I've just read some blogs from April 2006, six years ago, I have been blogging since August 2005 here so if you want to read back it will take you a while. Six years ago Ray had slight signs of dementia, was finally doing his leg exercises and we were doing quite well. We were looking forward to a new grandchild (Alex born in June 2006) and Ray was off to Camp Breakaway for three days to give me a break and the opportunity to have some "Sue time".

As usual at the end of the blogs were the kind and thoughtful comments. That has always been the big bonus of blogging on here, the thoughtful way in which people read and reflect on what is written, it is better than therapy. Thank you all so much to everyone who has supported me in this way over the years.

Today when I found Ray at the Nursing Home he was sitting in the loungeroom in his wheelchair almost toppling over with his head lolled outwards on the right side and his right hand touching the floor. When I moved his arm he yelped with pain. Not good. I finally got him fully awake and upright but it was time for lunch by then so I didn't go to see a staff member to see if anything had happened, like a TIA. he certainly seemed vague and spaced out.

He seemed almost unable to raise the spoon to his mouth today so I borrowed a second spoon and helped him scoop up food and negotiate it to his mouth. In the end I leaned against him to keep him upright which allowed him to move his right hand and shoulder more freely. I did go and see one of the staff after lunch but unfortunatley the only nurse on was attending another resident who had had a fall so I didn't get to speak to her myself.

In the end I decided that Ray would be better off in bed and I asked one of the aides to put him in bed for me. I think maybe life now he is out of quarantine ( the NH opened on Friday) is probably busier than the preceeding two weeks and maybe he is more tired and making an adjustment to that. Or maybe he has had another TIA. Either way bed rest will do him no harm and may improve the situation. And although the day started out with watery sunshine the wind came up, heavier rain fell and honestly a day in bed may be a good use of time. I'm tempted to take it up myself.

My son Trevor was out of work for a week. His job that was supposed to last three months had lasted for eight but it was still a blow when the boss said he was putting him off due to lack of contracts. He didn't have a week's holiday but he started to look for work and on Friday had a second interview for a job which he will start on Monday. With the expected birth of his baby due the first week in June he needs good steady employment so I hope this job will provide just that. Edie is off work awaiting the birth so she is only on basic pay as part of her maternity leave so they will really depend on Trev's wages.

Mum is well, I saw her several times last week and she did have some periods of being awake and alert which was good. I have filled in some of the paperwork needed to go into her Nursing home with Home Communions and should be able to set up appointemnts next week. The NH has to have a clearance from the Federal Police so they know I am not an axe murderer or a threat to their seniors... another instance where too much paperwork discourages people with the time to do so from being volunteers. I also got paperwork from Ray's Nursing Home and theirs is a large multiple page booklet much like an employment form so I will take a while to fill that in.

I was a server at church this morning. I got a good report from my observer other than for being in the wrong place. We had two clergy this morning instead of one so I was trying to keep out of everyone's way. She said I did well apart from that so will soon get rid of my "Learner's" tag...lol. It is good sometimes to take on something that stretches my mind a bit as I need to get back to something like my life used to be. I might even go back to study if I can work out how that will work in with my present responsibilities. I don't want to do anything that will mean giving less time and attention to Ray.

I went out with the WAGS (stroke support) group yesterday and was conscious of being on my own as the other caregivers fussed over their survivor. The others were happy to see me and asked after Ray but I felt strange being there without him. It is all a learning curve and as usual I will battle my way to acceptance as I have done so many times before.