its those moments that relieve the sadness for a while and give you something to smile about at the end of the day.

 

Thoughts and prayers, Debbie

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Mike,

You are such a sweet heart. Helping out all the time. You spotted a stroke survivor. Hopefully with time your father-in-law will come back all the way. But , you have to be very patient as you know.

 

take care of yourself.

Ruth

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I don't know much about Black Lung disease except how you get it but lawyers here run ads on TV offering to take those cases. I hope you have settled the case for him. In fact lawyers here in my city and nearby cities offer help for everything you need or suffer from to get paid. So, I guess they settle the case, they are on TV all day and night. Otherwise they probably wouldn't keep advertising on TV.

 

That's how I got help with my VA case. All the best to you in caring and being a care giver for Kitty and father in law! :Clap-Hands: :big_grin:

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