Sometimes I pray for a miracle and what I get is something like one of those old black and white comedy movies with strange characters doing strange things. For the last two days a local "scrappie" (metal collector) and his mate has been helping me clean up under the house and cabin and fill a 3 cubic metre skip (bin) which is parked outside my house. Drop off was this Wednesday, pick-up next Wednesday.

When the bin came I was appalled at what I had done. There sat the bin, huge empty and rusty, I had to fill it up but how? I knew when it was collected it would only contain what I had been able to put in myself. And under the house and cabin was heaven only knows what, valuable, valueless, wood, iron, steel, aluminium and plastic, all of Ray's "bits that will come in useful one day" collection. Plus old doors, windows, screen doors etc, a huge pile of junk on three different parts of the block. It gave me goosebumps to just contemplate the job ahead. So where to start? Anywhere would do I guess.

Along came a metal collector. He saw the collection of old aluminium frames I had laid by the bin and asked if I had any more. This was a one woman operation on Wednesday so I said I was transferring it all from up the back. He asked to come up and see and collected some more metal stripping that Ray had for who knows what reason, saw the weights and asked if he could have those for his son, saw an old motor from a washing machine, could he have that too. Gladly I said, as long as it all goes out of the yard.

This time last week I had high expectations of the cabin roof being fixed at last. The roofer Mark was to have the materials here on Wednesday and by Friday it would all be done! Alas from Monday this week we have had rain every day.It has not rained all day every day but a couple of days it did rain all day and it was definitely cold as well as wet.

Thursday morning I did my first Scripture class at one of the local schools. I had lots of fun with the children, came home, had coffee and changed. Back to the piles of rubbish again. I was just wondering what to do next when in came a light truck, Another scrappie. He looked at the bin, looked at me and asked: "Mind if I help?' Wow, could have knocked me down with a feather. He was a largish man, said he had been a security guard, said he thought he had met one of my sons, vaguely remembered picking up stuff here once before. Well, he did know what was what, asked if he could have all the copper, brass and aluminium and anything that he thought was okay that I did not want. We worked side by side for three hours before the rain came down heavily and I decided enough.

Today he brought a mate who wanted some old decking I had under the back of the house and said he would help in exchange for taking it. So three of us, working for three hours put quite a dent in the piles. Even when we have filled up the bin there will be a lot left behind but I do have a couple more people coming. The local Men's shed people are making possum boxes for the local Wildlife Sanctuary out of plywood and I have lots of that so hopefully they will take some of that away for me. There is another friend who wants some too but he is away this week so can't shift it till next week.

It was strange working alongside two men I hardly know but they were kind, courteous and quite funny as they exchanged jokes and worked out what some of the strange objects were in Ray's old toolboxes. I am keeping tools, boxes of spanners, some of the old saws, shovels and other gardening tools. I am only keeping things I can use or what I still want for the boys and Shirley. Some of them were my Dad's moved here when Mum's house was sold. Of course I will have to have another down-size later, this is just the start.

It has been sad in a way seeing things Ray prized as they really are now, old, rusty, way past their useful life BUT some of it will be recycled by the young men and their families benefit from the extra pocket money Dad had earned on his days off. I do care about what is happening, I realise that if Ray had not had the strokes life would have been very different and a lot of what has been thrown out as useless would have been made into toys, boxes, sets of drawers, doll's houses for the girls etc as he had planned when he stored all of these materials. It was fate that intervened.

I can no longer live in the "if only" state, I have to be practical and cut my losses. One day I will want to move and that means all of this will have to be cleared out. So at least I have made a start now. And thanks to the suggestions of the girls in chat quite a few people found a bargain at the side of the road.