Respite Caregiver
It's been six months since I've posted. I now have my place in her life...giving her son and new daughter-in-law a break. I'm the only one who seems to be comfortable being with her by myself. Hey, if we go down, we go together. We'll just lay there till someone comes and helps us up!! (Note: Son says it cost $100 dollars if the EMTs come out to help her up. I say wake up the neighbors...or flag down a car. But really, I find it interesting that our volunteer fire company charges a fee...as if you get penalized for bothering them with trival stuff? But then again, maybe it's a service that has been abused in the past? Still irritates me.) As I've read with other blogs, the main issue of her recovery is her weight. This is a two edge sword as her independence is based on her weight and her only real joy in life right now is food. I'm still at arms length trying not to 'jump in with both feet'. There are three of us (Larry, Moe, and Curly) who do respite care for the couple. We all decided to go out to the movies to see 'star wars'. The three stooges didn't like the choice of movie, so we napped through half of it...droll rolling down our chins...but we made it through. It was the standing up and getting into the wheelchair afterwards where the fun began. We almost went down...with the manager of the movie theater standing right over us...*beep* me off that she just stood there...irritated that we were holding up the next showing of the movie as the army of 'cleaners' were standing outside the door watching us. I couldn't help saying to her 'can I help you??' She just ignored me and stood over us as we struggled not to go down. I'm just getting a feel for how the 'outside' world views disabilities. One of us has a husband who is a triple amputee from Vietnam War...so she was more in tune. Kids are helpful...they stepped up and held the doors for us as we came out with the wheelchair. We went to dinner at a local restaurant. Very accomodating. As we were getting out of our cars, a person in a wheel chair was hanging out near the car as the son was helping her out...asking if he needed help. It as funny how he was in the same boat and wanted to help. We chatted for about 15 minutes as he shared his issues. He has a GREAT van with the auto chair lift and the front seat that turned. That was awesome!! They say money can't buy happiness, but it sure as hell helps! We were lifting her in and out of a 4 cylinder low level car. Anyway, we had a great time...and the three stooges have now stepped up to helping out three or four times a week. Still not happy with her progress because I feel like she has 'given up' and I know she is capable of so much more. I'm sure this is common to think this way. Everyone is trying to be 'nice' and not kick butt...it's hard for all involved...especially her!
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