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New to site, new to stroke experience, new to everything



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I am totally new to this site. My husband had a stroke on July 30. He didn't show any of the classic signs but had fallen at home. We found out in the ER. He had another stroke while in the hospital. He hasn't suffered any paralysis but has vision problems and is extremely tired all the time. He also seems to be experiencing some short term memory loss. He came home Monday of this week. Just getting up in the morning, shaving and taking a shower totally wears him out. Has this been your experience? I just don't really know what to expect and what is normal in the recovery process. Hospital personnel kept telling us how lucky he was and I realize that, it could have been so much worse but this is all new to us and any help and encouragement we can get is greatly appreciated. I guess at this point I don't even know what questions to ask. I feel helpless.



My husband had 2 strokes in 1997, the thing to remember, each patient is different. There is no normal recovery. I was told my husband would never walk again, but he does! You have to take each day as it comes and celebrate the little victories. Be patient, ask the questions. Yes, my husband still becomes very tired, we plan our activities based on how he feels each day and each day is different. Are you in rehab, or PT? My husband has short term memory loss as well, but at least he does't stay made at me for long! This can be a very scary time for you both get support and talk about it. I'll be happy to answer any.


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Could you say the age of your husband? Did they send your husband home then? Is he getting therapy? Is he still trying to work? Please share what kind of vision problems he is having. Several of us caregivers have our guys with different types of vision problems. Bob's vision stop at his nose - it is total blank. The best way to see how that looks is to close one eye, then with it STILL CLOSED, put your hand between your eyes, with the edge on your nose.


He is affected on his right side, has aphasia, and some cognitive problems. He has no bathroom control. He sleeps more than he is awake, about 8 hours a day awake.

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Welcome Maddienme,


You just got to read around the board to really get an idea how and where to look for what you want to know more about or you can log in and ask your question in one of the many Forums and be sure to get many answers to your questions. You can really learn a lot about strokes survivors and recovery.


Also what to do for your husband in every situation for his recovery process. There is so much here to know!!

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glad to have you----- there is always something to learn -- from each other... please post on the forums and blog and answer our blogs.. we all feel a lot less alone when we are in this together...

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hi Maddie:


welcome to best online stroke support group & our small blog world, where you will notice by being active here you will find lot of friends & feel less alone in your post stroke journey. Stroke affects whole family. Every one in the family has to step out of their comfort zone & charter in unknown territory of life, but we all are living proof to let you know it does become better, yes first few years after stroke is difficult for every one, but that time just keep your head above water & have faith that these things will pass too, nothing lasts forever good times or bad times. hope to see you around more often here.


Asha (42 year old survivor)

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Welcome to Strokenet! I'm sure you'll find this site to be valuable. All the best to you and your husband, Veta

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Welcome to our Blog Community. I made the font size bigger as some of our survivors would have trouble reading the smaller print. Good to have you on board.

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My husband is 75 and came home last Monday am. He was in the hospital 6 days. His vision loss in the right eye starts about 1:00 and is lost from there on. He said there are like little light blocks floating around right at 1:00. They said he did not need any therapy so nothing there. He was evaluated before the 2nd stroke tho. He can walk fine but the least amount tires him out. He will not be able to work (part time job) or drive for some time. He also is a golfer.

Have a question. The little 'quote' box whenever someone comments, what is that for. do I answer individually there? I'm sure I'll catch on pretty soon. Thank you all for your comments, it's good to know you are there

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I don't use the quote box myself, it quotes the entire message you are responding to. If it is too much of the message, I'm thinking you could probably erase all but the part you are answering to. Maybe I'll try it after this note, to see if I can just erase down to this question about the quote box. I usually just start off with the person's name that I am answering, if it is not the original poster, and maybe respond to more than one person in one post.


