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Keeping a positive attitude




The Covid goes on. We still have restrictions but not as much as some countries do. We still have cases, in our State, New South Wales it is mostly under 20 new infections a day. It is a great result but it has come at a price. Many people are out of work, many can no longer afford luxuries like holidays so most stayed home this school holidays. Some older people are still feeling isolated as we are regularly told to keep safe, to keep away from crowded areas, not to gather in groups etc. I know our government has the ideal of the numbers falling to zero but I can't see that happening. All I can do is try to keep positive myself.


So it is get up, get dressed and get on with the day. Luckily with Spring here and in daylight saving time the days are warmer, longer and more enjoyable. I have been spending a lot of time in the garden potting up plants,flowers and vegetables. A friend collected a bunch of pots of various sizes from the roadside for me and so there is plenty to pot up into. As usual I am grateful to my friends for looking out for me. I am potting up some succulents to take into the Craft group. I took in some daisies that grow into a medium size bush and have bright yellow flowers and the people who took them planted out and say they are coming on well. Giving away plants makes me happy.


I am still crocheting the little cat mats. I give them to a friend to take to the RSPCA shelter. The mats are used for transition. The cat sits on the mat in its box when it enters the shelter. Then when someone adopts it the mat goes into the carrier with the cat. Then when it arrives at its forever home the mat is placed where the new owner wants the cat to sleep. Cat goes around the house sniffing unfamiliar smells and suddenly "wait a minute, what is that smell? My mat!" Home sweet home. Well that's the theory. When my friend takes them she says to me: "The pussies thank you."


I still make phone calls to older congregation members. Some are still not back at church. I guess that message: " Stay at home." is still echoing in their heads. Our church is following all the social distancing rules, has hand sanitizer available and extra masks if people come without them but the fear is still strong. I don't enjoy it as much without the singing and socialising we  had got used to as part of our Sundays but there is a chance we will be able to return to those actions in the future. Best to not give up hope and give in to fear.


I had Trevor and Alice visit for the first week of the Spring break as usual. It is a frantic week with trips out, crazy mornings at the beach, coffee and muffins at the shops and at home we enjoy playing Wii games. Every Granma knows the joy of letting an eight year old "beat" us at any number of different sports. I must say I would love half of Alice's energy. I need to practice more before the next holidays. I found boxing particularly hard, not done any of that for while. As Ray was a boxer in his youth I have to practice more to uphold the family honour.


As part of my pastoral care role I look out for congregation members when I am in the local shops. It adds to the time I am out but it is good to catch up with those who like me are widows and see it as part of their socialising. I can see different people on different days, and different times of the day. I know we are all busy people but shouldn't be too busy to share our time to help others feel connected. I learned from my time as a caregiver the importance of finding others to share with and that is particularly important in this time when we are cut off from family. I know a lot of the conversations finish with us both feeling happier. Because sometimes I feel lonely too.


How to stop those negative thoughts? Sometimes the answer for me is to keep busy, get outside, get enough exercise and eat healthy food. And sometimes none of that helps and I phone a friend. Often the friend is the first to say she is feeling a bit down lately and I say: "Me too." So we have a conversation, some sharing  of stories,  some laughter and lo! and behold we both feel better. On the bad days of course I ring four people and no-one is home so I come on here and read the posts, read the blogs, sometimes add a reply. And feel better! Joining in here feels good. I would encourage everyone to participate as much as they can. That is what makes this site so good, people who are supportive are willing to spend time sharing their thoughts. 


As a widow with a family scattered across half of Australia I find it sad sometimes that there is not more contact but I can initiate the phone call, send out emails, send a thought, a joke or a photo to them on Facebook. I am still the Mother. I can still pray for them. I can still love them in the times when they need love more than they need advice. They are going through the same feelings of deprivation I am as well as coping with work problems and family problems too. Hard sometimes when I feel sad and lonely and am  busy throwing a pity party for one. But I can recall how tough family life was for me sometimes and empathise with them on that level.


And so thanks kind friends on here, for reading this, for thinking kind thoughts, for commenting and showing me you understand. I am not quite sure we are "all in this together" as the advertisements and government agencies would have us think but we are all going through so many similar thoughts and feelings so hopefully will all come out of this into a brighter future.



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Sue I'm very much having a down day.

Whilst WA is great, there is still the shadow looming over us. Still social distancing etc.


You are right, keeping busy is what keeps me going, and happy.


You are definitely allowed pity parties. As long as they have a finishing time, and don't linger for too long.  There are no good days without the bad.


I need to take my own advice. 



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Janelle, life isn't what we planned for this year but for me the aim is to still be sane at the end of it and hopefully ready to start afresh next year. So many things I want to do while I am still well enough to do them.

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Hugs to you both, I've had a very down week and I need to stop looking at the news! I'm trying not to have a pity party for one here too. But we heard today that the  possible reduction of restrictions that was planned for the 19th is basically cancelled, although they are saying some easing of restrictions should still be possible. The dashing of hopes is so much harder than I expected it to be.  I've been trying to be realistic but given how I feel I must of pinned more on next weekend that I thought I had.


I keep telling myself I've been through this before, I did it after the stroke, I can do it again. I think that the difference is that after my stroke my recovery and progress to "freedom" was basically under my control, even though I thought the OTs were being way too strict and risk adverse most of the time.  This time my "freedom" mostly depends on the actions of others who show time and again that they "don't care" or "can't be bothered". As some one put it on Facebook the other day. Worst group project partners ever.


Sue if we get out of this sane it will be a miracle. Fingers crossed for all.

I'm trying to hang in there. All the support from here certainly helps.



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3 hours ago, swilkinson said:

So many things I want to do while I am still well enough to do them.

Absolutely Sue.


This year I think, has taught us to stop, slow down and smell the roses. And to appreciate what we have, and are able to do.


Have you a list started?



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2 hours ago, heathber said:


Sue if we get out of this sane it will be a miracle. Fingers crossed for all.

I'm trying to hang in there. All the support from here certainly helps.



Take care Heather.

Think about you all the time.


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I hope we get this beast  under control. Because of starting the winter season here, we are seeing a huge uptick in my state and I prefer to stay home. I think all that you are doing is a god-send to those in your congregation and it helps remind them that they aren't going through this alone. Oh, I chuckled when Alice was playing Wii and beat you. She must have been so happy and you are such a good granma. Enjoy your summer holidays and bring joys to others. 

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