Strokes do just exhaust people so. Bob goes thru PT ok, but Speech is actually more exhausting for him. I guess it's because he is actually using the organ that is mis-firing. When I look at him after speech, he looks like some one who has been up studying for exams for 3 nights. His friends had trouble understanding that they could not just drop over, and so if he was napping, tell him to get up. They didn't get that when he gets exhausted his ability to think, or say anything at all, just goes down to him ready to fall right on his face. Sleeping is good for strokes, kinda like not using your arm when it is sprained - so you don't use your brain when you are asleep.


Some people get some or all vision back, after 1.5 years, it does not seem Bob will. And since he has some cognitive issues, no matter how many times I say it, he can not think to scan both sides, even when I'm SAYING it!


Watch his stroke side/leg/foot/arm/hand as those are things that can begin to tighten up with tone LATER. If you see any of that, ask his doctor for baclofen, if he is not already on it.

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Have a question. The little 'quote' box whenever someone comments, what is that for. do I answer individually there? I'm sure I'll catch on pretty soon.


-There, I put this little hyphen when I started writing, to indicate it was in reply to the above. I hit the quote box, then just left the question I was answering, erasing the rest. Yes, you can answer someone individually like that. It can become a head ache if someone quotes everyone's post, in total. Or maybe it's just me, ha, ha.

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Hi Sandy, we also have somewhat of a problem with people staying too long when they visit. But, I have to admit I wouldn't have known until now just how little stamina a stroke victim has. He is sleeping a lot and I know that is the body healing itself. sleep seems to be the answer no matter what type of illness we have. People also are expecting more of him than he has to give since he's not showing signs of paralysis anywhere. There seems to be some activity in the right eye where his vision loss is. He's not seeing more but light flashes in that area. I am documenting everything so we can inform the Dr. when he goes next time. The memory issue stays the same so far but its not even two weeks yet.

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One of the gals here had her guy's vision pop on and off several times, then stayed on. But in the beginning stages, his vision made him very nauseous, they that that symptom comes from tiny eye movements, like spasms, that people are unaware of, but the brain picks up as like being on a ride at the amusement park!


One thing that might help others understand is to use the words "brain damage". This would be clearer to them that it may be something they cannot see, but it is there causing problems.


Your being observant and keeping notes is the way to go.


Just gave hubby his shower, which he hates, but he has gotten to the point that he doesn't cry and prayer thru it anymore! I wouldn't have understood that if I had not read a book a stroke person wrote that explained how it felt when the water hit him - the prickles like darts and the skin's over reaction to temperature. But tonight was actually our best shower ever, he even helped :)

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Rich has been having some nausea off and on and I didn't associate it with the vision problem. That could be it. He's having some pain in the back, knee, wrist. Wondering if its from being in bed so many hours and not getting enough exercise. I think he did way too much today. Was up and in the car and then went for a ride with a friend in the company truck so now he's so totally worn out. It seems to be trial and error on how much he can do in a day's time.


Sandy, it made my heart smile that your hubby had a good reaction to the shower. Getting educated on symptoms, etc makes caregiving easier. Did not know they go through so much.


I wish I had known earlier (years) about the hardships stroke victims suffer. Would have made me a better and more understanding friend to a good friend who suffered a stroke and is now gone.

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Oh, although our water pressure really is terrible here, this time I turned it even further down... maybe that was the key. Also, less water in the face for me, and less of a pond on the floor!


I had a friend who had a stroke.. maybe 20 years ago. Her husband had suddenly fell dead the year before, and her daughter lived states away. I was it. I went to therapy with her every morning, and when she was released from rehab, I drove her back there everyday. She cried when she heard about Bob and said she felt so bad, because I had helped her so much, and she couldn't do anything for me. But I explained to her, the if I had not had the experience with her, I'd have been completely lost and alone in this. Well, the alone part is still true!


I downloaded the free kindle ap for the computer on amazon.com and this is the book that really helped me to understand the things that a stroke person might feel, and to watch out for as they might do it - the kindle option is under the pic to the left. Oh, and Bob is TRYING to read it a little at a time:



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